Do You Have A Wish List?

[jaccat]

My therapist has set me a challenge. Next week I am to tell her one achievable thing that's on my wish list. I am really struggling with this so I thought to reach out and see if anybody here has a wish list and what sorts of things are on it. Also any advice to help me would be hugely appreciated.

Problems I have:

Do people really have wish lists?

Making one involves admitting wanting things. Wanting means giving myself permission. Giving myself permission means thinking I deserve things.

Having a wish list involves believing in a positive future.

I guess that's what my therapist is challenging, but right now my head just won't let me go there. I can think of things I will get at some point when the time is right but they're not the kind of things she means. I don't think a new carpet counts!

 

[Kisharha]

Because I am stubborn as a mule and hate being told what to do, I'd most likely go back with the my goal being 'I wish to get through the next appointment without strangling my doctor'. Should at least work the first time, but after that you'll need more ideas.....

I know what you mean about trying to think positive, I just can't do it - at all - under any circumstance. There's no way to be positive when I hate everything there is in this world. I hope someone can come along with some good idea's for you, but I think in the end it's going to be what YOU want. How about a goal to go out somewhere in particular, or to talk yourself out of bad thoughts (this REALLY depends on what your day to day troubles are like)... Do you know if they are asking for short or long term goals?

 

[illusionist]

It also means being realistic in what your wishes are....Otherwise we could end up wishing for the unobtainable..and end up living a life where we are never happy as we can't achieve our wishes which are often just dreams.

I've always wanted to be a mathematician...but the way my brain is, it's totally unobtainable.

 

[jaccat]

She means something more short term than long term, I think. Something obtainable, but then if it's on a wish list it's not going to be something I can just go out and get. I'm so confused.

 

[illusionist]

What about something you can save up for....say a foreign holiday?

 

[notsurewheretoturn]

It doesn't have to be something you can purchase such as a holiday or new car. What about setting a time goal on this wish, something like I will lose x pounds in the next month, or I will finally sort out my wardrobe and donate my unwanted clothing to charity. Or write that long overdue letter to a friend.

They can be classed as wishes to, it doesn't have to be material, it could be something you've been putting off for a while.

 

[Changing4Best]

I have a wish, but I have no idea if it will come true or not. I have a dentist appointment next week and I wish I would have no cavities. Next to that, I hope if I do have any, that it will only be one. Realistically, I think that this is a hope, but I am not sure what the difference between a hope and a wish is. Like I can say, "I hope I only have one cavity like I had last dental check-up." Or maybe that is more correctly a prayer?

 

[Changing4Best]

I've always wanted to be a mathematician...but the way my brain is, it's totally unobtainable.

Oh yeah! I can relate. I'd love to be able to balance my checking account. But the best I can do is to get a weekly statement from my bank and then estimate how much I spend during the next week, so I don't overdraw. So far so good. I have not overdrawn since I started to do it that way.

 

[barefoot]

This thread is spookily perfect timing for me! I'm going to be 40 next year and am already feeling less than impressed about that. So the other day I decided to create a kind of bucket list - 40 things to do before I'm 40. I thought it might break things up a bit and lighten up my mood about moving in to a new decade.

But, like you, I'm finding the reality of what to put on the list quite difficult...
Hence, I have nothing on my list so far!

I'm thinking I'm going to start small - not aim for a load of huge, expensive, 'life-changing' experiences. So I think I'm going to think in terms of what have I always quite fancied doing but, for whatever reason, I've never got round to doing... Even things like classic films that I'm embarrassed to say I've never got round to watching.

Can you think of anything that others may think are small, perhaps even quite ordinary things, but you like the idea of them and would just quite like to do them?

 

[Gadgie]

My wish, to have another day with my late wife.

My wish, would be to have a day without back pain.

My wish, to see my G/kids again.

My wish, to have a proper nights sleep.

 

[Ronin]

I don't have a wish list; I have a goal list.

Okay, I have something of a wish for other people's wishes & them being well & possibly in my life, but don't know how much 'wish list' that is, it's more a hope list.

 

[barefoot]

if it's on a wish list it's not going to be something I can just go out and get.

Actually, I think it can be something you can just go out and get - if you're not going out and getting it at the moment but would like too.

For instance....Whenever I go past a lovely cake shop like Patisserie Valerie <swoon> I always think 'I must go in one day and, just for the sake of it, pick the most exciting cake I can see and sit and have tea and cake'. I think that EVERY TIME! And yet I've never done it. It's not a difficult thing to do, it's not like I haven't got time to spend an hour or so in a cake shop, it's not going to break the bank, it's nothing earth-shattering, courageous or transformative. It's just something I think would be nice but I just never get round to actually doing it. So I'm just going to decide to go one day - not a massive deal, just a little treat that I've never got round to.

I think don't get hung up on the pressure of the term 'wish list' because I think that implies doing something huge and daring like jumping out of a plane or something :-)