How To Stop Recalling Memory/dream?

[safenow]

How do I just let go and stop caring? I

I think you need to process that dream. Once you process it, it won't be a big deal in your life and you can let it go.

For me, in order to process something like that, I go to my journal, and write down the issue in as much detail as I can. Then I break apart the detail. For example: Let say, I'm thinking about my father and one particular incident. I will break down the words (give each one a definition) and see if I agree with that definition. Goodness, I hope this makes sense to you.

Anyway, once I see the reality of that particular dream/issue it become a past thing that goes away. You might want to try it, it can't hurt.

 

[BloomInWinter]

What you are describing is called rumination.

Rumination steals time from our precious lives in an endless cycle of reliving some memory but without resolution.

Grounding, distraction, enjoyable activities, and practicing mindfulness are all good skills for breaking out out the cycle.

Have you "leaned into it" fully by setting aside 15 minutes to fully experiencing it without judgment? You can also lessen its hold over you by fully journaling it out.

It's not a bad habit. Everyone does it at times. But it does form a deep groove that over time gets deeper and deeper the more we go over it. It's like a bike rut in our brain. We have to take a hard turn to get out of it.

 

[Venusian]

I was going to suggest exactly what Safenow had written and what Bloom also wrote. I have had these experiences and the only way I could move past it was to do these things. Have you read the thread on "Exposure Therapy" I think it is a pinned thread.

When I had this problem I was experiencing flashbacks to recovered memories that had been buried so far that I never in my wildest dreams thought I had experienced. I could not get through them until I took a few days to just let myself go through it again knowing that I survived it and I was in a safe place. I had to keep grounding myself but still acknowledging that it did happen. It was in the past and I am safe now.

It took days to get out of the immediate, I am not sure of the correct word, but obsessive thinking may be close. What you are doing now by by writing about it and sharing it and having others respond is a great way to do this. Try and have some good grounding techniques that work for you and keep talking and writing and reminding yourself it was a nightmare and that you are in a safe place now.

 

[Nyasu]

So glad to read that I´m not the only one.... I have the same problem!

I had some quite stressful years, following a job loss and private issues. Distraction is the only thing that works for me.... Are there other ways?

 

[franciemarnie]

I don't know if this would be applicable to you, but there have been times when Ive been triggered into the most intense hypervigilant state and when I was in that state, my thinking brain would search with its spotlight for anything that might be the problem and it would find something (that wasn't necessarily a problem) and obsess the hell out of it.

I remember once - and I thought I would go insane - I left work to walk home and could not stop going over this perfectly ordinary proposal (Id done a thousand times) in my head. Going over and over and over it to no productive end. I was aware I was doing this and it was irrational and Id say, I am not going to think about it from here to the end of the block and I couldn't do it. Time after time. It was like I lost control of my mind. It went on like this for days.

I happened to have signed on for a retreat in the country that weekend in another state and thank God that powerful distraction blew me off that insane neural pathway.

If this resonates, and regular meditation and grounding and exercise and therapy aren't helping, try to think of some activity so distracting and compelling that it can get you off this course of maddening thinking. It will go away eventually though. The sooner the better of course. It is so unpleasant!

 

[ms spock]

5 minute cold shower will bring you to focus on your body. Can be a great distraction.

 

[Jenfa]

I had a similar event happen last week. I asked my doctor if it were something to do with being manic or the like, but he told me something strange in return.

He said that a few others had come to him that were faithfully taking their meds (i.e. Effexor) but felt as if they had missed a dose or multiple doses. A sort of obsessive state which is a large part of withdrawal was experienced.

Beginning with horrible dreams, it goes on for a day or so. Now, I can't speak for anyone but me, but I know that I took mine every day. Time-released medication couldn't be an exact science with the things we eat and drink, exercise and fitness levels, how we process things, etc.

Has anything to do with diet or medication been altered lately? It may be something more innocent than it feels. I hope you feel better!