For The People Who Live Alone.

[Loveneverfails]

I don't know how to compare my living alone to what yours will be like. It's different to lose someone you love let alone someone whose been your loving companion for so many years. But I do know that it's possible and that if anything, you're more prepared for it than most. You're strong and have the training for dealing with trauma. It will be difficult, no doubt about that. It was difficult for me and I was dealing with a fraction of what you are. I filled my days with social circles and movies and lots and lots of work, but in the end that just put off dealing with it. Essentially what I had to learn was how to love myself, to be my own companion, and it took years.

I'm sorry you have to deal with this and I can sympathize with how scary it is, but I do think you'll be able to thrive. Remember to love yourself, take time to protect and nurture your own heart too. Take care of you, that's as good a start as any.

 

[Sailorgal]

Gizmo,

The human spirit is amazing - never underestimate it. I met a woman who was 62 and had just lost her husband of 30+ years to cardiac arrest 8 months prior. She had to travel out of the country solo which was not planned. It was a huge ordeal.

They pretty much depended on each other literally for 30 years. I can't imagine....anyhow, we became close friends and one day she told me that she needed to push herself and move on. She confessed it was hard but that she had no choice. I gave her some references that I knew of and she hasn't stopped traveling since.

The point is being honest with yourself when you face your situation. But not use it to let yourself sink into a hole which is easy to do with PTSD. Build a support now. Maybe even start a new hobby whether it's scrapbooking or playing games online. Have your groups for bereavement and have others to just escape and enjoy your hobbies and interests.

Personally, I didn't want to talk to alot of people about the death, just focus on my future. It was awhile before I could. I didn't look at photos, etc. because I wasn't in a position to grieve - I had to work ASAP!

I hate to mention this, but planning head makes a difference as well. It's great to have your daughter handle some things so that you don't have to have your emotions running amuck all the time.