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Hello Everyone - My Wife Was Raped

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Hi Tarheelman
I understand your wife's trauma, and the interest in EMDR. You may also want to try and seek out a therapist for some "bodywork" - haokomi or redenfeld methods seem to help a great deal. The sessions can be quite exhausing as they help to release the pent up trauma and anxiety from our experiences.....best wishes to your wife....and to you as well. I am fortunate to have a partner that loves and supports me - be kind, gentle and patient...there is no timeline for recovery and she will experience the rollercoaster ride. It is a part of the healing.
 
Things have slid downward since I last posted. She has gotten increasingly despondent, where she actually made an attempt to take her life almost two weeks ago. We promptly got her into a local psych hospital here in Raleigh, thinking that she would get straightened out, and back on track. We were even scheduled for an appointment with an EFT therapist the day after she made the attempt... She is still in there now.

The problem I have is the fact that she seems to be getting worse, not better, while in there. She has been put on all sorts of medication, constantly changing, and it's to the point that I'm thinking, OK, can we just let the therapist come in there and see if she can help her out. The social worker at the hospital tells me that she doesn't think it would be a good idea for my wife to have therapy at this time, because they're still trying to regulate her medication. They've had almost 2 weeks to regulate her medication, and she's gotten worse, not better. She told me on the phone that she started hearing voices, having an increase in the racing thoughts and suicidal ideation. What got me was that one day, the doctor tells her she's "unipolar" (whatever that means), and the next day, because of hearing voices and having vivid nightmares where she sees the rapist, now she's bipolar"

I am beyond frustrated with this place right now, I could scream.
 
The reason she hears voices, has increased suicidal ideation, etc etc, is because of the medication. Doctors are idiots... sorry to say, but they are. They get a person, give them medication, then forget about the side effects the medication causes to people uniquely. These very side effects are common from medications given to any person with PTSD. Take away the medications, you then have withdrawals which makes a person worst again for a couple of months, to suddenly have lesser symptomatic issues. Funny that!!!
 
I'm going to try and get her out of there this week. My mother in law has volunteered to come and stay in our house when we get her home, to watch over her and help out, and we're gonna go see an EFT therapist as soon as we can. I'm hoping I don't have too much of a problem with this.
 
This is frustrating beyond belief... They won't release her, because her meds haven't stabilized. I asked if I could have the EFT therapist come in and visit with her, to help with the PTSD and they tell me that my wife wouldn't respond to it because of the state she's in. I am really starting to think that they're scared she'll get better and won't need all the meds they've been shoving down her throat... The doctor actually said this morning that ECT might be an option to look into... If I had been in his presence, they might have thrown me into the hospital as well, after beating the piss out of him.
 
Your starting to see my point yourself then... doctors are idiots, and they do nothing themselves anymore, instead opt to just shove medication after medication down a patients throat, then wonder why a person doesn't get better. There fix... increase the dosage and become dependent upon a drug instead of fixing the core root of the problem. A little medication is good initially if a person isn't coping, which most don't when they first discover the worst PTSD has to offer... but if a person gets immediately into one or two maximum medications, they become quite functional to then get stuck into the hard work of looking at their trauma. Yes, that will make a person very sick, like the medication isn't working or something, but it is, hence why you medicate a person slightly then hit trauma head on. Once the worst of the repercussions are over, you then decrease the meds and withdraw from them. Another rough ride for a couple of months. A person then stabilizes and often will become much clearer to then continue focusing on going forward in their healing, then after a year of healing, focus on learning management strategies to cope in life with PTSD and not allow it to affect a person daily.
 
Yeah, it absolutely blows... Even the "therapy" they provide at the hospital is crap. Everyone there is for a variety of reasons, so "therapy" involves some idiot social worker gabbing on about nothing, and going around the room asking people questions. They have a session on Wednesday evenings before visitation, where family members are invited to attend. I almost lost it when this dolt actually encouraged people to ask their doctors about Electroconvulsive Therapy.

I'm researching legal ways to allow my wife to receive some alternative therapy. They seem to bristle at my suggestion to have the therapist we were going to see come in and see if she could help her. "We don't really allow outsiders to come in and treat patients", the doctor told me. I'm like, "Dude, she's been here almost two weeks, and has made ZERO progress... If anything, she's gotten worse since you guys started shoving drugs down her throat."
 
hey tarheelman, you just keep at it, doing what you know is right no matter how much they bristle. sounds like you have extended family there, so hopefully you can find a way to get around the situation there and really help your wife...we're all thinking of you and behind you all the way.
 
hello

Your wife is a very lucky woman to have someone so supportive. I hope things start to improve for the both of you. Take Care.
 
feel for you

I have a similar past, I ended up in the hospital because it all became too much, all the flashbacks and panic attacks and trying to keep it all together. I lost it and tried to commit suicide. That was almost a year ago. Things will get better but you can't rush it, because as you go through therapy the PTSD will cause you to go up and down, I have great days, making progress then one thing happens and it is off to the races, nightmares, panic all that comes back. then I just have to remember my coping mechanisms and use those. I know someone that uses EMDR therapy but in conjuction with other therepies not just alone.

I too have kids, 8 year old boy and 2 year old girl. My 8 year old started having trouble at school about the same time I was having trouble so we have had to work through that too.
 
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