Coping With Adrenalin Overload

[trying all the time]

Coping with adrenalin overload

I believe that I have had episodes of PTS since the age of 11, when I was raped by a known person but not a family member. I cannot go into all of the detail of the ongoing psychological terrorism of this situation or subsequent traumas at this time. Suffice to say that I have been in various kinds of therapy for most of my life since then. I have been given a number of diagnoses by psychiatrists who have spent very little time with me and really do not know me, but all of them carry an enormous stigma, particularly in my family, and require enormous doses of medication that has made me feel not only physically very ill, but more deeply traumatised. I am experiencing a deeply depressing period of my life now, and I wish I could find someone in my town who will consider the PTSD diagnosis and proper treatment for me as an individual.

I feel very isolated and have been estranged from my mother for a year. Every time we try to get past our history, we, mostly she, drags us back into traumatic past events and her assumptions, interpretations, accusations, insults and ultimately abuse. I need help and support but am not finding the support I need yet. Episodes and sypmtoms vary and are always brought on by another traumatic life event. The greatest difficulty I suffer is the lack of an emotionally supportive family. My only brother died tragically 12 years ago and the rest of my extended family are dotted around the globe and the country and are generally out of reach and totally out of contact with what is going on.

I put on a poker face smile, make up and great looking clothes when I have to make public appearances of any description and hide under my blanket, unable to eat or even drink when alone. I most often function at a good and strong level and achieve with reasonable success. However, when verbally or physically abused by someone I thought loved me and I could trust, or if I am to suffer intensive and ongoing criminal infringements on my home, I tend to backslide.

I am not in a good place now, despite having reached out to everyone I possibly can for support. I cannot stand the thought of having to face a night alone, but I don't want to go out either. I wish I had someone here to hold me and counteract my mother's horrendous opinion of me, and remind me how wonderful and kind and sweet and beautiful I am. Tears now...

 

[TLight]

Trying......my thoughts are with you.....I too experienced similiar things with my family for years..

I had to disconnect in order to literally save my life. You might consider doing the same. I know when you are alone, you crave what a 'family' is supposed to give you, love and support.

I went for a decade and a half, alone.....afraid of bed, afraid to go out, afraid of people......all because of the damage they inflicted on me year after year.

The best thing I've ever done for myself was to cut them entirely out of my life.

I ventured forward a bit into the world and now I have a loving, compassionate boyfriend who holds me and nutures me and generally gives me all the stuff that was so devastatingly withheld from me when I was a little girl. I also have a few carefully chosen friends whom I trust and know about me and accept me for who I am, even if they don't completely understand the scars I have to continue to deal with.

My hope is for you to have some of the good people out there come into you life......to help calm you, nuture you and give you everything you so obviously deserve.

Back to the topic of the thread......I too went through horrible adrenline overload, sick with CFS/Fibro, exhaustion, not sleeping for years, totally isolated, all my nails turned into fungus.......I swear, I almost died.

Looking back, I should have given up my meager little existence and checked into a hospital.......but I had to make the car payment somehow. But I literally almost died from the adrenline overload. I passed out several times, had ambulances take me in for fluids.........the stress was unbelievable. Yet still I thought I there was nothing wrong with me and nothing I could not 'muscle' my way through.

YOu can't muscle your way through PTSD. Unfortunately, it is truly a brain injury that takes years of treatment to improve the symptoms and meds to give us a fighting chance at times. I had a hard time coming to this conclusion,for I felt I could conquer anything. I can't conquer PTSD......I have to wear it, work with it, become partners with it, accept it and do everything in my power to come to some quality of life.

Quality of life......we've earned it.

 

[Lionheart]

The energy produced by adrenalin needs to be given a physical release, otherwise it stays in your system and does harm, so I suggest a walk when you are stressed and overflowing with adrenalin. It works for me anyways, hopefully, it will for you as well.

~Lewie~