ED Does anyone else have an eating disorder?

[EmoxxKid]

Hey this is Geneva…


I have a over eating disorder and I was just wondering does anyone else on here suffer from any kind of eating disorders as well?

Over eating is just that….
I find myself eating an amazing amount of food to fill that emotional void I suppose.

Just wondering…

Geneva

 

[goingonhope]

Geneva, I use to have terrible eating disorders, some which nearly killed me, and yet it still got mostly neglected and left untreated. As much as I struggled to get help with these at times, I failed. First it was anorexia, and then for a short time bulimia and then quickly progressing into, what I was told was bulimiarexia.

So it progressed and then hand in hand with it came other threatening physical conditions. These days, that is all in my far past, but what I'm still left with is little to no will to eat food or meals throughout the day, and will eat supper contingent upon certain conditions being met. Otherwise, I have no desire or ability to eat.

But, OMG, I use to eat just that too, amazing amounts of food, specifically food high in sugar and bulk foods. Just thinking back it was so horrible. The sugar was most definately then a drug for me and the other who knows, I would numb and zone out, as well.

Hope

 

[Deleted member 487]

I don't eat to fill an emotional void, I eat for two reasons- first I love eating. Good food is great! Second, as a kid I remember having to steal cattle corn, fresh from the stalk, to eat. Poverty wasn't something new to me as a kid.

 

[Lisa]

I'm a comfort eater, but I wouldn't say I have an eating disorder... just a regular girl who when down in the dumps grabs for chocolate!

I do, however have obsessive tendencies with food, and with being neat and tidy at times, but both of these seem better these days. In fact this has post has made me realise that I haven't obsessed as much in a while now! I went through a 2 year stint of intense eating issues 18-20 (22 now). First it was restricting calorie intake daily, then I started missing days of food. Then bulimia with it, obsessive exercise, total obsession with food and calories and my weight. I became terrified of putting on weight, and at one point terrified of staying the same weight- If I wasn't losing weight, I wasn't happy. I couldn't trust myself to eat normally and not get fat. Before that I bounced backwards and forwards with over eating and dieting.

I moved to university, and I sort of went the other way for a while, eating a lot, then dieting in the summer, but I don't think about food and my weight every second of the day anymore. Just have good and bad days with it, mostly it's not a problem to me anymore. I am more likely to have a binge than stop eating.

For me, in all honesty, I think recognising my PTSD, and recognising what my real issues are helped me to concentrate on that rather than a distracting obsession. I used dieting to control, and I used over eating to comfort and distract, and I always felt like I was in a war with myself. Sometimes I look back and I can't believe how much I did and didn't eat at those times.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I have had, and probably still have an Eating Disorder. I have weighed in at 201, and down to 109 withing 6 months. Anorexic, bulimic, emotional eater, exercise nut, calorie counter. Been there done that.

I think it's all about self esteem, and when they develop a pill for that..... I will be the first person standing in line to get my script....

So you are not alone with the food problem.....

 

[nor]

Oh yes----I have suffered from an eating disorder my entire life. I thought that when I got older (I'm 51 now), I would be able to be happy with my body and weight-but that just isn't so.

When I was little, I used to overeat (with my mother constantly watching me and negatively commenting), and then in college I found out the amount of control I had by not putting food into my mouth. It felt so good to deprive myself-sick.

I was down to 80 lbs and still losing when I had a type of "intervention" from some friends. It worked, but to the extreme-In 5 months I had gained 50 lbs.

I have since gone way down again. Since having gone through menapause though, it has been difficult to go down to my "ideal" weight (probably a blessing). My eating disorder is now back to the starvation one. I watch the clock so that I can eat at 6pm and not before. Then after eating dinner, I take a sleeping pill to go to sleep so I won't eat anymore until the next day. I excerise weekly (not as obsessive as I once did), and I get on the scale whenever I need to go to the bathroom (stripping off all my clothes to get the correct weight). I don't use the laxatives and diuretics like I used to though (big deal, huh!). I could tell you all kinds of things I did, but I think you get the picture. I should have probably been hospitalized, but back in the 70's, no one really knew what "anorexia" was. I have borderline osteoporosis and that still doesn't make me stop-it is terrible.

I have had people tell me how "great" I look for having lost 11 lbs in 3 months (about the same time my PTSD started to really kick in and I made the decision to come off a "mood stabilizer"). I was a size 8, and am back down to a size 6. I am afraid to put any food into my mouth in fear of gaining that extra pound. I have a teenage son, and try to tell myself that I need to stay "healthy" and take care of myself, but it just doesn't matter.

Sorry-didn't mean to get carried away with my story-but I just wanted you to know that there are even older people out here that just can't kick the habit. My sister (who suffered the same childhood trauma as I) also suffers from anorexia. She is 59. But she will binge in front of people, and then starve for days after (chain smoking and drinking black coffee). She is not receiving any help at this time.

We just started treating my PTSD, and hopefully that will help my self esteem issue, and finally let me eat. Unfortunately, I don't see that happening any too soon.

Good Luck
nor

 

[madjon]

varies, when im twitchy i dont eat, get all tense and maybe a sandwich in a week or so, then when im not twitchy but feeling low i eat an amazing amount of junk, been trying to level it out, didnt eat properly for a few years, no money no real food and no real caring for it, got a vit deficiency from not eating, then on other side i eat too much and get to a certain point and go im eating too much, and have the waist to prove it , going through times when i ate what i could get, it seems i eat what i have, though at times i know its just because im feeling low or nervous, tried buying lots of fruit to munch on,helps with the weight, it works but i run out of fruit too fast, something ive been working on a long time.

 

[EmoxxKid]

Thank you for opening up to me everyone....

Geneva

 

[nor]

After having posted on this thread, and then re-reading it, I finally decided on telling my doctor that I was suffering from an eating disorder. Also because, I receive more insurance coverage if he is treating that, rather than PTSD-screwed up system.

Anyway, I told him. But, he didn't say anything much to stop me from starving myself. Just asked me questions about how I do it, and when it started. How much I "want" to be-and I explained that I have been through this before, and I can give him an "ideal" weight, but I can guarantee that once I am at that weight, I will want to lose "just two more pounds", so that I can "eat and not worry about it". And then two more pounds after that and so on.

Just thought I would tell you that I finally mentioned it to my therapist too. Also finally told him that I came off (completely) the mood stabilizer that he had me on too.

It was a "great" session.......NOT!

nor

 

[EmoxxKid]

Good for you dude!.......It's takes a lot of balls to be able to tell something that kinda shit...even a doctor....

 

[nor]

Hey! Thanks!! I didn't look at it that way!!

nor

 

[71nothing]

Wht is it i am so focused on calories and such but I can allow myself to have alcoholic beverages even though the calorie count worries me? At 4:00 I have had 469 calories and half of them are from alcohol. It's going to be a long night.