Games Trauma And A New Frame Of Mind

[Cinnamon4z]

So to start with, as i have said in my intro thread, I have been having a ton of trouble
with cars, driving, and even like walking - getting super paranoid & scared of being rear ended, side swiped, t boned or worse - since being rear ended last May. I get these intense spontaneous rages of fear and anxiety sometimes when i see cars in my rear view mirror or on my sides - especially if they are large vehicles, trucks or SUVs.

I used to really enjoy playing various racing games like Diddy Kong racing, Mario Kart, asphalt, and whole bunch of others. I would always used to prefer a more immersive first person experience and the thrill of speeding down the road through obstacles and flyin off ramps, smashing into opponents cars or blowing them up with rocket launchers & bananas. But since probably late August, I have not touched most of those games.
I recently came across a lifehack during my daily self-betterment perusal lifehacker mental-models-solve-problems-by-approaching-them-from-

I spoke with my therapist about the article and she said it may be worth trying to change my frame of mind and turning my driving experience into more of a game. As I walked back to my car after my appointment, still feeling a bit anxious having talked about my car accident a bit (twice actually that day), my legs kinda wobbly and weak, I finally made it to my car. I got in the driver seat and rested for a moment. Then I got out and walked around my car w/ one hand kinda resting on it for support. I felt the texture, and saw the color of my car window, sill, tires, trunk, doors, etc. As I got back to my driver seat I started to put together the game plan:
I was going to visualize in my mind driving in 3rd person. That lets me disassociate myself a bit from my anxieties and fears about accidents & driving. And the goal of the game is to get my teddy bear from point A to point B. I also mentally kinda picture the other vehicles, people and things as AI. This all requires intense focus, concentration and a lot of mental energy I found - especially in mentally recreating my space in 3rd person 3D.
I don't feel generally as anxious about driving when i do this. But it is really tiring. If i don't try to imagine myself in 3rd person, the objects in the mirrors become more pronounced and there isn't as much reduction in anxiety & fear.

I now understand that changing my frame of mind can be a very useful tool in giving me another perspective on my situation and alleviate my anxieties.
I still need to work on mastering the visualization and conquering my fears & anxieties though...

 

[darrenS]

Good luck and i truly hope you find a solution. I know from my own experience that i was forced to confront it , as my reactions were bordering on road rage and we all know where that ends - is there a small note or something you could put on on near your mirrors to help you stay focused and grounded.

 

[Ellabella44]

Good for you for not giving up, and trying to deal with this a new way. It may be tiring , but you found a way that driving again would be acceptable to you. I have not had your experience, but i think it sounds like an excellent place to start from. Having the goal be getting your bear from point a to point b. Wishing you luck with it!

 

[Friday]

One thing you might consider is taking an offensive driving course &/or stunt driving course. LOL... probably not right now. Maybe. But someday, for sure.

Offensive driving includes things like J-turns, how to ram other cars to break through roadblocks, how to drive steady while being rammed or half off the road, how to take over driving from someone else (alive or dead) while the car is in motion, etc. It's essentially driving while someone's trying to kill you.

Stunt driving, meanwhile, is far more about avoiding every other driver on the road (but also uses some of the flashier forms of offensive driving). It's puts the hypervig to serious work. Driving with stunt-drivers is super fun, because you can be actively trying to hit them... And it's like they're ghosts. In movies, when a car is driving backwards on the freeway? All those drivers are stunt drivers. They simply flow out of the way.

I already had PTSD, and was having a difficult time driving (trapped trapped trapped, get me out of here!!!) when my job meant that I had to deal with driving professionally... While people were trying to kill us. I usually refer to that time period as "bumper cars". At first, I was just the passenger or gunner, but I gradually took over driving duties. It was pee yourself terrifying at first. Literally. But after a few weeks, all the angles and trajectories n'stuff gave my hypervig a great big hug, and I got used to it. After a few months I returned home... And to my great surprise... Driving had become this über relaxing thing. Not only was no one actively trying to kill me, but for those idiots who are constantly on the road, creating near misses every day? I could see them, and glide my way around them. For traffic jams? I'm never trapped. I choose to be sitting in traffic. All I have to do to "get out" is nudge this car there, hit that axel here, puuuuuuuuuuush that axel there, pop the curb... And I'm on my way. Do I do it? No. It's not about actually doing it. It's about having egress, an escape avenue.

Again... My PTSD is not from an accident. What I'm saying about offensive/stunt driving may sound brilliant, or stupid, or terrifying, or just plain impossible. I'm not saying you "should" do this. Just that it's an option you might consider. It 100% changed the way I drive & feel while driving, because it changed every rule Od ever been taught about driving. And, instead of trying to avoid hypervig (exhausting), it puts the sucker to work.

 

[Cinnamon4z]

lol. @FridayJones
OMG that sounds like SSSOOOO much fun! Ok i will set this goal. oh man.
Do you know if you get like points and insurance discounts or something for learning stunt driving?
god i wanna so take that course....
please anxiety... please don't creep up on me so i can learn these safe and awesome stunt driving techniques