Having si today

[Deleted member 12723]

I just need a few people to tell me the reasons that life is worth living. I am really hanging on by a very slender thread and plan to call a hotline. I cannot go to the hospital because i have no money to come up with a five hundred dollar co pay and I am being reduced on the Effexor.

Just cannot take it anymore.

 

[Muted]

Hang in there @Rain ! I promise that it will pass. SI sucks to go through, but you can do this. Take 10 min at a time and just focus on that if you can.

If you need to go to the hospital, go, because your life is worth it!!

 

[Muted]

Life is worth living because, tomorrow is a new day!

 

[Bristol]

:hug: Thinking of you @Rain we would all be lost without you

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I have been estranged from my only daughter and my two grandchildren for the last year. It is a very long story.

Today I have reached the end of my rope. I have been messed up my entire life and have been in years and years of therapy but mostly had bad therapists who did not really help me.

I am back in therapy and coming to the realization that I really hurt my daughter so bad but I do not why she is so against me. She never told me why she hates me so much.

I am under the confusing waves of realizing that I am responsible in a way that I am not aware of. I was in therapy trying to get help for all of us and got my kids into therapy and tried to turn things healthier but she wants nothing more to do with me and keeps the grandkids away from me and I cannot take it anymore.

Please help and I will answer any questions you have. Thank you. I am pretty desperate.

 

[Muted]

Have you asked your daughter why she feels that way @Rain? It’s hard to be responsible or work through it if you don’t understand why she is doing this.
My daughter has a lot of anger about the past also, but I can’t fix the past I can only try and be healthier for now and the future. She hangs onto her anger. It’s been hard for me to quit allowing her to continuously beat me up for it.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I promise that it will pass. SI sucks to go through, but you can do this.

Life is worth living because, tomorrow is a new day!

Thinking of you @Rain we would all be lost without you

Thank you all of you. I just feel like I can't go on anymore and I feel as i as I am a fraud and do not want to be the strong one anymore. I know I need help right now and feel like I am just trying to get attention. I know that this is not what I am doing the inner critic is being very ruthless right now.

 

[Sideways]

Stick with it. There are dark times, like now. You’re low on your meds which is amplifying everything. The situation with your daughter isn’t fixed, it will keep changing. You have made progress in your therapy, and you mean way too much to too many people to give up.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Have you asked your daughter why she feels that way @Rain? I

She hangs onto her anger. It’s been hard for me to quit allowing her to continuously beat me up for it.

My daughter falsely accused me of molesting my younger grandaugter twelve years ago as an infant and refused to listen to me. Yet for twelve years she has been really close with me and been silent and has been so very generous in me having the kids over until just last year at which point she cut me off and cut the grandkids that i love so much off from me.

I think that she is angry about other things that she has not told me about. She never did this to me before. She has been with a new man who once put a gun to my oldest grandchild and I called the police and my grandchild lied to protect my daugher.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

You have made progress in your therapy, and you mean way too much to too many people to give up.

Thank you, I am glad i made this thread asking for help today. Thank you for reminding me that this is a process that will change. It is hard to try to hang onto. I just do not want to be strong anymore.

 

[Muted]

and do not want to be the strong one anymore. I know I need help right now

@Rain thats why were here. Not everyone can be strong all of the time. It’s ok to need help and need encouragement. I think even though you felt that way, you’re posting was courageous. I also think your in tune with yourself and showed assertiveness by asking for exactly what you need.

Wether your daughter realizes it or not right now, she does need a Mom and the healthier you can be for her the better she will be able to be. She will see the changes in you and eventually I hope she will allow your granddaughters to spend time with you, because they need that too.

 

[Muted]

She never did this to me before. She has been with a new man who once put a gun to my oldest grandchild and I called the police and my grandchild lied to protect my daugher.

Is she still with him?