Bookoffee
Platinum Member
I have known for a while now that my wife has wanted to end our relationship. I still held onto the hope that we would be able to work things out as this new trauma treatment I am doing through neuro-feedback is helping me. I am going out more, I am able to start thinking clearer and my memory is starting to come back.
Thursday I missed read her text and thought she said it was ok for me to eat her last home-made cookie a co-worker made for her for her birthday over a week ago. She is extremely sensitive about her birthday because it is four days after Christmas.
During this text messaging she was showing me the new cookies that this same co-worker made. When she got home with them she offered me one. I told her no thanks because the birthday cookie was stale and my stomach was a bit upset.
She was so upset and angry at me, telling me there is no hope for our marriage to ever work. She was telling me that I never think about her and how no one thinks of her. She names off people that didn't wish her a happy birthday and how the only thing she got for her 36th birthday was home-made cookies from a co-worker and something that she has been wanting for the past year.
It took me a few months to work with the shop in the city that sells what she wanted. I am dealing with agoraphobia. After months of talking with this shop, we finally made a date and time where the shop would most likely be empty and no cruise ships will be in. It was the perfect gift! We had a wonderful day when she reminded me what she wanted for her birthday. Bad pokerface. She was so excited and thrilled for days.
All those people she named off that didn't wish her a birthday actually did through Facebook instead of text. For my 40th birthday, I spent it alone at a farm. We had a fight in the morning and I left without her. Not one person wished me a happy birthday. No Facebook, text, card, skywriter....I have eight sisters and five brothers.
During the summer I lost my job that I had for 15 years due to the PTSD and agoraphobia. We had to cash out my retirement and with that money we bought a new vehicle. I let it be in her name. I am not sure if I knew at that time if I knew the relationship was over or not.
Since Thursday night, I have been filled with so much anger towards her. I can't be nice to her anymore, no matter how much I try. When she got home from work today, I had used something of hers and I thought she was looking for it so I gave it to her.
Again she gets upset with me and tells me to stop taking care her and kissing her ass. She continues on and I couldn't listen to it anymore so my ugly angry head came out. She told me that she printed out the divorce papers today and I need to call my sister to see if I can live with her.
My father passed away in July. Every time I would bring up the subject of visiting him before his death or about his funeral, she would remind how horrible they treated me growing up. It would just increase my anxiety and all those horrible scary negative unwanted hated discarded feelings. I could not leave my house and face anyone. I was also in-between hospitalizations.
I was not mentioned in the obituary. I was not given an inherence that I was promised. I see a sister going around the world in thirty days and another get all the joint replacements that I also need. Another one going back to college.
At this point I have no income. I broke down after my wife told me about printing out the divorce papers and I posted on Facebook for a friend or family member to contact me as I need someone to talk with. That was over five hours ago. Not one sibling has reached out. I even told them it could be over IM or text.
How can I handle my anger and deal with life under the same one bedroom apartment? I sleep on a bed in the living room and she stays in the bedroom.
Thursday I missed read her text and thought she said it was ok for me to eat her last home-made cookie a co-worker made for her for her birthday over a week ago. She is extremely sensitive about her birthday because it is four days after Christmas.
During this text messaging she was showing me the new cookies that this same co-worker made. When she got home with them she offered me one. I told her no thanks because the birthday cookie was stale and my stomach was a bit upset.
She was so upset and angry at me, telling me there is no hope for our marriage to ever work. She was telling me that I never think about her and how no one thinks of her. She names off people that didn't wish her a happy birthday and how the only thing she got for her 36th birthday was home-made cookies from a co-worker and something that she has been wanting for the past year.
It took me a few months to work with the shop in the city that sells what she wanted. I am dealing with agoraphobia. After months of talking with this shop, we finally made a date and time where the shop would most likely be empty and no cruise ships will be in. It was the perfect gift! We had a wonderful day when she reminded me what she wanted for her birthday. Bad pokerface. She was so excited and thrilled for days.
All those people she named off that didn't wish her a birthday actually did through Facebook instead of text. For my 40th birthday, I spent it alone at a farm. We had a fight in the morning and I left without her. Not one person wished me a happy birthday. No Facebook, text, card, skywriter....I have eight sisters and five brothers.
During the summer I lost my job that I had for 15 years due to the PTSD and agoraphobia. We had to cash out my retirement and with that money we bought a new vehicle. I let it be in her name. I am not sure if I knew at that time if I knew the relationship was over or not.
Since Thursday night, I have been filled with so much anger towards her. I can't be nice to her anymore, no matter how much I try. When she got home from work today, I had used something of hers and I thought she was looking for it so I gave it to her.
Again she gets upset with me and tells me to stop taking care her and kissing her ass. She continues on and I couldn't listen to it anymore so my ugly angry head came out. She told me that she printed out the divorce papers today and I need to call my sister to see if I can live with her.
My father passed away in July. Every time I would bring up the subject of visiting him before his death or about his funeral, she would remind how horrible they treated me growing up. It would just increase my anxiety and all those horrible scary negative unwanted hated discarded feelings. I could not leave my house and face anyone. I was also in-between hospitalizations.
I was not mentioned in the obituary. I was not given an inherence that I was promised. I see a sister going around the world in thirty days and another get all the joint replacements that I also need. Another one going back to college.
At this point I have no income. I broke down after my wife told me about printing out the divorce papers and I posted on Facebook for a friend or family member to contact me as I need someone to talk with. That was over five hours ago. Not one sibling has reached out. I even told them it could be over IM or text.
How can I handle my anger and deal with life under the same one bedroom apartment? I sleep on a bed in the living room and she stays in the bedroom.
