Depersonalization - Help?

[_demolition.lovers_]

Summary:
I had a tough day today, and when I came home, I started to disassociate/depersonalize. I did a lot of self harming, with razors and hitting my head for about three hours. Now I have a horrible headache, super nauseous, have ringing in my ears and am pretty sure I have a concussion. I just wanted to know some good ways to prevent this from happening again? I've learned that most classic grounding techniques don't work -- things generally have to be more hands on. Any ideas? Or anything to help keep myself safe? Thanks to all.

 

[sun seeker]

I'm sorry you are having this problem, it sounds scary.

So for now, if you think you might have a concussion, you need to go to the ER right away. Don't wait around and see. I'm assuming there is no one there with you? If that is true, you will need to call an ambulance yourself.

I do have some ideas about how to resist the urge to hit your head, but later, once you've been checked out to make sure you are okay.

 

[Justmehere]

Some of my favorite ways to ground:
Ice, sour or bitter candy, physical exercise, wrapping up in a blanket really tight, writing or drawing in words or marker on paper, tearing up paper. This is a weird skill, but it helps with the urge to hit myself: sitting so still, like I'm frozen. The feelings will usually get strong, as they would anyhow, and then they pass, and I will experience a lot of relief, and somehow, the challenge to be super super still keeps me from hurting myself.

Physical grounding does tend to work been better than other ways of grounding. One of the key things about grounding is that we have to practice it many times when it is not hard to do. Then it really works when we are in need of it.

By the way, concussion plus nausea equals time to go to the ER without delay. Do not fall asleep until you get checked out.

I'm so sorry today is going so badly and you are in so much pain. Hang in there, it can get better, a lot better. :hug:

 

[_demolition.lovers_]

So my mom doesn't think it's serious enough to bring me to the doctors, so now all I can do is try and find ways to prevent this from happening. @sun seeker , you said you had some ideas?

 

[sun seeker]

Do you live with your mother? I'm wondering how she decided this. I hope she is correct, but this is not something to take lightly.

Anyway, here is my advice about calming the urge to hit your head. I have had similar head issues and have had to work particularly hard on being nice to this part of my body. When the urge is intense, cold works best to dial it down quickly to a level where I can think. Get an ice pack or a bag of frozen vegetables out of the freezer and put it on your head or face. Take an ice cube and run it over your face and neck. Run a cold water tap and stick your head under the running water. The purpose of this is to bring you back to the present enough so you can think about what you are doing. After that, you can use other grounding skills to calm down.

 

[_demolition.lovers_]

Do you live with your mother? I'm wondering how she decided this. I hope she is correct, but this i...

I'm 14, so I still live with my mom. When it comes to me depersonalizing or disassociating, she thinks I fake it all for attention (which I don't), so I'm assuming she just waved it all off. But I also do hope she was right.

 

[_demolition.lovers_]

Thank you all for your suggestions and tips! I'm going to write them all down for future use.

 

[MysticRose]

During the summer, I had quite a lot of depersonalization as well. What really helped me was getting on my bike and driving around the countryside, finding a bench somewhere to sit on and write down what I felt and why I felt that way.

I wish you all the best, if this happens again, please get someone else to take you to the ER to get you checked out.

 

[sun seeker]

I'm 14, so I still live with my mom.

Oh! Okay, that changes things.

Are you saying she thinks you self harm for attention? That concerns me. Is it possible she just doesn't want to face that there is a problem? In that case, it becomes especially important that you have other people in your life who will take your problems seriously.

Do you have access to a therapist? The sooner you get help, the better. It sounds like there are some pretty serious issues going on that won't just go away. Kudos to you for looking for suggestions, but you need and deserve some help from a professional, too.

I suffered from what I now know to be PTSD from when I was around your age, though looking back, I had trauma-related symptoms from much younger. My parents looked the other way, so I can relate to how painful that can be to live with. If I'd been able to get some real help then, it's hard to imagine how different my life might be now. I really hope you are able to do that, if only a counselor at school. Would that be a possibility?

 

[The Albatross]

Ran into this... as I was looking into depersonalization for myself... think I want to get a copy. Putting it up here, may be helpful?

Overcoming Depersonalization Disorder: A Mindfulness and Acceptance Guide to Conquering Feelings of Numbness and Unreality Paperback by Fugen Neziroglu & Katharine Donnelly

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

Your mother is an idiot. I'm sure you already know that. She sounds like mine, she's an idiot too.

The reason we're all saying go to the ER is because concussion can be very serious and even life threatening. @Justmehere is saying don't go to sleep and I totally agree. The reason: if you have a concussion (and it sounds like it from your symptoms) and you fall asleep you mightn't wake up.

Is there someone else who can take you to the hospital? Another family member or a friend? I don't know about the US but here we have a number you can call for some medical advice and they will let you speak to a nurse or call an ambulance if they think you need to come in. Is there anything like that where you are?

I'm sorry your having a hard time hight now and that your mother isn't very helpful.

 

[Justmehere]

@_demolition.lovers_ - How are you doing now?

Is there someone else who can take you to the hospital? Another family member or a friend? I don't know about the US but here we have a number you can call for some medical advice and they will let you speak to a nurse or call an ambulance if they think you need to come in. Is there anything like that where you are?

That's a great idea. We have that in the US. It's called an "Ask-A-Nurse" line and they are usually free and a great resource! Just google for one in your area.