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Core Beliefs & Counters

#52
The children aren’t obligated to choose who they were born to. That’s earned. Not obligated
What I have a problem with is, two dumbsh&its coming together sexuality--have kids and then, don't take care of them. They do their thing and don't want to be bothered. Even neglect them as much as going in the system. Who cares?

Core Belief: I will never have the love my partner gave me in another person. Most people are not capable and b$itch when they have to do anything for another human being. Show compassion, etc.

Counter: is look around.
 
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#53
This.

They're relatives, not family.
I'm adopted.....therefore, I technically didn't have family after the moment I was given away. They are family on a piece of paper only.....like x husbands......no, paper-no family... family are those people who treat you like you belong.....family is supposed to be a place you feel belonging....I never did....but with my girl firend, and her family.....they call me family......no need for a legal piece of paper to always feel welcome-I can just drop in. So you are right.....family is where one feels belonging.
 
#54
What I have a problem with is, two dumbsh&its coming together sexuality--have kids and then, don't take care of them. They do their thing and don't want to be bothered. Even neglect them as much as going in the system. Who cares?

Core Belief: I will never have the love my partner gave me in another person. Most people are not capable and b$itch when they have to do anything for another human being. Show compassion, etc.

Counter: is look around.
Wow.....never is a super really really long time....two years ago I decided men were dogs, all men were dogs, no man on this earth could be right for me....and now only a tiny part considers that my statement made in trauma....very black and white protective is still valid. Now, most men are dogs.....and it's not highly probable that there is one in my lifetime (cause I'm up there in the fourth quarter of life), that I'll find with the right mix of values and interests to want to risk building a relationship with.
 
#55
Wow.....never is a super really really long time....two years ago I decided men were dogs, all men were dogs, no man on this earth could be right for me....and now only a tiny part considers that my statement made in trauma....very black and white protective is still valid. Now, most men are dogs.....and it's not highly probable that there is one in my lifetime (cause I'm up there in the fourth quarter of life), that I'll find with the right mix of values and interests to want to risk building a relationship with.
You'll find one, no problem. I'm just a little bit different. I've owned a small business for 30 years so I'm use to being boss and men don't like that. ( hard to break)
Counter should be: work on being the opposite. Partner was entrapanuer..so we fit. Boyfriend is not so its more difficult for me. (Partner passed)
 
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#56
You'll find one, no problem. I'm just a little bit different. I've owned a small business for 30 years so I'm use to being boss and men don't like that. ( hard to break)
Counter should be: work on being the opposite. Partner was entrapanuer..so we fit. Boyfriend is not so its more difficult for me. (Partner passed)
Yep, got my own small business, too-very empowering......don't need a man for support, finally have my own my own place and made it to retirement!
 
#58
One core belief I have had is...."If you don't have family you don't have anything!"

I simply realized while lying in bed one day that this was not true. I still have a lot of things just not as many family members that are still living... It doesn't mean I am totally without!!! The mistaken belief made grief much more difficult than it would have been otherwise methinks.
 
#59
One core belief I have had is...."If you don't have family you don't have anything!"

I simply realized while lying in bed one day that this was not true. I still have a lot of things just not as many family members that are still living... It doesn't mean I am totally without!!! The mistaken belief made grief much more difficult than it would have been otherwise methinks.
Yeah....I had that one too......and a couple similar....If I don't have family, I don't belong anywhere, or I'm nobody, I'm not loved, I am bad.

Counter: I choose to be in the company of family who care's about each other and me, whom I don't fear their disapproval, and who makes me feel validated as a person.....not people who are cold, feelingless, and abusive to me. Family is a choice.
 
#60
My core beliefs at the moment.

Be a vital member of your team. And be the best you can be.

Counter= if your team is shit, then don't be afraid to find a new one. Life is to short to be constantly f*cked over. It's not narcissistic to be proud of who you are, what you can do and wanting to succeed.
 
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