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Happiness Challenge Round 2 May 7th

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I started doing this privately, as I knew that at some point I would fail, and didn't want to do so publicly. But, as Albatross so aptly pointed out in my journal, perfectionism is an issue for me. Who cares if I fail? We are here to help and support one another.

I really appreciate this challenge. It is helping to pull me out of a serious slump. So thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I can't say it enough.

Good things: 1. I appreciate ibuprofen and caffeine and antibiotics. I really, really do. 2. My supervisor at work is great. She loves the students and really does a great job caring for them. 3. I DIDN'T come home from work and sleep today. I got something done instead. 4. I appreciate the men who come and pick up my garbage. I wish I could throw some emotional garbage in there, too. 5. I appreciate my neighbor, who treats my children, my husband and I as you would expect a loving parent (or grandparent) to treat us. What a gift! 6. My cats. Oh I LOVE them.

Random act of kindness: Tried to make a very unsettled observing college student feel at ease. Tried very hard to deal very kindly with a very spoiled tantrum throwing child. I am trying to see the child as broken because he/she is not yet equipped to deal with even trivial matters that don't go his/her way. And this can be a real handicap.

Not finished with my day, so still working on some things.
 
It's very tough right now. (Fighting the depression. - But my therapist says it's grief too.. And that if my life wasn't so difficult and I had "the room to break down" I would probably not feel as overwhelmed and have to fight the depression.)

1) Three new things you are grateful for today : I'm grateful for my coffeemaker(I can't survive without the morning-cup, that the tensions in my body wasn't so bad today, that the rain didn't come until I had come home again(I had to go to town, to see my therapist)
2) a positive experience in the last 24 hours: I managed to write the letter to the district court I needed to write(at least a draft) to try to appeal against the rejection of my application(to a state agency). I'm not confident in sending it: I'm thinking about re-writing it. But at least I started.
3) Exercise : Yoga(25 minutes; and today my body allowed me to do even advanced poses: that's a rare occasion.. :) ), and then a walk(45 minutes)
4) Meditation : None. Yet. I managed to find the time this morning, but then I just cried.. (But managed to pick my self up and go and write that letter instead..)
5.) A random act of kindness: I hold up the door for a mum carrying her young, very tired son.
 
I did all 5 things.

Positive moment was taking my PTSD Service Dog to the vet and having her get a clean bill of health, also coming in $10 under budget! She got all her shots and everything that was needed. Also 6 months of heart worm and flea and tick preventative.

Exercise, I love marching in place while waiting for things to boil, etc. I get winded, so I know I am getting "somewhere".

4. In meditationg I came to realize that without peace, there is no building of things or relationships. With peace there is. I read about king Solomon and how his father David was unable to build the Temple, because he was at war with a lot of surrounding countries. King Solomon made peace, and so he was able to have it built. He traded wheat and olive oil with and neighboring king for the timber needed. He also got some workers from that neighboring king. PEACE IS KING. (This story is from the Book of 1st Kings in the Bible, Old Testament.

5. Kindness was to suggest to a neighbor who is allergic to the sun that we exercise inside with my lady's weights. She got sun poisoning a week and a half ago when we were walking outside at 6:30 in the evening. I felt so bad! But we need to exercise and working together is productive and helpful. She has not replied yet; we shall see!
 
I am bouncing back and forth between this and private conversation - but I don't think anyone else is obligated to!

But I actually fell asleep- sitting up!
My meditation teacher addressed this the very first class I did with her. She said "And if you fall asleep then you know... you need to sleep!" No worries. If you are over tired and meditating well - you fall asleep. Nice Work, zaniara!

Who cares if I fail?
Just to be clear - the ONLY way to Fail is to give up. The very intention to attempt is a success. Any actual follow through is MORE success. So, as long as you have the intention, Failure Is Impossible. Really. As a recovering perfectionist myself, I often assign students who are fighting perfectionism to write at least three false things in their homework. Their assignment is modified in that I require them to write things that are WRONG. Curiously enough this works. They have a heck of a time with it at first, but eventually when the earth does not swallow them up and they don't get hit by lightning they seem to be able to loosen up a bit - at least with the homework! I can only hope it carries over.:) SO, dear a3a2, should you find yourself racking up a troubling large set of perfect scores on this challenge you might want to skip something. Just to avoid being Perfect!

My reading in the Happiness Advantage today taught me this. He talks about the metaphor of a lever - the power of a lever is determined by it's length and the relative position of the thing to be lifted and the fulcrum. In the case of people and doing stuff the fulcrum in this metaphor is our attitude or belief about the possibility of success. Specifically, if we believe we CAN change/succeed we are VASTLY more likely to do so.

We did such a great job the last 21 days, I think we will all do swimmingly this time too!
 
Day 2 West Coast I made it through. Better control on the anxiety level. I am around a lot of unintentional million taskers. I know it is not me but it is hard to think straight at times.

I shared my lunch with someone today! The servings are huge.

I am grateful for my cell phone we just had a power spike blow out the power.

Great to see everyone challenging onward!
Hugs, Whitney :hug:
 
2: (I forgot about this one, so it's late)

Around 4pm my boyfriend called me to invite me over to his house to watch a movie. Our school-year routine is that he comes over to my house so that I can grade papers, etc. while we watch something. I didn't feel good when he called; my anxiety was such that I couldn't even make a simple decision of yes or no. He said to think about it and he'd call back. During the interim I tried to weigh how I should handle things. I decided to stay home but worried he would feel rejected. When he called back, I explained that I felt like I had to accomplish a few things and that I was progressing so s-l-o-w-l-y. He completely understood. He knows I've been off my Mirtazapin and trying to push through this 3-month depressive spell.

He was just lovely about everything. He came over later and we watched a couple of our shows.
 
Day 3:

1A: I'm grateful that it appears the vitamins are really helping. I've been on them for about a week, and I'm beginning to see some results.

B: I'm grateful that my PMS is offiicially over. Maybe now my concentration level will be better.

C: I'm grateful that I had the foresight to check my budget before going out to Goodwill -- I realized that, nope, I better not go shopping until next pay period. (Take that! emotional spending! :stop: You'll not get the best of me this time 'round.)
 
I did my exercise plus a little extra. (I can't do the whole quad routine yet - but I did half!)
I also exercised by weed wacking for a while!

I am grateful for nice cool breeze.
I am grateful for my coffee shop.
I am grateful for summer.

My good memory for today will be kicking the ball for my dog. She SO loves this game!

I didn't manage an act of kindness today - but I did send my mom a mother's day plant this AM. So I just need to do a little meditation today.

My reading today covered something I think we already "get" but is worth repeating - having other people who believe in us, and who see our efforts as meaningful REALLY HELPS us to find a way to achieve our objectives. I know this is true.
 
May 8th Day 14 (Day 2 for round 2)

1. Three new things you are grateful for today :beautiful weather, having energy, having spaghetti for breakfast!
2. Journal about a positive experience in the last 24 hours : my second son expression his gratefulness for listening to him and giving him advice with his separation
3. Exercise :long walk
4. Meditation :on the Angelic world
5. A random act of kindness :made a surprise visite where my eldest son got a contract to build a house not far from my place. He was hoping to have at least one contract but got 2. The other house is in a rich section of the city and is worth $$$$. So this gives his company a great start after striving for over a year.
 
I really want to comment your postings, but I'm just so exhausted, I just can't. But I will come back and read more another day.

1) Grateful for: that I felt a bit more calmness inside today, that my oldest son is such a sweet and wonderful big brother to his little sister(it makes my heart ache every time I see him smile that sweet smile and be so sweet to her), for the fact that my friend told me to stop my "stinking thinking"(and I was able to listen).

2) Positive experience: laughing and talking with my oldest kids for hours, about both serious stuff and not so serious stuff. And also being off the white sugar for the second day in a row(I need to get off it), and the craving has lessened some.

3) Meditated: read my daily texts, and prayed, but I ended up crying when I tried to meditate

No exercise today; I couldn't find the time/space.

4) Random act of kindness; I chatted some with and expressed some warmth to the cashier at the local food store. (I'm not sure she appreciated it, but at least I tried..) :O_o:
 
May 9th Day 15 (Day 3 round 2)
1. Three new things you are grateful for today :rain, sweet smell of the forest after the rainfall, my afternoon nap
2. Journal about a positive experience in the last 24 hours : I finally finished my third and forth documents for the 3rd workshop. Going to have it proof read by a friend.
3. Exercise :gentle streaches, I have a nagging pain on my left side.
4. Meditation : on the trees while the rain was falling - wow it's so weird what we can «see»
5. A random act of kindness : said hello to an elderly man who seemed very lonely.
 
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