Did Your Spouse Give Up On You?

[renee5g]

Today has been horrible, I'm pretty sure my husband has been going behind my back and " hanging out" with a friend of ours.She is not into men but I have douts .He has made comments since my attack that I better get over it cause he won't deal with me like this and he wants a wife not a burden. I can't leave since I can't work because of my injuries and up coming operations plus I have 5 daughters.Now I have to deal with this,I'm strong but I can't do it all.Did your spouses give up on you? I have been married for 20 yrs.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

I got together 1-2 years after my attack...I knew it would be an issue and I was honest. Still, I wasn't prepared how my my PTSD and problems would affect him in the long run, and he wasn't as well. Sometimes I do feel like I am the reason he is so stressed. I keep getting better, and with that so does our bond. Despite implying how tired he is of me being this way, he is sticking it out and we are better for it. I am still afraid at times, that he would get sick of it before I am fully healed and well...But he's been really patient and I am giving it my best to get better and hope that I'm not too late. How long has it been since your attack? Sometimes it's hard for anyone other than people who have went through this, to grasp how much time and effort recovery takes. Even without health issues. Have you tried explaining to your husband exactly how and what you feel, but also telling him the steps you are taking to get better? And telling him more about what happened to you too? Or you can take the other approach and try to find venting outlets outside of him and leave the time with him for fun and being together. Knowing my boyfriend and how he was I get how hard it is on the spouse too. So if you guys have been through a lot together, try to understand as well, and give him time with his wife, remind him that the recovery process isn't permanent..I don't know which approach is best, since I don't know all about the situation. But it is hard being with a spouse while going through this. They end up going through a lot of it as well without understanding what it is fully. It's not easy. Hope you find a way to work out things with your husband. 20 years is a long time, it means you've had time to go through a lot together...So don't give up on him, even if he's pulling back a little.

 

[renee5g]

Seeking Africa, it's been 18 months since the attack 2 major surgeries 3or 4 procedures and lots of pt.He has commented I should be better physically and emotionally by now and I'm faking it for pity.I have at least 2 more major surgeries to go through ....I could only wish I was " faking" it.

 

[Bookoffee]

Yes. She promised me over and over again she will never leave and takes our marriage serious but now we sleep in different rooms and she told me our relationship is over. We are complete strangers to each other. I lost my job of 15 years. None of my friends or family talk to or return my texts. I feel as though I have lost everything. It is horrible.

 

[renee5g]

Bookoffee I get it! He won't look at me,mumbles under his breath how worthless I am.I would love to go back to work ,it's my only way out.

 

[Friday]

He has made comments since my attack that I better get over it cause he won't deal with me like this and he wants a wife not a burden.

He won't look at me,mumbles under his breath how worthless I am.

He has commented I should be better physically and emotionally by now and I'm faking it for pity.I have at least 2 more major surgeries to go through ...

& Im sure you want a husband... Not a callous prick who kicks you when you're down and snivels about it.

Has this man ever had your back, or has the world always revolved around him?

 

[renee5g]

Friday Jones, I think I've been shown his true side.I ignored a lot.