Emergency plan?

[hopefully optimistic]

Hey all-I started therapy for PTSD about 6 months ago. Childhood stuff camenup (seemingly out of nowhere). Anyway, just this week I was asked to set up a plan of who I would contact if my anxiety level gets to an 8-10. Honestly, I doubt I’d tell anyone. It’s been there before, and I couldn’t imagine calling anyone and asking for help. Is this common? I’m not even sure why I can’t imagine calling or anything, except it feels terrifying.

 

[Ronin]

Are there text based services, where you are, if you can text?

(Assuming it is not words and emotions and altogether overload making stringing things together difficult, but yes to common, no matter the cause. :) )

 

[hopefully optimistic]

Ronin-there probably are. I didn’t consider that because she was asking for actual names of people ? afterwards I emailed and said-in all honesty, I’m not likely to call anyone. Maybe email. But usually I isolate when things get really tough.

 

[FauxLiz]

@hopefully optimistic I completely understand and struggle with this as well. I have been asked by therapists in the past, while inpatient and most recently with my current t. My kids are the only ones that I can think of and even then its a stretch because I wouldn't want to concern them (I know crazy when you really think about it). This disorder has facilitated my isolation to the point that I honestly don't know if I would reach out when I am at that point which creates this never ending loop.

 

[Skywatcher]

I had an anxiety 9 happen back in September. I was alone somewhere and didn’t think that I could drive. I texted/called my husband, 3 friends and emailed my therapist. Also called my therapist, which I only do in an emergency. After communicating with enough people, I calmed down and could drive home. Navigating ptsd is hard. If you trust anyone enough to help, sometimes it is necessary.

 

[meander]

I feel like I’m in this now and I’ve spent all morning trying to work out who or how to get help. I go full circle back to saying to myself I’m being dramatic and to get on with everything then round to the anxiety and fear of work and how I won’t cope and will be in a daze...I’m scared to contact my T cos it’s all fairly new relationship and I don’t know how she thinks on that but then a piece of me is so beyond caring that I just think do it! Instead I too isolate.

 

[Friday]

Honestly, I doubt I’d tell anyone

This is exactly why you make a plan. So that you can train yourself to do the things you wouldn’t otherwise do, &/or to be able to kick immediately into action what you want to do, instead of having to figure out what in the hell to do at all, much less what you want to do, or would be best to do.

just this week I was asked to set up a plan of who I would contact if my anxiety level gets to an 8-10.

Try backing up a step.

Contacting someone who’s got their shit together when you’re at breakdown levels, is unparalleled good advice.

But?

1. it’s only one part of “what to do” when your SUDS is rising
2. It can take some time -and luck- to get that set up.

So...

1. What can you do in addition to contacting someone (bonus: that would also make you more likely to also contact someone?), that may have nothing to do with reaching out?

(This is a super huge -in a good way! :D, and highly individualized question, that I’m not even going to attempt to answer. Although some ideas will get sketched in below. I’m only bringing it up, because it’s not like if you don’t have a reach-out list that you’re f*cked. It’s just one tool, of many. )


2. How can you start building a ‘support network’? (I hate that phrase :wtf: Seriously, certain psychobabble phrases just set my teeth on edge. It does cover it, though).

- Partly? Especially since you asked if it was common to not have it... Turn the concept on it’s ear a moment. If you’re a single parent, and you need childcare? Having a collection of people you trust to watch your kid is vital. You don’t want to suddenly -much less regularly- need childcare, and be turning to strangers, or dragging your kid places kids shouldn’t be dragged to. You want to have adults you both know & trust (friends, family, colleagues, neighbors, parents of your kids friends, vetted professionals, etc.), plus a network of teenage sitters you can rely upon for short spells, as well as the organizations; daycare centers, camps, classes, school programs, etc. for both the short and long term. Whether it’s to go to work every day, or in the middle of the night. You need options. A lot of them. And you need them set up in advance. So that you aren’t googling “daycare” 20 minutes before work (or in the middle of the night when there’s an emergency) but have actually gone to preschools & found ones you liked, and applied, etc. (or have an adult you trust to come stay at your home, with no notice, at 3am, who actually answers their phone, and is willing/able).

It’s not like that “support system” just magically appears when you have a child. You have to actually go out and systematically create it. So that it’s there, ready and waiting, when you need it.

- “Someone to call when your SUDS is skyrocketing” , just like being a new parent (or in a new place), will probably start out with a giant whopping list population of ZERO. You don’t have anyone to call, because you haven’t needed anyone to call, until now. That’s normal. You’ll build a list of resources over time. And that list will get better -and easier!- over time as you get more used to building it.

 

[Survivor3]

I went through some unpleasant stuff in therapy yesterday. Today I've got flashbacks and horrible anxiety. I don't know who to call and yes it makes me more isolated. I only know a few people where I live and could only probably admit to one of my parents what is actually going on. It sucks.

 

[hopefully optimistic]

@Friday Thank you, thank you, thank you. Makes so much sense.

 

[hopefully optimistic]

I feel like I’m in this now and I’ve spent all morning trying to work out who or how to get help. I go full circle back to saying to myself I’m being dramatic and to get on with everything then round to the anxiety and fear of work and how I won’t cope and will be in a daze...I’m scared to contact my T cos it’s all fairly new relationship and I don’t know how she thinks on that but then a piece of me is so beyond caring that I just think do it! Instead I too isolate.

So sorry you’re also feeling this way. Please contact your T-if only just to ask how to handle such a situation...you don’t necessarily need to tell her that you’re currently in the situation if you’re not comfortable with that yet.

 

[Wendell_R]

I went for years afraid to contact anyone, including my past therapist. After my present therapist said she wanted me to contact her if I had big troubles, it was really hard to do because the contact seemed to make things worse. The first time I tried, I sent an email that she didn't see for a while. We talked about that later, and know I now that texting works best. I only text rarely, but I have practiced enough that I can do it.

You might want to do some "practice contacts" when your anxiety is a 5 or 6, just to learn how to do this.

Building up a non-therapist support network has been really hard. In addition to the PTSD, I have some young parts, and it's hard to share that with my friends. I have started to tell a select few friends that I have PTSD, so I will be able to tell them when my life gets overwhelming.

 

[whiteraven]

Yes, I have this problem. Mine stems from two things: having reached out in the past and been hurt in the process, and really not having a soul here I could call. I even worry about getting physically sick, because I don't have anyone I would feel safe calling.

I'm sorry you are needing to deal with this; it sounds like you are doing some good work, though.