Have started Auvelity - is there hope?

[Ciaobella]

Hello, I have not been on any anti depressants in years. I have PTSD anxiety and insomnia I was in coma and I have endured major traumatic events. I take Xanax, ambien and amptripline (not for depression for my stomach) all my worries and stress goes to my stomach. Today I was prescibed Auvelity. Due to the last 4 years I’m lost I can’t leave my house. I isolate I have 3 grown sons. I’m so broken inside and they wanted to do ketimine but I am a very high demanding job as a Treasure Accountant thankfully i work remote. The doc said to take 1 for 3 days and go to two. One in morning and one 7-8 hours later I’m not familiar with all the words your using but I really could use some help with advice. It started at a young age 5 hit by a car, at 19 years old and was thrown from a windshield and in coma for 3 months, hit by a drunk driver in 2009, cancer twice, toxic relationship who violated my physically, fell down 3 flights of stairs at a job in 2020, another traumatic accident in 2022 to then violated body and robbed. I have been on at least 8 different kinds of antidepressants at a young age till I was in my early 30 I stopped taking everything. Nothing worked I tried to take my life in 2016 I have never had suicidal thoughts but the place I was sent made me more traumatized I didn’t belong thereI just have lived a harmful life of almost dying from car accidents, hit by a car, shot at, robbed, raising 3 boys I’m 48 single mother who life I have lived for them and work no work life balance. I have no one but then and that’s my choice my family doesn’t understand me. They are Italian and from Italy and just thinks I can rewire and get over it. Is there any hope left by me starting this medication because I’m at my lowest I’ve ever been.

 

[Flossy]

Hello, I have not been on any anti depressants in years. I have PTSD anxiety and insomnia I was in coma and I have endured major traumatic events. I take Xanax, ambien and amptripline (not for depression for my stomach) all my worries and stress goes to my stomach. Today I was prescibed Auvelity. Due to the last 4 years I’m lost I can’t leave my house. I isolate I have 3 grown sons. I’m so broken inside and they wanted to do ketimine but I am a very high demanding job as a Treasure Accountant thankfully i work remote. The doc said to take 1 for 3 days and go to two. One in morning and one 7-8 hours later I’m not familiar with all the words your using but I really could use some help with advice. It started at a young age 5 hit by a car, at 19 years old and was thrown from a windshield and in coma for 3 months, hit by a drunk driver in 2009, cancer twice, toxic relationship who violated my physically, fell down 3 flights of stairs at a job in 2020, another traumatic accident in 2022 to then violated body and robbed. I have been on at least 8 different kinds of antidepressants at a young age till I was in my early 30 I stopped taking everything. Nothing worked I tried to take my life in 2016 I have never had suicidal thoughts but the place I was sent made me more traumatized I didn’t belong thereI just have lived a harmful life of almost dying from car accidents, hit by a car, shot at, robbed, raising 3 boys I’m 48 single mother who life I have lived for them and work no work life balance. I have no one but then and that’s my choice my family doesn’t understand me. They are Italian and from Italy and just thinks I can rewire and get over it. Is there any hope left by me starting this medication because I’m at my lowest I’ve ever been.

There is hope. Keep trying different ones. Keep a written record of how you feel and your reactions, even if it means writing on the wall with chalk. Then take that record to your doctor and analyse it for yourself as well. When it is in writing in front of yourself like a nursing chart you can take a step back and see the evidence of whether something is helping or not.

I am so sorry nobody has responded in days to your post. I hope this helps.

Listen to your doc and help them by keeping good records of the date...the medication....the physical feelings.......appetite.....sleep.....
Mental wellbeing. A journal book is even good to write in or Notes on your phone. Whichever you find most convenient and at hand. If you need to write it on the wall then take a moment at night before sleep to transfer it to your record chart. You an even get little index cards to write on at most newsagents.

I think Your doc sounds sensible.

All my stress goes to my stomach also. The ONE thing that hellped me with this is a thing I used to do to unclench the scphincter muscles in my gut. I would get in the shower, bend forward, open my mouth wide and do a scream without making a noise. I would do it in stages and eventually I would either yawn or burp. That was the sign for me that the scphincter muscles had relaxed and opened. I am so grateful that you have now reminded me to start doing that again. It helps me so much. I was told and I also beleive myself that gut problems are due to not feeling safe to speak up for yourself. My biggest fear has always been that one day I will open my mouth and tell everyone what I really think and the men in white coats will take me away forever, but now at the age of 70 (still cute) I say what I think but i have learned to depersonalise it and I seem to get away with it.

I also watch things on Youtube like The Shitty Childhood Fairy and heaps and heaps of training videos on Narcissistic Parents and the damage they do to us. My favourite wonderful Psych is Dr Ramani. Please start a lovely habit of watching one of her videos in bed and make your bed the softest safest place it can be. Great sheets and pillows. Lighting for reading. Aircon or fan. Fresh air. A flower now and then. Light perfume. Your comfy jamies. best wishes.

DoctorRamani

Your #1 source of guidance about healing from narcissistic relationships. DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

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PS I take Pristiq the last 15 years. It works best for me. Its and SNRI.