Relationship He Is Starting To Instigate Contact

[discarded]

As a few of you know, I left my PTSD husband nearly 4 months ago. We had been on a steady downhill trend for quite a while and things had gotten really bad. I have maintained contact with him because of our 11 year old daughter who lives with me, (and of course because I worry about him). Any contact up until the last week has been instigated by me and generally not welcomed unless only about our daughter.

Now out of the blue, he has made contact everyday for the past week and actually asked how I am. I have maintained my distance during these calls, letting him control the conversation and where it leads and when it ends. I don't know what the sudden change is about and I won't be getting my hopes up that it will last either. I dare not ask for any reasons as I feel this will lead to him withdrawing his communication again.

Has anyone else out there been in this situation? Did the communication last?

 

[Bilby]

I don't know how I missed this post! I am so sorry!

How are things going now?

B x

 

[discarded]

Things are all over the place Bilby. He is really trying to make an effort it would seem but I know he is really stressed out and it won't take much for him to withdraw again. I just hope we can all make it through Christmas without too many dramas and complications.

 

[Bilby]

That's a good thing that he is making an effort :)

Good luck for Christmas!

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Good for you for taking care of yourself. Who knows why he is contacting you. Maintain firm boundries with him. You have been through so much hell because of him. I would not trust what is going on if I was you. It could be the holidays.

Keep on taking good care of you and your child. Keep on building a new life for yourself. Without him. He needs to be in therapy and taking meds to stabalize. Wait until you see some some substantial changes in him.

You are not his doormat or his booty call or his comfort when he needs it. Keep your boundries firm. I feel for you. But I remember when you first you began talking about what he did to you. There has to be real changes on his part first. Please take it slow and be careful and be safe. Hugs. Just my opionion.

 

[discarded]

Thanks Gizmo. I am treading very wearily. I will have a lot of trust issues for a long time to come. I just want to get through Christmas as best I can. In the new year I will be starting property settlement, purely because I need the financial support it will bring. I am really struggling financially while he seems to be spending it up. I am also hoping it will be bring me some closure to our relationship. 4 months now since I left him and pretty sure he has done nothing about treatment. Merry Christmas!!!