Forgiving ourselves...

[Princess Pearl]

@Princess Pearl This is a long hard process. For me, it has been simply looking at the...

Thankyou so much for your response, Vee. It’s really helped.
My daughter is going to the States where she’ll be able to get therapy appropriate for someone with Asperger’s. I belong to a Women’s Survivors of Abuse Group and it does help to be able to listen and offer insights.
You’ve inspired me to be more proactive with my guilt, too! Xxx

You did the best you could with what you had

Thankyou, Jewelz. Xxx

I try to tell myself that but it's so hard. What happened to me happened as an adult. It's hard to fo...

It’s hard, but we have to try, or the burden will destroy us. My daughter has mostly forgiven me so I have to try to forgive myself somehow! Xxx

@Princess Pearl This is a long hard process. For me, it has been simply looking at the...

Thankyou so much for your reply, ladee. I’m so, so sorry about your son. Your advice, though, is invaluable and makes such sense.... I shall try to follow it. I accept and return your hugs with pleasure! Thankyou!! Xxx

 

[SaharaSon]

I want to make a point of saying that sometimes our harshest critics are ourselves. I know that the person...

@Vee In addition to turning off the TV news I turn off the analysis of my problematic history for a while. My inner child needs a break to exist without focusing on the stressful times. Its analysis paralysis sometimes. I have to pull away just to lighten the load for a while. :tup:

 

[Princess Pearl]

I would like to be able to do that but I have a daughter who is so angry with me for my seeming complicity in the abuse, that it’s very hard to step away. She’s only 19 and I’m the only one she can direct her anger at, and I know, or at least hope, that she’ll forgive me one day, but it lays a massive burden on me and I can’t see how to forgive myself

 

[SaharaSon]

I would like to be able to do that but I have a daughter who is so angry with me for my seeming...

@Princess Pearl Your commitment to the welfare of daughter is admirable. I think over time she will realize that you were a victim too. Being a witness to trauma is traumatizing as well. Explain to her that witnessing trauma can cause paralysis itself. Trauma is paralyzing. The only thing I would add is make sure you enjoy life too. You were a victim too. Forgive yourself, and go have some fun. Work hard at enjoying life, it is your right. ;) Shalom.

 

[digger]

@Princess Pearl - please log in to your account to reply. Thanks.

 

[Vee]

I hope everyone is forgiving themselves out there and being kind to their inner selves. Hugs to you all!

 

[Jewelz742200]

I try to forgive myself

 

[Vee]

I try to forgive myself

Sometimes that's all you can do

 

[Jewelz742200]

Yes I know but when it happens I crash and burn

 

[Vee]

It's okay to crash and burn as long as you pick up the pieces and get back out on the road.

 

[Jewelz742200]

I do it’s so draining

I’m ok

 

[Vee]

So today I'm forgiving myself for being triggered... I spent the whole day in active shooter/run-hide-fight/disaster training. Ugh. What a day! I know it's for a good cause, and training helps save lives, but it was hard to think about for the entire day. I will admit, it's not something I ever dreamed I'd have to get trained for 15 years ago when I started in this career!