How To Cope Seeing A Dr About 'private' Issues?

[Rumors]

Maybe you could ask your Therapist for a reference to a doctor that deals with patients who have been through sexual abuse? They could possibly spend a little extra time and potentially ease the tension and stress of being there. Another possibility would be for your T to call on your behalf and update the doctor.

I am sorry you have that anxiety. I can sympathize as I do the same thing! It is not easy but just know you have loads of support here! Good luck!

 

[kers]

My guess would be that the doctor might be willing to do medication management immediately while helping you work up to the reality of an exam. Remember that you can see a doctor and decline, or stop, a physical exam at any time--it really does sound like a hormone/meds issue, but the doctor needs to talk to you in order to decide what to do.

Would it help to list some things that might make the exam a little bit less terrifying? I have been working on some of my own, like: talk to me about what will happen before the exam, while I am still clothed; explain each step and ask my permission before you touch anything; ask, periodically, if it is okay for you to continue; and allow me to get dressed before we discuss anything following the exam. I have been trying to figure out what would help me feel marginally more in control during something scary.

 

[KP the nut]

What sort of essential oils are good to use? I haven't really looked into anything like that yet, but I know when I burn my sandalwood incense, that makes me feel calm.

Have a look at this thread

[DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/aromatherapy-that-may-help-relieve-some-ptsd-symptoms.13571/[/DLMURL]

I use lemon oil to help keep me grounded but ask in the thread and I know Amethist will have some good ideas of what to use.

Please though, get it checked, there are some good ideas above. Looking back on things I've been terrified of I've found that the fear of doing it was far worse than the thing itself.

We'll all come with you if it would help :hug:

 

[anonymous]

Thank you Rumours, that is a good idea. She also gave me this card to keep on me at all times, it really is a great idea. You simply hand the card to the person you are seeing( there are specific ones for Dentist, airport security etc, or there is a general one) which says something along the lines of I have been traumatised/sexually abused and would prefer to see a female, would like to be told what you are doing at each step etc. Obviously written more eloquently than that, but I am not functioning so well right now. I think seeing a Dr that has more experience with sexual abuse might be a good idea.

Kers, I still have not seen the Dr but symptoms are getting worse. I have made an appointment for Wednesday. I know I need to get this sorted. I just have to. And I think I will be firm and say that I want to try medication or blood tests etc first before any examination takes place. My T firmyl believes it is just a hormone imbalance, and taking medication to correct this won't harm me if it turns out not to be that. She also gave me the names of some natural products I can try, again, they won't hurt me if it turns out it isn't hormonal. And yes, that is a good idea to list some things that would help it be less scary. I would need to write it down and hand it to the Dr, because I can tell I would just go silent or dissociate.

Thanks KP the nut, I will have a look at that thread shortly! I do struggle with keeping myself grounded or getting myself grounded, so the lemon oil sounds like it may be a good idea. I will have a read through that thread for more info.

Thanks for all your ideas and suggestions, I am absolutely terrified at the thought of going to see the Dr on Wednesday, but I know it needs to be done...

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I really wish they made those cards saying I wish to see a *male* doctor as I have been abused, but I would probably be seen as some sort of nympho given the dominant stereotype that abused women hate males.

And I realize this is probably just another defense mechanism, but taking MEDICAL advice from your therapist is uhm, let's just say not in your best interest. She has not been to medical school or even to an alternative healing school in all likelihood. This is a serious issue and you're willing to throw a few herbs at it when it could be something much much worse? Yes, it may be hormonal, but what if it's hormonal because your body has cysts or tumors. Those are checked for with an ultrasound (external and internal, yes I've had it done).

I'm really not trying to be rude, but I see you throwing up all sorts of road blocks, even saying "that's not my therapists job" when given the suggestion that she go with you. Did you even ask her? No, I didn't think so.

I wish you the best, and yes I realize that PTSD plays a huge part in why you're not getting help, but I see you as making excuses and not taking advantage of possible help that is out there for you when you have what may be a serious medical problem. Remember Steve Jobs? He could (obviously) afford the best medical care in the world but thought he could cure one of the deadliest types of cancer via nutrition...then it was too late. Yes, a bit different than your case, but my point is that it's your mind that is getting in the way of getting the care you need. And no, not your triggered PTSD mind, rather your rational thinking mind.

 

[Rumors]

SOL, her T was a nurse. That was in the very first post. However, I agree that it is important to be checked by her doctor. I don't see her as making excuses as much as trying to find options that are comfortable for her.

Keep the faith and keep exploring options!

 

[anonymous]

Scared of Lonely, I'm sure you could type up your own cards stating you wish to see a male Dr etc. There are examples on other sexual abuse websites that I have found. Not sure if you are allowed to put links to other sites in here, but I'm sure you would be able to find what you need through a google search.

I did find what you said quite rude. My T is a registered nurse(as pointed out in the first post), a registered Psychologist and she DOES have some sort of training in natural therapies, but I cannot tell you what they are as I have only seen her for psychological therapy. But I do know she has some sort of training in that area. It's not just a matter of 'throwing a few herbs at it', it's doing whatever can possibly help me, to reduce the symptoms. If it was normal, chemical medication she was suggesting, no, I wouldn't go and take them. But natural, herbal remedies can't hurt you if the problem is not hormonal. I went to the health food shop yesterday and bought some supplements, and again was told that these things would not hurt me if it turns out my hormones are fine (I didn't tell the sales lady what was wrong, just that I thought I had a hormone imbalance) And as mentioned in the last post, I have a Dr's appointment for Wednesday.

I have not asked her to come with me to the Dr's because she is a T, I would have thought her job is not to accompany me to such appointments. I have rarely heard of other psychologist's doing this.

As for 'making excuses', I have always used avoidence as a coping mechanism. I avoid any situations that are associated with the trauma, whether it be people, places, situations or even my own body. Avoidance is a symptom of PTSD, it is in the criteria for being diagnosed with PTSD. I can think logically about why I should go to the Dr's, I can list all the reasons why I should go to the Dr's, but when that wave of fear takes over, all that rationality is lost. I really don't think you are qualified to say whether or not this is related to my PTSD anyway. I believe it is.

Thank you Rumours for your support. As mentioned earlier, I do indeed have an appointment with my Dr, tomorrow. I am going to take on the suggestions of those above. My T has confirmed that she has spoken to my Dr and has told her what is happening, so I don't have to go in there and try and explain it, because I know I will freeze. I am presuming they will take some blood tests and possibly prescribe some medication. I will insist on blood tests first before physical examination.

I am feeling ok about it today. I am not too nervous, yet. I will let you all know what happens with the Dr tomorrow. Thank you all again for the support, this is very hard and embarassing for me :(

 

[Springer80]

A big good luck for tomorrow...Its sounds like you have a solid plan for getting through it. You can confirm with your doctor that they understood your therapists advice and then go for the blood test etc and perhaps discuss what could be arranged with them in the future if any physical exam was required. It would be a good opportunity to let them know what you need off them to assist you in alleviating your ptsd. I'm sure a good doctor would take the time to come to some understanding with you.

Fingers Crossed for you and I hope you can do something nice for yourself afterwards. X

 

[KP the nut]

Good luck for tomorrow, I will be thinking of you.

 

[anonymous]

Thank you Springer80 and KP the nut. Today is the day. I'm feeling quite...calm? Numb? One of the two...I can't tell the difference anymore. But also feeling scared. I'll be ok...

I couldn't get an appointment to see my T after the Dr's appointment today, but she said she will call me, and I will see her tomorrow. I am planning to come home and have a nice long, hot spa bath. Something I absolutely love, but rarely do anymore. In fact, I can't remember the last time I did. That is the only thing that has ever been able to soothe and calm me. Hmmm yes, I really should do it more often!

Thank you again for the support. Will let you know in a few hours how I go.

 

[anonymous]

I absolutely will not let her look. Never. I won't ever have a pap smear, a breast exam, I won't ever have sex etc. So how do I go about getting this sorted? I can't just walk in and say 'Hey Doc, this is what's happening, but you can't look'

I have been on the pill for close to 8 months now, I was previously on it for about a year, and had 2 months off before going back on it. Instead of taking it the normal way, where you take the 'sugar pill' for 7 days while you...you know, have your period...I was taking it the whole time so I didn't have to have those 7 days of agony each month. I have PCOS which causes heavy bleeding and intense cramps, as well as cysts on the ovaries and other fun problems. Anyway, that pill stopped working, presumably because I had been on them for so long, so my Dr put me on another pill which was supposed to stop them completely.

I have to admit, I'm quite confused. How does one get diagnosed with ovarian cysts or get a prescription for birth control without ever having had an exam?

 

[piratelady]

Anonymous...#1 - I have PCOS also. I don't know what you weigh, and I'm not asking. But I have been told that by sticking with a reduced carb diet, eliminating processed carbs, and reducing your weight, it can go a long way to control those symptoms.

I agree with Anoymous..#2, How did you get a diagnosis without an exam? I had the symptoms for quite sometime and was diagnosed after having an ultrasound. I'm just curious.