DID Child parts doing adult activities in did

[Keen]

Do any of you with DID have times where a kid part is out but you are engaging in adult activities that a kid should not know how to do i.e. driving a car, cooking/baking, working, etc?
How do you or your therapist explain whats going on here?

 

[Sideways]

I had my 12 year old try to take over while I was driving once. It was pretty scary. When I pulled it apart with my T, we figured out that she’d been triggered becore I got in the car and was seriously distressed and wanted to get somewhere safe.

If you can communicate with them beforehand to go inside before you undertake adult activities that can help. If they’re refusing to go inside, or keep coming out at inappropriate times, it’s probably time to communicate with them about not just what’s going on for you, but also trying to get them to talk about why they’re trying to get your attention...?

 

[Keen]

Thanks for your response, @Sideways , I definitely want to find out why they show up at these times. But I also want to understand how I am able to still do these adult tasks despite a kid part being out? A 6 year old doesn't know how to make rice, but I've had times where it came out and I was still able to make the rice. A 13 year old doesn't know how to drive, but I still safely drove when the kid part was out. So I'm confused how this was possible.

 

[Ronin]

I guess that depends on your internal set up, & who you were as a child, & who kid yous are as a person.

But then, I am the opposite, kiddos around are generally functional, responsible and able with tasks, slid to kids adults or kids that were around in high confusion times and lacking orders and lacking cues what to do lesser so.

My therapists, current, simply do not get to know. I don't trust them enough with weapons.
But if I were to explain that, I would just say I do not remember how to do the thing, at the time.
Or that I am confused about this or that surrounding, and need input as soon as possible.

 

[Ronin]

So I'm confused how this was possible.

You are still, physically adult, and one who learned to drive.

That it was a child part up does not change what you whole, your brain, learned, as skills, across life.

 

[Keen]

That it was a child part up does not change what you whole, your brain, learned, as skills, across life.

That makes sense, thanks for that understanding, @Ronin

 

[shimmerz]

that a kid should not know how to do i.e. driving a car, cooking/baking, working, etc?

I am co-conscious. I know absolutely everything that is happening but my body is being hijacked. It's like I have an observer who is trying to keep me safe by talking sense into the younger part. My car is my safety, so I don't switch parts in the car. However, I do start to switch in long lineups at the grocery store -- like if I feel trapped in the lineup. If that happens I know that I have to be very careful of what money I hand over, whether I wait for change, to pick up my parcel. I do, however, with one exception only in 11 years, notice that I can use my PIN card to pay. That is entirely adult. But it is slower..... I have to pause to think about my PIN, or read the screen carefully. Or I get confused but not enough to make me incapable. It's almost like a strobe light effect with the survivor part and the dissociated part fighting over the controls and interrupting my executive processes enough to slow me down but not enough to take me down.

Being co-conscious makes me wonder to myself if DID has the same thing but it isn't recognizable as a 'voice' in the system yet. What makes me think of that is if that is true, there may be a part in each of us that overrides the chaos of the system to keep the body alive. Honestly, I should have been dead 10000 times over this past decade. But there were some really freaking crazy experiences where I literally was a part of an internal negotiation with the observer (who is always calm and never wrong) encouraging the dissociated part that was controlling the body to 'try this' and 'try that' and so on until the dissociated part pulled it together with the observers guidance. It was freaking fascinating. All of it.

Looking at it in retrospect, I really do believe that we all have that piece inside of us, telling us how to keep alive. I think people with DID just can't hear it until they reach co-consciousness. Anyway, maybe a crazy theory, but it is mine.

 

[whiteraven]

@shimmerz This is how we function now. I am almost entirely co-conscious and know everything that's going on - although it's behind a bit of a fog sometimes when someone else is out - most of the time. I have come to believe the plural self is the norm and that trauma creates an environment in which the secondary selves are more strongly present. That's not the philosophically- or medically-accepted view currently, but I've learned that to limit ourselves to what society sees as the norm is to limit our potential and our growth.

 

[shimmerz]

That's not the philosophically- or medically-accepted view currently, but I've learned that to limit ourselves to what society sees as the norm is to limit our potential and our growth.

I completely agree with this. I believe the internal experience trumps any medical model. Have you read the Structural Dissociation thread on this forum?
Structural Dissociation?

almost entirely co-conscious and know everything that's going on - although it's behind a bit of a fog sometimes

Have you been able to establish communication between the co-conscious part and the traumatized part that is acting out yet?

 

[whiteraven]

I believe the internal experience trumps any medical model. Have you read the Structural Dissociation thread on this forum?
Structural Dissociation?

Interesting. I tend to believe that we can all function with plural selves, traumatized or not. Certainly trauma creates more chaos and havoc, and other challenges (like depression) make it more difficult to manage our selves, but I don't think one has to be traumatized to recognize many parts.

Have you been able to establish communication between the co-conscious part and the traumatized part that is acting out yet?

I have many insiders who act out and yes, I am co-conscious with several of them. Not all the time, but most. Of course, they have their own stuff going on that I am not privy to, but when it's important, I know about it.