Difficulty using language to explain things I know

[joeylittle]

If you got none words at all, break what you do into steps, pause with each, describe what you are doing, and once you have a shared language for the activity, pass it on.

This is a very smart approach.

@Keen - for what it's worth - I have a particular kind of quirk, where sometimes I will describe a process that's been described to me in a non-linear way. It's a little weird, and I don't even think I could give an example. But I've just accepted it (generally) as a thing about how I communicate. Sometimes it leads to me having negative self-judgmental thoughts, but I try and put those away.

I'd recommend you experiment with how you'd verbalize these things, if you weren't trying to censor yourself at all. Does it help to use gestures? To speak in bullet-points instead of in sentences? Figuring out how you go about it is something you can do....understanding the pathology might be (frustratingly) quite far away, just based on where the research is, now.

 

[Keen]

Those are good ideas, thanks @joeylittle . Thats why this board is so great because we can get ideas that we never would've come up with on our own.

 

[Keen]

Thanks, @Ronin , those are really good ideas of workarounds I'd never thought of!

 

[TruthSeeker]

I have difficulty repeating back instructions despite understanding them and being able to behaviorally do them/follow them. The trouble is just in using language to explain what I know and understand in my head. So I can do what I'm asked to do, but can't explain to another person what the instructions were.

Here's an example: my boss describes to me how to work a new machine. He asks me to repeat the instructions back to him so he knows I understood. I can't repeat the instructions back, but I can show him I understood by running the machine the way he explained.

So the issue isn't with hearing or with understanding, its with my own use of language to explain something I know.

Does this sound like anything anyone is familiar with?

Practice daily tasks you do at home first. How to unload the dishwasher, but in steps (see below and choose a method that works for your brain-numerical or words). How to do a load of laundry. How to drive the car. How to use a Google app, how to watch Netflix/Prime; practice talking in steps aloud at home with familiar things.

Directions are linear.....they go from begining to end in an orderly fashion. When I get and have to repeat directions, I mentally put pointer finger up, and say step 1. The finger is a reminder of the step. Two fingers for step 2, 3 fingers for step 3 and so forth. When recalling them in front of your boss, you can tap your fingers on your leg or side.

Numerical:
Think in steps. Step 1. Put the key in the machine.
Step 2. Safey checks....X and Y before turning on the machine.
Step 3. Turn on and do X
Step 4. Stop and break
Step 5. Safety check....X and Y

Words:
Another way to do this is with transition words first, next, then and last:
First, I...............
Next, I.............
Then I............
Last I............

This is how I taught direction recall to disabled students. This is also how I recall steps or directions-to make things concise.

 

[Keen]

Thanks, @TruthSeeker , these are really great ideas! I will try them!

 

[katz]

One of the ways I learned how adaptive dissassoiction is it blunts learning...at least from my own experience.
It looks like you are functional enough to do the job but you are not fully present. Learning a new thing can be threatening if you have in unprocessed cptsd.
I always took notes whenever I am talking to my manager....and sometimes never understood what I wrote.
Now I do not dissociate as often but one telling is I see getting slow at things I know I can do and even I am good at.

It is quite adaptive and that masks it's damage.

I want to add dissassoiction affects very strong on the right hemisphere so language is quite impaired for that reason and your logic is not....

Hope that makes sense.

Thank you Grit for confirming some things for me. One, is that disassociation blunts learning. I had always heard that most survivors have a very low grade level. I had blamed myself for so many years. I also understand that it is because a survivor is more focused on survival and self protection. So the child is not able to concentrate on learning, while focused on just surviving.

Second, is your comment about it being adaptive and it masks it's damage. When I read that it made me stop in my tracks. I do a lot of paperwork for my job, so I need a lot of organization in my office. At my last job I used to have people tease me because I took so many notes.

I have a job now that gives me the chance to organize the office any way I want. I use lots of notes and letters to myself to help me keep the office going. Over the years, I have learned to utilize this.

You also mentioned language impairment. When I was growing up, when I had a dissociation episode, the first thing that went was my ability to talk ! I would just give my "sign" to a friend and they knew that I could not speak. So, thanks.

 

[MrMoonlight]

I have experienced similar and box them in the following categories. Not sure if it applies to your situation but thought I'd mention them.

• Mind running too fast, too many ways to explain and jumping from scenario to scenario while speaking.
• Under great stress, the thinking part of your brain shuts down using more ancient structures of the brain rendering me incapable of complex thinking.
• editing on the fly as someone mentioned

 

[grit]

Thank you Grit for confirming some things for me. One, is that disassociation blunts learning. I had always heard that most survivors have a very low grade level. I had blamed myself for so many years. I also understand that it is because a survivor is more focused on survival and self protection. So the child is not able to concentrate on learning, while focused on just surviving.

Second, is your comment about it being adaptive and it masks it's damage. When I read that it made me stop in my tracks. I do a lot of paperwork for my job, so I need a lot of organization in my office. At my last job I used to have people tease me because I took so many notes.

I have a job now that gives me the chance to organize the office any way I want. I use lots of notes and letters to myself to help me keep the office going. Over the years, I have learned to utilize this.

You also mentioned language impairment. When I was growing up, when I had a dissociation episode, the first thing that went was my ability to talk ! I would just give my "sign" to a friend and they knew that I could not speak. So, thanks.

Your comment is extremely valuable to me and touch me deeply. Thank you.
I want add a bit before I forgot or maybe I said already.
To overcompensation disassociation and become highly functional is a great feat... I really cannot overestimate. Imagine if or when we recover how much we could move..