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Does anyone burst into tears because of their PTSD

katz

MyPTSD Pro
#25
I often want to cry, but can't. I'm so afraid that I won't be able to stop. It scares me to think that if I lose control, I will be taken to the hospital for being out of control.
When I need to, I just go for a walk by myself, so I can cry - with no one watching me. And, I know that the exercise helps me also. I also can go downstairs to be alone. However, my husband can't seem to understand that this crying is good for me. It releases a lot of my pent up emotions.
 
#26
My therapist said that I have symptoms related to PTSD. Panic attacks, nightmares etc
I grew up in an unsafe house hold where I was physically abused by my mothers boyfriend at the age of three. My mum later married him and denied what he did although there are plenty of photos (taken by my Dr) to prove otherwise. I don't speak to her any more, she moved away and never left an address. I was bullied in school allot because of marks on my body.
I get allot of feelings of rejection and feel like noone wants me.
My coworkers, who are very understanding, notice that I'm down. I end up bursting into tears randomly at times. Is this normal for PTSD?
I often cry about it, the unfairness of it all. My brain just cannot comprehend how the trauma happened - but the aftermath of it all.. the PTSD... it feels like a life sentence. And I definitely cry about it and the person I have become.
 
#27
The brief answer is, no! That's mostly because tears don't come easily, they didn't have any use back then, so they got frozen, -- slow melting

What I do experience are days when I feel like I am carrying a large pale of water filled to the brim, on a Saturday afternoon through a busy shopping centre, and I am trying to get the pale back home without spilling it. In these moments, anything could take me over my own edge, everything feels so precarious

In these moments I can feel what is labelled as 'emotional dysregulation', is a sense of not being able to hold what I am carrying, instigated by being hip deep in disturbing memories (flashback) when this happens, and of course a kid doesn't know how to carry certain experience, they need to be shown, this is where the re-parenting (regulating?) comes in. Maybe

Anyway, I have gone off on one

All this to say I can relate, albeit in a different way:)
 
#28
I often cry about it, the unfairness of it all. My brain just cannot comprehend how the trauma happened - but the aftermath of it all.. the PTSD... it feels like a life sentence. And I definitely cry about it and the person I have become.
I can completely relate to what you've posted. It is unfair. All of it. It is unfair that we were abused as children when we should have been cared for and loved. It is unfair that because of the abuse our brains are now wired in such a way that normal life is a total challenge. It is so very, very unfair. You are completely right. And you have every reason to cry.

I use to get in trouble for crying as a child. For longest time, I couldn't cry, even over normal "make a person cry" events. Somehow, after my psychologist over years of telling me it is okay to cry, it finally sunk-in one day. Now I'm in active PTSD grief mode.

I cry over the horrible way I was treated as a child. I cry over the terrible decisions I've made as a result of the abuse. I cry, because my childhood and prime years are lost. I cry because I am finally feeling decades of stuffed-down feelings. I cry because I yearn for things that will never be. I cry because I'm afraid of my future. I cry because I wonder if I will ever feel whole. I cry. I cry. I cry.

And best of all, I don't feel as though I am doing anything wrong. I am allowed to cry.
 
#29
I often want to cry, but can't. I'm so afraid that I won't be able to stop. It scares me to think that if I lose control, I will be taken to the hospital for being out of control.
When I need to, I just go for a walk by myself, so I can cry - with no one watching me. And, I know that the exercise helps me also. I also can go downstairs to be alone. However, my husband can't seem to understand that this crying is good for me. It releases a lot of my pent up emotions.
I can so relate to the fear of being taken to the hospital for being out of control. FK NO!
 
#32
I have the same thing. Usually if someone recognizes my pain or ongoing struggle or my inner values... the dam breaks. Other times it is when stresscup is overfilled and spills. This also happens when i resonate with another persons hardship.

Crying when done in safe environment is like the valve on a pressure cooker helping decompress whats inside.

Hope u feel better afterwards.
 

katz

MyPTSD Pro
#33
I have the same thing. Usually if someone recognizes my pain or ongoing struggle or my inner values... the dam breaks. Other times it is when stresscup is overfilled and spills. This also happens when i resonate with another persons hardship.

Crying when done in safe environment is like the valve on a pressure cooker helping decompress whats inside.

Hope u feel better afterwards.
Exactly ! And very well said ! Thanks.
 
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