Good Days?

[cheetahspots]

Hey all,

Not sure if this is the exact right section as I am new here; if not I apologize.

My question is this.. When you are having a good day, is there any way to keep the feeling going? Whether it be for the next day or even longer? Example-- I've been feeling pretty good for the past few days. Surprisingly well, for me, especially at the end of a bad streak. Small things have been making me.. dare I say it... happy? The way my cats cuddle with me. The feeling of a nice hot shower or a good meal. But I'm also slightly afraid of this "even keel" feeling I've got. Like.. constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. At any moment I feel like I could lose this and I'll just go back to being sad or scared, and yet even if that doesn't happen, constantly anticipating bad times ahead is sabotaging the good feeling now.

I suppose I'm wondering firstly if anyone else ever feels like this, and secondly what other people do when this situation arises. Advice, anecdotes.. all are welcome.

-Cheetah

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I know this feeling.

For me the smartest thing I do during these days is make sure I keep the basics the same. Going to bed a few hours later is tempting by that might kill my good sleep cycle. Continue taking medication. The basics of my routine have to stay the same and then the feeling will, after practice (?) become a life style change.

The feeling is worse for me in the evening. All the crap of the day compounds in the evenings and that can kill all good feelings.

 

[Friday]

Ditto Ayesha. Keep doing what's working.

 

[holdenmonty]

It is tough but try to keep consistant and maybe even write down what makes you happy. I must admit I never thought about writing down what makes me happy when I'm doing good until just now when I typed it.

 

[Anarchy]

I've had a few really good weeks. There have been odd bad days and triggers, but not many.

I realized yesterday that I have great difficulty remembering how shit the bad feelings can be, or even what they consist of.

The dissociative/amnesic barriers in my brain are keeping all of that well hidden from me.

@Ayesha, thanks for the reminder not to forget about good self care.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Live in the moment. That's sort of the crux of ptsd treatment.

 

[Chava]

Fearing the happy will go away is exactly what crushes the moment. I'm much more even, not big highs or lows (or more like not big highs and not meltdowns all the time). But I used to chase feeling good all the time. Well, I just don't feel good all the time. But it helps a lot to just have simple things I enjoy and that keep me focused on the present, like going for walks, artwork, reading. Probably you won't feel happy constantly, but I relate to the fear of crashing. Just keep doing the basics, like others have said, and let yourself keep doing simple things you enjoy, whatever they are.

 

[The Albatross]

I found I tended to focus more on the difficult/hard/bad days than the neutral or "good" ones. So I tracked them on a calendar and identified the cycle. Each day I would put a plus/minus symbol or a zero on the calendar. Plus was "good", zero was neutral neither good nor bad, and minus was a bad/difficult/reactive day. I did this for a couple years.

The first thing I learned is that I had a cycle of sorts (more often than not but not always because of unexpected events/triggers etc.). The second thing I learned was that my mind magnified the bad/reactive/negative days and downplayed the neutral or good ones. When looking at certain days on my calendar and rereading my journal posts about what happened that particular day... I could then draw some conclusions that were much more accurate than the impressions or "feelings" my brain was giving me to base my self care and maintenance on. So then I did a boatload of goal/challenges of 30 days to create new healthier habits or coping stuff... then some 6 month and one year ones so that the habits would become behaviors.

In the process of all that... I began to notice longer periods of neutral or good days... and greater distances between depressive or reactive PTSD cycling.

I have certain core things I do each morning and tend to be disciplined about them now. Throughout the day, I have a tool kit with some go to coping skills for additional stresses, relaxation techniques, even prayer to use to manage. At the end of the day/evening, I do a brief review about my day. What went well? What didn't? What or where was there an opportunity for me to manage better? Then like the old song lyric... "I get up and do it again."