How do I tell my parents that I need to move away from home?

[Theasylumsystem]

I hate to feel this way, but this town holds so much damn pain for me. I love the family I've found so much. I really do. I wouldn't change my mom or dad for the world, but I just can't live in this town anymore. My bio mom still lives here. I've been no-contact with her for several years now, but it makes me anxious about the possibility of seeing her around town. This damn place has so many bad memories, too. I've already been applying to a bunch of jobs in a town two hours away. How do I tell my mom that this town makes me want to off myself without hurting her feelings? I love my mom and dad so much. I'm scared to go without them, and I feel like I owe them for all they've done for me, but at the same time, I just want to get **out** of here. I feel so depressed and like I'm stuck here. I don't want to die in this place, and I used to think I would when I was a kid.

 

[Movingforward10]

By saying something similar to what you have said above? That you want to move to another town, and are looking for jobs in that town to be able to do that, as you need a break from this town and what it represents.

What's making you think you will hurt your parents feelings if you move 2 hours away?

It's a very normal thing to do.

 

[Theasylumsystem]

By saying something similar to what you have said above? That you want to move to another town, and are looking for jobs in that town to be able to do that, as you need a break from this town and what it represents.

What's making you think you will hurt your parents feelings if you move 2 hours away?

It's a very normal thing to do.

I don't really know. I just know that they were there for me at my lowest point. They chose and adopted an adult disabled man and literally paid for everything I needed for three years when I couldn't work. I feel like if I move away it's like spitting in their face and all they've done for me...

 

[Freemartin]

I can also see a scenario where they would be immensely proud of you and congratulate themselves for creating enough safety and other good stuff that you’re now able to take next steps in your life.

Wouldn’t it be kinda the ideal outcome? They find you in a bad shape, they invite you to live with them and take care of you when you’re at a low point in your life and then, when you’ve grown stronger you’re able to make your own choices and start building your own life.

 

[Movingforward10]

I second what @Freemartin says.

If they haven't given you any signs that they would be upset, which it sounds like they haven't, then it sounds like it's more a belief of yours rather than fact.

It would be the ultimate "thank you for helping me" to be able to live independently and make decisions about your life. It would show that what they did , worked.
Do you feel able to talk to them about all of this and your worry that they will be upset?

 

[Theasylumsystem]

I can also see a scenario where they would be immensely proud of you and congratulate themselves for creating enough safety and other good stuff that you’re now able to take next steps in your life.

Wouldn’t it be kinda the ideal outcome? They find you in a bad shape, they invite you to live with them and take care of you when you’re at a low point in your life and then, when you’ve grown stronger you’re able to make your own choices and start building your own life.

I second what @Freemartin says.

If they haven't given you any signs that they would be upset, which it sounds like they haven't, then it sounds like it's more a belief of yours rather than fact.

It would be the ultimate "thank you for helping me" to be able to live independently and make decisions about your life. It would show that what they did , worked.
Do you feel able to talk to them about all of this and your worry that they will be upset?

Thank you both. I think you're right. I'm just always worried about any type of confrontation. I don't want it to sound like I don't love them with all of my heart either because I definitely do. The city I'm moving to I'll be sharing an apartment building with my best friend so it's not like I'll be **alone** alone, you know what I mean? I'm just nervous I guess. Thanks again for the kind and helpful words <3