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How to Stop Emotional Outbursts?
- Post starter Ms.T
- Start date
- Status
Boy do I wish I knew the answer to that one.
For me, I can't stop an emotional outburst, but sometimes I can ease it by doing something to pick myself up. I listen to music that moves me, or spend some time alone in a nice calming bubblebath, with candles and soft music.
It depends on what has caused the problem, but sometimes just changing my surroundings by going for a walk, or shopping can be enough to get me out of the mindset.
I have had several of these outbursts recently relating to my father who is terminally ill and has been given 3-6 months to live. I am finding myself unable to cope with this, and will frequently burst into tears that I cannot stop. It is very hard, but my hubby found the solution for those ones...We watch old episodes of All In The Family on youtube...it sometimes takes a few mins, but I can't resist laughing at Archie's antics and this brings me out of the crying jag.
I hope this has been helpful, or that someone else is able to give you a good answer.
Wishing you the best.
Take care.
For me, I can't stop an emotional outburst, but sometimes I can ease it by doing something to pick myself up. I listen to music that moves me, or spend some time alone in a nice calming bubblebath, with candles and soft music.
It depends on what has caused the problem, but sometimes just changing my surroundings by going for a walk, or shopping can be enough to get me out of the mindset.
I have had several of these outbursts recently relating to my father who is terminally ill and has been given 3-6 months to live. I am finding myself unable to cope with this, and will frequently burst into tears that I cannot stop. It is very hard, but my hubby found the solution for those ones...We watch old episodes of All In The Family on youtube...it sometimes takes a few mins, but I can't resist laughing at Archie's antics and this brings me out of the crying jag.
I hope this has been helpful, or that someone else is able to give you a good answer.
Wishing you the best.
Take care.
Hi Ms.T.
Welcome to the Forum :hello:
Can only say, "moderation" is good if possible. If you are feeling that bad, it's good to let it out. Being that PTSD is so associated with stuffing your emotions, to let some fly is not the end of the world. Try to (possibly) rest too, be gentle with yourself, do something distracting you enjoy. Make a list and try them one by one. Vent on here if you feel comfortable. Call someone, even a Crisis-Line. It's always a good idea to make sure there aren't other issues going on (physical ones). Depression, too is frequently seen with PTSD; there is really good info on this forum about stuff like that.
If anger is the outburst, try to get away from situation, do deep-breathers until you can gain perspective. It's not worth the damage it does to yourself.
Try to follow the basic H.A.L.T Principle- Are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired? Two or more of those is likely to send you "over the edge" more easily.
Dear Luthien am sorry about your dad. That's sounds like it's "anticipatory grief" which is normal and "healthy" (but horrible). I remember my mom getting diagnosed- it was actually worse than her death. And my dad, well, -there was no warning and that's when 99.9% of the grief got stuffed for me and was/ is still a source of great problems and was when this PTSD started for me.
-It is wonderful that you have such a caring, supportive husband.
OMG, -now all I can think of is "Meathead". :)
I know it is so hard but try to enjoy each day. One thing I have learned is what "time" a Dr. gives is irrelevant; sometimes they are right, other times very wrong.
Best wishes to you both.
Welcome to the Forum :hello:
Can only say, "moderation" is good if possible. If you are feeling that bad, it's good to let it out. Being that PTSD is so associated with stuffing your emotions, to let some fly is not the end of the world. Try to (possibly) rest too, be gentle with yourself, do something distracting you enjoy. Make a list and try them one by one. Vent on here if you feel comfortable. Call someone, even a Crisis-Line. It's always a good idea to make sure there aren't other issues going on (physical ones). Depression, too is frequently seen with PTSD; there is really good info on this forum about stuff like that.
If anger is the outburst, try to get away from situation, do deep-breathers until you can gain perspective. It's not worth the damage it does to yourself.
Try to follow the basic H.A.L.T Principle- Are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired? Two or more of those is likely to send you "over the edge" more easily.
Dear Luthien am sorry about your dad. That's sounds like it's "anticipatory grief" which is normal and "healthy" (but horrible). I remember my mom getting diagnosed- it was actually worse than her death. And my dad, well, -there was no warning and that's when 99.9% of the grief got stuffed for me and was/ is still a source of great problems and was when this PTSD started for me.
-It is wonderful that you have such a caring, supportive husband.
OMG, -now all I can think of is "Meathead". :)
I know it is so hard but try to enjoy each day. One thing I have learned is what "time" a Dr. gives is irrelevant; sometimes they are right, other times very wrong.
Best wishes to you both.
Thanks Junebug,
I had not heard of the H.A.L.T Principal, but it sounds like I should be using it every single time. I suffer from hypoglycemia frequently, and this greatly affects my moods, but is somehow still the last thing I ever think of.
You hit the nail on the head with "anticipatory grief" that is exactly what it is. I am grieving all the things I am going to be losing. It is really hard, and scaring me badly.
Meathead...LOL.
I have been trying to get through. I know the "time" is not something I should hold my breath on, but I've just visited my dad, he is in worse shape than I could have imagined, and even if the timeline isn't exact, it has to be pretty close.
I am working on trying to get through this, and at least for now, be okay, because I fear what will happen when he goes...
Your advice was great, Junebug....I hope Mrs. T finds it helpful.
I had not heard of the H.A.L.T Principal, but it sounds like I should be using it every single time. I suffer from hypoglycemia frequently, and this greatly affects my moods, but is somehow still the last thing I ever think of.
You hit the nail on the head with "anticipatory grief" that is exactly what it is. I am grieving all the things I am going to be losing. It is really hard, and scaring me badly.
Meathead...LOL.
I have been trying to get through. I know the "time" is not something I should hold my breath on, but I've just visited my dad, he is in worse shape than I could have imagined, and even if the timeline isn't exact, it has to be pretty close.
I am working on trying to get through this, and at least for now, be okay, because I fear what will happen when he goes...
Your advice was great, Junebug....I hope Mrs. T finds it helpful.
Ms. T,
I wish I had an answer as well. Yesterday, because I had to change my phone I started to get panicky and upset. Just because I had to change the cellphone I was using! Ridiculous right?
No, its because for me, I HAVE to have structure of some sort and I really hate change unless I initiate it because I feel at a loss of control. Thankfully my DH knows this and doesn't allow me to control him in any way. I find myself (after the fact) that at times i do. It isn't "right" its just how I am learning to cope. But I agree with what was said, its going to take time and a whole lot of practice!
I wish I had an answer as well. Yesterday, because I had to change my phone I started to get panicky and upset. Just because I had to change the cellphone I was using! Ridiculous right?
No, its because for me, I HAVE to have structure of some sort and I really hate change unless I initiate it because I feel at a loss of control. Thankfully my DH knows this and doesn't allow me to control him in any way. I find myself (after the fact) that at times i do. It isn't "right" its just how I am learning to cope. But I agree with what was said, its going to take time and a whole lot of practice!
I reckon part of my experience is related to being on the spectrum moreso than PTSD. I have Asperger Syndrome and meltdowns are inevitable. Regardless... I'll share my experience. There are some strategies I've learned in order to limit the outbursts. Like Kunoichi, I need structure in my life. I keep to a routine to minimize the surprises. Also try to chat about things to family or friends the moment they begin to bother me. Keeping anything bottled up is a recipe for disaster. For the times when I truly can't cope, I try to be alone if I'm able. Helps to have understanding people round you, who accept your requests to be by yourself. I'm fortunate in that respect. Lastly, I've found working through aspects of trauma to be helpful. I noticed a significant drop in meltdowns after working through one particular issue. Hoping for more of the same, the more issues I deal with.
redheaddanyell
New Here
I started to do count and breath exercises. Tap with your index finger on your knees while counting to 5 over and over again. At the same time take deep breaths in with the 5 and out with the 5. Usually helps me. Or I just mad clean my house. I am ocd vaccumer. It calms me...so sometimes I will vaccum the whole house top to bottom.
2notbedefeated
Gold Member
Ms. T,
Thanks for creating this thread. I too, need understanding of interventions to adress these issues.
I certianly need a major intervention with self-control in this area myself, too. My outburst deal predominatly of anger. I use be be able to control myself in this way. Well, I guess I just stuffed my feelings most of my life.
Now however, and I don't know why exactly, my anger comes out sideways. A couple of nights ago there was major conflict with kids an husband and I had tries to deal with it, but couldn't for some reason.
I went downstairs and I began to scream, hitting myself in the head, falling to the floor and having an adult temper tantrum as I proceeded to kick and scream. It lsst just a minutes, thank goodness, and was able to get myself back together.
This kind of thing has happen like 5 times before this last one. I am so embarrassed and appald with myself when I lose control like that. These emotions just get so powerful sometimes I can control myself and then there are times when I can't seem too. I don't know it's confusing.
I just seem to "lose grip of myself" and intense emotions take over. What the heck! Cause I use to be able to control myself and now I act like a maniac sometimes.
Do others here know about this kind of thing? My parents never acted that way when I was growingup. I never saw a grown-up act like that. So what happens to me, it's like a become a totally posessed person that is temporarily over taken by an angry, maniac being of some sort.
It's confusing to me. i have tried some of the things mentioned previously, but they don't seem to be too helpful right now. I know I need to learn other productive and healthy ways to maintain control.
Thanks for creating this thread. I too, need understanding of interventions to adress these issues.
I certianly need a major intervention with self-control in this area myself, too. My outburst deal predominatly of anger. I use be be able to control myself in this way. Well, I guess I just stuffed my feelings most of my life.
Now however, and I don't know why exactly, my anger comes out sideways. A couple of nights ago there was major conflict with kids an husband and I had tries to deal with it, but couldn't for some reason.
I went downstairs and I began to scream, hitting myself in the head, falling to the floor and having an adult temper tantrum as I proceeded to kick and scream. It lsst just a minutes, thank goodness, and was able to get myself back together.
This kind of thing has happen like 5 times before this last one. I am so embarrassed and appald with myself when I lose control like that. These emotions just get so powerful sometimes I can control myself and then there are times when I can't seem too. I don't know it's confusing.
I just seem to "lose grip of myself" and intense emotions take over. What the heck! Cause I use to be able to control myself and now I act like a maniac sometimes.
Do others here know about this kind of thing? My parents never acted that way when I was growingup. I never saw a grown-up act like that. So what happens to me, it's like a become a totally posessed person that is temporarily over taken by an angry, maniac being of some sort.
It's confusing to me. i have tried some of the things mentioned previously, but they don't seem to be too helpful right now. I know I need to learn other productive and healthy ways to maintain control.
2notbedefeated
I know exactly what you mean what you have described is what I go through alot. lose it over little things though something as simple as the car door wouldnt unlock yesterday and it really made me mad, so mad I was nearly in tears. Things that i cant fix mack me sad and really angry I hit myself and then after I calm down I wonder what all the fuss was about I feel stupid.
I realy wish I could just hit the pause button before i have an out burst and really think about what im doing before I do it, but it just all happens so fast.
Its like something just takes over my body and im angry and then as I am coming out I just cry...I just dont understand, I wish there was a simple solution.
I know exactly what you mean what you have described is what I go through alot. lose it over little things though something as simple as the car door wouldnt unlock yesterday and it really made me mad, so mad I was nearly in tears. Things that i cant fix mack me sad and really angry I hit myself and then after I calm down I wonder what all the fuss was about I feel stupid.
I realy wish I could just hit the pause button before i have an out burst and really think about what im doing before I do it, but it just all happens so fast.
Its like something just takes over my body and im angry and then as I am coming out I just cry...I just dont understand, I wish there was a simple solution.
Dear tazbat,
I have felt those strong emotions and sense of panic/ frustration/ grief/ lack of control that you describe.
Especially, I have found that during times of great grief.
I know it sounds ridiculous but the only thing that worked/ sometimes works for me is putting a specific thought in my head to "do" something for someone else, and then following through (then or later). Also, counting to 10 (or 100), deep-breathers, and especially walking-walking-walking-WALKING. Seems to redirect some energy; I can still "think about it and rehash it in my head" but I'm not in a position to (physically) "react" to it the same way.
-Someone said to me once, "well, at least you get great legs that way", lol. Guess it beats despair/ self-harm (-haven't done that in about 15 years).
-Or sleep, sometimes I feel so overwhelmed I just "pass out".
-Guess I need it.
I am sorry it is such a difficult time. Remember, some days are lousy, too. But some days will be good, even great.
Best wishes to you.
I have felt those strong emotions and sense of panic/ frustration/ grief/ lack of control that you describe.
Especially, I have found that during times of great grief.
I know it sounds ridiculous but the only thing that worked/ sometimes works for me is putting a specific thought in my head to "do" something for someone else, and then following through (then or later). Also, counting to 10 (or 100), deep-breathers, and especially walking-walking-walking-WALKING. Seems to redirect some energy; I can still "think about it and rehash it in my head" but I'm not in a position to (physically) "react" to it the same way.
-Someone said to me once, "well, at least you get great legs that way", lol. Guess it beats despair/ self-harm (-haven't done that in about 15 years).
-Or sleep, sometimes I feel so overwhelmed I just "pass out".
-Guess I need it.
I am sorry it is such a difficult time. Remember, some days are lousy, too. But some days will be good, even great.
Best wishes to you.
- Admin
- #11
anthony
Founder
You must relearn to identify your own mood, you must then initiate a counter self measure to take a more positive approach to the mood, feeling and emotion. It is about relearning how to approach and handle a situation when we have typically become used to avoidance or outbursts as a result of PTSD itself occurring. Read the information sections of the forum, as they contain lots of information on how to take back control, why things occur with you, etc etc. Read the entire thing IMO, each and every forum of it and thread.Ms.T said:
2notbedefeated
Gold Member
I just wanted to briefly add to this that my therapist has told me that I should let my thoughts, my mind control the emotions. Easier said then done, ibut it is a starting point I guess.
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