Orglethorp
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So, last night I made a big decision, and I really think I was the right one, but right now I'm feeling all sorts of nervous!
I've been studying electrical engineering for the past 2 years now. This week is finals for academic term 4. I've been wishing for quite some time now that I'd picked computer engineering, but to change I would have to wait for this academic term to come back around (next summer semester) and hope the faculty lets me back and into computer.
I've been struggling with our circuits theory courses the whole way through. I do very well with all the math and computer stuff. I enjoy the hands-on lab classes like electromechanical devices. I hate any course that delves into the world of the pure physics of electricity. It doesn't click for me. I want to know how to use a transistor, not how to draw theoretical representations of its inner workings in terms of "equivalent circuits" and come up with values for internal components that don't physically exist just so that I can prove a teeny tiny current loss that I could have read off the transistor's data sheet.
Physics involving things on the atomic scale has never been my strength. If I can't see and observe it without a whole bunch of equipment telling me what's happening, then I just don't get it.
I picked electrical engineering because I'm interested in animatronics and avionics, and because I loved my electrical courses in high school. The trouble is, none of those things are electrical engineering. Animatronics happens when people with the right knowledge (frequently self-taught) and the right connections get into the film industry. Avionics is a skilled trade. What I did in high school electronics is more akin to being an electrician or technician. Furthermore, there aren't any opportunities to hold a career in animatronics in this province, and the need for avionics people is very, very small. With an electrical engineering degree, to have a career in this province, I'd either be going from construction site to construction site inspecting power stuff, or I'd be in an office doing a computer engineer's job.
This semester in particular, but the whole last year really, have been filled with stress. Stressing over assignments and midterms and final exams because no one in the engineering faculty seems to think that allowing us to have a list of formulas to reference is a good idea, despite the fact that in this day and age, no engineer is EVER going to sign off on a design without looking up their formulas. Even if they think they know all the formulas they need, they're going to have someone check it. Engineering exams should test application and problem solving, not how well we can memorize half a million little formulas.
I've been stressed about failing out of the program, because that too would result in waiting until this term comes up again next summer and hoping the faculty lets me back in. It's an all-or-nothing program.
Why am I so worried about that year delay? I'm 26, and my boyfriend and I are making preparations to buy or build our first house (possibly as early as this fall) and get married pretty soon. I'm going to want to start having kids very soon. If I have a baby before I'm done engineering, that puts me out of the program for at least a year, probably two. And then trying to do engineering homework with a baby at home?
The Decision!
I have decided that a degree in computer science is more suited to my needs and my life goals at this point.
I have already met all of the degree's elective / other subjects / total credit #s requirements. All I need is 15 computer science department courses and 3 math department courses. That's 3.6 semesters on a 5-course ("full time") load. It'll take longer than that because of prerequisites in those computer science courses and how frequently the right courses are offered, but it's still likely that I'll finish earlier than this engineering degree, and with a whole lot less stress. Because of work term requirements, engineering would have me graduating no earlier than May 2017. I could be done computer science by the end of 2015.
If I have to take time off my degree because a baby has come along, computer science will wait for me. Comp sci also has some of its courses offered online. I can minor or even double major in another subject area, to boot.
A comp sci class schedule would open me up to have a part time job on campus, ideally at the tech services counter in the library.
So why am I so nervous?
My circuits final exam is taking place right now, and I'm not there. I decided that in order to preserve my sanity and get a little extra time put in studying for my remaining three exams so I don't have multiple black spots on my transcript, I shouldn't even look at that exam paper. Knowing what sort of topics and questions are on that exam, I didn't have a chance at passing the course. I honestly don't think I had a chance of getting 25% on that exam. I am choosing not to complete the course (yes it will technically result in a fail) and choosing to make these changes rather than attempting a hopeless exam, getting all worked up writing it, spending all my study time this evening trying to calm down, and then worrying my whole trip back home away waiting for exam results. This way I know, and it was my decision.
But now I have to explain this to my classmates who've been with me for all of these courses over the past 2 years. I have to say goodbye.
I have to find out whether or not I'm still allowed to complete the work term I've already accepted. If I can then I'll be doing the first of the computer science courses online, and I won't need to worry about money, but I'll also have to deal with an entire semester spent doing a job I'll never have, facing classmates I won't be returning with, every day.
If I can't do the work term, then I'll take on a full (or close to full) course load on campus and try to get a part time job. But will I be able to get a job that doesn't cause me even more stress and still leaves my evenings and weekends free? I want to be off at the same time as Peter. At 26 I've put in more than my fair share of weekend at a grocery store, and I do not want to do that again. Ever.
I'm also needing to finish & submit my student loan application, but now I don't know what to report for academic program or projected personal earnings for the year.
There's also the very slim chance that I'll perform well enough on my remaining exams to pull off an overall average that gives me a probationary pass in engineering, on the condition that I write the circuits supplementary exam in January when we're back from the work terms. I am not counting on this. I don't know if the fact that I didn't sit the exam at all erases any chance of this even if my average is high enough. I don't know if I would attempt the supplementary exam or not.
I'm also stressing over the inevitable conversation to come tonight when my roommate comes home. He's in computer engineering, same year, which makes us class mates. (Electricals and computers do all the same courses up to term 4, then 3 of 5 courses are still the same in term 4 including this circuits course.) I'm going to have to explain myself and he's probably going to try to convince me to find a way to stay. I also have 2 text messages from him this morning along the lines of "are you awake and ready to go?" that tell me he knew leaving the house that I hadn't left yet.
I've been studying electrical engineering for the past 2 years now. This week is finals for academic term 4. I've been wishing for quite some time now that I'd picked computer engineering, but to change I would have to wait for this academic term to come back around (next summer semester) and hope the faculty lets me back and into computer.
I've been struggling with our circuits theory courses the whole way through. I do very well with all the math and computer stuff. I enjoy the hands-on lab classes like electromechanical devices. I hate any course that delves into the world of the pure physics of electricity. It doesn't click for me. I want to know how to use a transistor, not how to draw theoretical representations of its inner workings in terms of "equivalent circuits" and come up with values for internal components that don't physically exist just so that I can prove a teeny tiny current loss that I could have read off the transistor's data sheet.
Physics involving things on the atomic scale has never been my strength. If I can't see and observe it without a whole bunch of equipment telling me what's happening, then I just don't get it.
I picked electrical engineering because I'm interested in animatronics and avionics, and because I loved my electrical courses in high school. The trouble is, none of those things are electrical engineering. Animatronics happens when people with the right knowledge (frequently self-taught) and the right connections get into the film industry. Avionics is a skilled trade. What I did in high school electronics is more akin to being an electrician or technician. Furthermore, there aren't any opportunities to hold a career in animatronics in this province, and the need for avionics people is very, very small. With an electrical engineering degree, to have a career in this province, I'd either be going from construction site to construction site inspecting power stuff, or I'd be in an office doing a computer engineer's job.
This semester in particular, but the whole last year really, have been filled with stress. Stressing over assignments and midterms and final exams because no one in the engineering faculty seems to think that allowing us to have a list of formulas to reference is a good idea, despite the fact that in this day and age, no engineer is EVER going to sign off on a design without looking up their formulas. Even if they think they know all the formulas they need, they're going to have someone check it. Engineering exams should test application and problem solving, not how well we can memorize half a million little formulas.
I've been stressed about failing out of the program, because that too would result in waiting until this term comes up again next summer and hoping the faculty lets me back in. It's an all-or-nothing program.
Why am I so worried about that year delay? I'm 26, and my boyfriend and I are making preparations to buy or build our first house (possibly as early as this fall) and get married pretty soon. I'm going to want to start having kids very soon. If I have a baby before I'm done engineering, that puts me out of the program for at least a year, probably two. And then trying to do engineering homework with a baby at home?
The Decision!
I have decided that a degree in computer science is more suited to my needs and my life goals at this point.
I have already met all of the degree's elective / other subjects / total credit #s requirements. All I need is 15 computer science department courses and 3 math department courses. That's 3.6 semesters on a 5-course ("full time") load. It'll take longer than that because of prerequisites in those computer science courses and how frequently the right courses are offered, but it's still likely that I'll finish earlier than this engineering degree, and with a whole lot less stress. Because of work term requirements, engineering would have me graduating no earlier than May 2017. I could be done computer science by the end of 2015.
If I have to take time off my degree because a baby has come along, computer science will wait for me. Comp sci also has some of its courses offered online. I can minor or even double major in another subject area, to boot.
A comp sci class schedule would open me up to have a part time job on campus, ideally at the tech services counter in the library.
So why am I so nervous?
My circuits final exam is taking place right now, and I'm not there. I decided that in order to preserve my sanity and get a little extra time put in studying for my remaining three exams so I don't have multiple black spots on my transcript, I shouldn't even look at that exam paper. Knowing what sort of topics and questions are on that exam, I didn't have a chance at passing the course. I honestly don't think I had a chance of getting 25% on that exam. I am choosing not to complete the course (yes it will technically result in a fail) and choosing to make these changes rather than attempting a hopeless exam, getting all worked up writing it, spending all my study time this evening trying to calm down, and then worrying my whole trip back home away waiting for exam results. This way I know, and it was my decision.
But now I have to explain this to my classmates who've been with me for all of these courses over the past 2 years. I have to say goodbye.
I have to find out whether or not I'm still allowed to complete the work term I've already accepted. If I can then I'll be doing the first of the computer science courses online, and I won't need to worry about money, but I'll also have to deal with an entire semester spent doing a job I'll never have, facing classmates I won't be returning with, every day.
If I can't do the work term, then I'll take on a full (or close to full) course load on campus and try to get a part time job. But will I be able to get a job that doesn't cause me even more stress and still leaves my evenings and weekends free? I want to be off at the same time as Peter. At 26 I've put in more than my fair share of weekend at a grocery store, and I do not want to do that again. Ever.
I'm also needing to finish & submit my student loan application, but now I don't know what to report for academic program or projected personal earnings for the year.
There's also the very slim chance that I'll perform well enough on my remaining exams to pull off an overall average that gives me a probationary pass in engineering, on the condition that I write the circuits supplementary exam in January when we're back from the work terms. I am not counting on this. I don't know if the fact that I didn't sit the exam at all erases any chance of this even if my average is high enough. I don't know if I would attempt the supplementary exam or not.
I'm also stressing over the inevitable conversation to come tonight when my roommate comes home. He's in computer engineering, same year, which makes us class mates. (Electricals and computers do all the same courses up to term 4, then 3 of 5 courses are still the same in term 4 including this circuits course.) I'm going to have to explain myself and he's probably going to try to convince me to find a way to stay. I also have 2 text messages from him this morning along the lines of "are you awake and ready to go?" that tell me he knew leaving the house that I hadn't left yet.
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