Correcting thoughts

[Scandinavgirl]

Does anybody here suffer from bad "self-talk" that seems to be totally out of your control sometimes?
These thoughts have become a huge problem for me, as they are intrusive. Its like I can not control them coming, but I can try to correct the thoughts afterwards. Seems difficult, though.

These are thoughts like "you are a looser". "you deserve to be shot" or images of someone slapping me in my face or me cutting myself in the arm (I never do these things). Its like self-harm mentally I guess. Or some sort of self-hate that arises. It is usually a happening or certain circumstances that triggers these thoughts. When I am not satisfied with myself for example. They can bring me down to a low state. Have you found any good ways of dealing with these thoughts?

 

[LuckyDuck]

Intrusive thoughts are the term I've heard them called. And yes. Sometimes they're stealthy, too. Like going over the past constantly and having my mind go through what I could have said. Most times it's stuff where I would have rather have spoken my mind.

A lot of it has to do with the level of stress I go through. The less stress, the less they appear. The more, well fock that, I'ma outta here sort of thing.

I couldn't control it. I needed meds to help me clear myself of a lot of it. It helped because I was able to get to the root of the issue for myself: performance anxiety. Everything I did to benefit myself was difficult. The intrusive thoughts were a sign that I was way out of my depth and needed that extra bit of help, medicinally speaking. It's not the same for everyone, though.

Best of luck to you in your journey. They are a pqin in the arse to handle.

LD

 

[Friday]

There's an old ADHD trick : Can't control the first thought. CAN control the second!

I want to kill myself... But I'm not going to.

I wonder if I could jump from this roof to that roof... Should strap on a safety harness, first, that's a long drop if I can't.

I'm going to kick them in the head... No. No I'm not.

Etc.

First thoughts happen. Second thoughts are made.

 

[Sandstone]

I've heard intrusive thoughts referred to as "made thoughts" as they appear to drop into our heads from nowhere. I completely recognise " Someone should shoot me".

The explanation that I understand best is that they are a associative symptom, coming from a sort of flasback to another state or time. I have a mental image of them as being like a hernia bulging through weak muscle.

The approach I've taken is to create tangible anchors to the present in each room in my house. I listed three per room on a post-it and stuck them up. Things like a particular, tactile stone, the chenille curtains I made, the curve of a wooden shelf. I try to focus on them when the thoughts arrive. I find it hard though, as they are so frequent and often fleeting.

 

[RussH]

I think most of us suffer from negative thoughts, or negative feelings about ourselves. It is good that you recognize it is happening.
A thing to remember about PTSD; it is a liar. It will lie to you and tell you things about yourself that just aren't true, So when you hear these thoughts recognize they are lies.

 

[Saria]

I struggle a lot with this! I have this inner critic that never seems to shut up. So I have a lot of negative thoughts where the never ending theme is some sort of self-hatred.

I can not control them coming, but I can try to correct the thoughts afterwards. Seems difficult, though.

This site has been helpful for me in trying to change the critical self-talk.

http://self-compassion.org/exercise-5-changing-critical-self-talk/

In addition, I've also found it helpful to notice whenever I'm having the negative thoughts, and to label them instead of believing in them. Like, I try to notice when my thought is "I hate myself" and to mentally label it as for example self-criticism/self-judgement or negative self-talk. And also knowing that a thought is just a thought, it's not the truth! But it is painful though, and difficult to deal with. So I hope you'll find a way to work with it that works for you :)

 

[ms spock]

The David Burns book "feeling good" has a myriad of ways to challenge these thoughts, feelings and perceptions which he calls "Distorted Cognitions". It is well worth a read. It really helped me.

I started a thread https://www.myptsd.com/threads/name-that-distorted-cognition-thought-perception.54277/

you may have seen it, but if not it might interest you.

I started a poll because I am most interested to know what other members with PTSD know.
https://www.myptsd.com/threads/are-you-familiar-with-the-top-ten-distorted-cognitions.57711/

 

[Teasel]

I cam across the terms 8nner and outer critic on Pete Walkers website. It helped me understand this.

I learned to compare my inner critic to the daily mail :D
(A truly dreadful narrow minded bigoted newspaper) always helps me to laugh at negative thoughts :p

 

[Sandstone]

Does anyone else find themselves challenging the thoughts, only to move into beating themselves up for having them at all?

 

[7Cs]

I learned a simple technique years ago that helped with my most disturbing intrusive thoughts, the "I want to die" thoughts and unwanted visuals of how I would do it - even when really I wasn't suicidal!

I think it's called stop thought.

All you do is say out loud or in your head "Stop" EVERY TIME the intrusive thoughts pop up. It's probably best to work with one type of intrusive thought at a time especially if you do a lot of negative self talk or have many kinds of intrusives.

It can take a while... lots of "Stops" to make this work. Nothing else. No arguing with yourself or trying to change the thoughts. Just "Stop". As many times as it takes.

I used to have to do this many times a day and while I still have those thoughts occasionally, they aren't as persistent. I feel like I'm in control of them not them being in control of my mind.