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Emerg Services Do you have to give it a go to know if you're ready to get out there?

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It’s a way to ground out here & now, in this moment, by finding 5 things.

Something you
- See
- Hear
- Taste
- Touch
- Smell

For me, this doesn’t work if I’m stuck in my head (nor it’s cousin, find 5 blue things or similar), because it just pushes me deeper into the memory or my head.

I still use sensory tricks, by doing them, usually by doing something rather opposite of what I’m doing in my head, rather than by describing what I’m aware of.
 
Oh you just pick one of the senses, I like touch, and you consciously acknowledge what you are touching and tell yourself "my hand is on the desk", "my feet are on the floor", "my back is on the chair" (whatever applies). It just grounds you in the present. You can also do sight etc. "I see blue sky" but I find touch most effective for me.
 
Very welcome @Elmez, hope it helps. I find it really effective when I feel I'm going into a panic, getting anxious or if I'm going to cry at an inappropriate time (happens, alot lol).
 
My T has me do 5 things but a bit longer version -- find 5 things I can see/hear/touch then 4 things, then 3 and so on. I usually get settled in about the time I hit 3
 
I developed ptsd back in the 80's but didn't get my diagnosis until a coup!e of years later. The "treatment" back then was 12 sessions and then according to Workers Comp you were "cured". I should've ran and gone for a medical leave but like a "good soldier" I went back and spent another 25 yrs babysitting humanity and exposing myself to more crap while being messed up.

That being said however I had a good platoon, good Supervisors. Reflecting back that helped me to keep going.
 
I have to use something that kinda shocks me out of it like a strong tastes or smell that I like ( or even dont) the five thing doesn't work for me.
 
Going back to doing anything is going back to what I was (trying) to do before. Everyone thinks I'm ready, even me, sometimes. People bring on my symptoms and avoiding them is avoiding my symptoms. I can't stand trying to deal with people and getting triggered all over the place and having to try and think about what I should or shouldn't say and how I'm feeling. My condition is real and it affects me deeply in all my dealings with people. I'm aware always that I'm not really all right and wonder if or when others notice it. As usual (my whole life) I'd like to try and find a way to make at least some money without ending up like I was. I can't ever do that again, it wasn't living. All I ever wanted to do to simplify it, is have the ability to deal with people more or less normally or at all. (At least so they don't notice.) We will see. I don't need to be first, I just don't want to be last because my inner workings won't allow me anything else. Somewhere in the middle would be nice.
 
I think it may be playing with fire....

Your threshold for dealing with whatever caused your ptsd is undoubtedly lower....meaning triggering and symptom re-emergence is more likely.

If it’s a pride thing, is it worth going back and risking a PTSD relapse that could mean you can’t work at all? (Let alone in the same line of work.)

I personally wouldn’t risk it. I don’t think it’s worth playing Russian roulette with your future and your health.
 
@EveHarrington you make a great case for not returning. This is my 26th year in Fire/EMS. At this point I'm too young to retire and too old to start over. I'm sure some of you all have had to make a similar choice, stay and risk things getting ugly again or walk away and start something else. Not a fan of the soup sandwich.
 
I'm sure some of you all have had to make a similar choice, stay and risk things getting ugly again or walk away and start something else.
I had to walk away after 23 years.... broke my heart. I've been out 7 months and I don't regret it for a minute. Best thing I could have done --which was a huge surprise. Didn't expect that at all
 
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