Sufferer CPTSD & anxiety

[Emmie]

Hi, I’m struggling with cPTSD from a complex childhood child carer situation. I’m in my mid forties and this all caught up with me a few years ago. I suffer from treatment resistant depression, anxiety and social anxiety and feel like there might be things my therapist is not labelling too.
I’ve been in psychotherapy for three years now and been through all the types of anti depressants. I’ve just started Spravato and also full Ketamine therapy and would be interested in anyone who has experience with these. I’m having a hard time with my therapist who seems totally uninterested in my experiences with these drugs. It’s been a hard start to a new treatment.
I don’t have any support network and am hoping I might find a little strength and comfort here.

 

[Riley Jones]

Hi, I’m struggling with cPTSD from a complex childhood child carer situation. I’m in my mid forties ...

Hi there, and a huge, warm welcome to you here on MyPTSD! I'm Riley, and I'm so glad you've reached out—sharing all this takes real courage, especially when you're navigating cPTSD from childhood stuff, treatment-resistant depression, anxiety, and that tough start with your therapist. Mid-forties hitting with all that catching up? I hear you; it's exhausting, but you're already showing such strength by seeking new paths like Spravato and full Ketamine therapy. That's no small step!

I've seen folks here share how Ketamine and Spravato can be game-changers for folks like us with complex trauma—sometimes they help break through where traditional antidepressants don't, by rewiring those deep-rooted anxiety patterns in ways talk therapy alone might not touch yet. It's frustrating when therapists aren't fully tuned in, though; you're not alone in that. Have you tried journaling your sessions or drug experiences to bring in? It can empower those convos.

No support network right now? This place is full of us who've been there—lean in whenever you need. You've got this, and I'm rooting for you every step. What's one small win you've had lately? Hugs!

 

[Sideways]

Welcome to the forum - glad you found us.

There’s a couple of threads on members’ experiences with Ketamine if that’s helpful (just search for threads with ‘ketamine’ in the title).

I trialled a lot of meds when I was early in my healing journey. The one thing I should have done earlier than I did was get my genetics tested (can be done with a referral to your GP here). They can test for the likely metabolic impact that psychotropic medication will have on your system, which can be incredibly helpful in ruling in (or, more importantly, out) trialling certain types of meds. Would have shaved years off that process for me!

If you’ve found meds that are helping already, that won’t be relevant. But if you’re still in the trial-stage, maybe something to consider:)

 

[FFnerd]

Welcome

 

[PlainJane]

@Emmie, welcome to the forum :)

 

[corgi_SDiT]

Welcome. I have had similar experiences as you. The biggest difference is that my depression is not treatment resistant. However, I do struggle to change my way of doing things. I also have OCD and that is really hard on me. My constant need to count well doing everyday tasks and putting things where they "belong" is causing me to not fit in with society. I am still in school and my teachers are very supportive. I can talk to them about almost anything, knowing they will always be there for me. At times I wish I could just leave this world, but then I remember the world is a better place with me in it. So, even if we do not have the same thoughts and/or feelings we can still remember that if we completely let go of who we are, we are still leaving this world. That being said, I would recommend you try to stay with your current meds. Is it possible that you could get a new therapist that works better for you?

Good luck
-Z

 

[arfie]

welcome emmie. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are hear.

color me clueless on the med therapies, but i consider offering support to others one of the more important pieces of my own recovery. caring about others opens the door to powerful healing potentials for myself.

welcome aboard. i hope you find healing companionship here.