How's Your Day Been? Each Day is Different, So Make Your Mark Daily

[anthony]

Congrats marlene... well done.

 

[becvan]

Well, I'm worn into the ground. I'm so tired, I don't even want coffee. I'm not going anywhere and not doing anything unless I have to. It's a weekend to relax. I will read threads and post and whatnot later. I'm just too exhausted..


Anthony: think this is from imagry? I'm beyond wiped.. kinda odd..

Bec

 

[anthony]

Yer, kinda sucks being slapped in the face in one fowl swoop from a picture of your current emotional self... ha? :) Kinda gives a whole new meaning to reality check!!!!!!!!!

 

[Deleted member 93]

Bec, right there with ya.

Me today... I slept. I could not stay awake. I got up about 12 hours ago and took a scheduled pill. But amazing, I woke again in panic and muscle spasms. The amazing thing is I did not take more. I should have by now but instead I sank myself into books and a few drinks later. Tight muscles and a pissy mood. Before I was teetering on a violent episode. That was when I went and hit the books and a (weak)beer.

Still a bit pissed I cannot find my journals, I liked to go through them to pace and place myself. Just need to settle on I need to start a new one where I am now and keep going.

Good thing, hubs got me a pair of Dr.Scholl's walking shoes (that are actually cute) for dog walking and an ashtray (which must be where my journals are!)

Need to wrap this up soon... Hubs said he would do the dishes if I got myself motivated to walk the dogs. The clutter of dirty dishes is driving me nuts.

Hubs has gone back to dipping which is just flat nasty. He has been off a couple years, but during the move he went back... At least his habit does not stink up the whole house like my smoking. But dang I need to find a good arguement for him to quit again as he did so well.

Inlaws said they wanted to take kids Sat night so we could do something. Me I am thinking clean, but we are supposed to do something... Yech. How about a nap?

 

[cookie]

veiled, find some pics (internet) of people with mouth cancer from snuff. it was the worse thing i had seen in my nursing, and i'd seen some rough stuff. if they can remove it, it is disfiguring, often resulting in loss of teeth, gums. lips, even parts of the jaw. they have to feed you with a tube to your stomach. it is really a terribly painful thing, too. maybe he would quit, if you would? that might be a bit hard right now, though. sounds like you're getting settled--an amazing thing to undertake a move like that, i couldn't do it myself.

 

[YoungAndAngry]

Managed to do alot of cleaning last night while boyfriend was sleeping...
I enjoy cleaning @ night, while everythings quiet in the house... no distractions, lol
The only downside is boyfriends not there to wake me from my nightmare
Nightmare is basically always the same, with different twists added each night.

I have errands to do today, ugh,
(and I have to get boyfriend a christmas gift still, omg)
I think today is the day I will venture out and get some things done.

Take care everyone,
Y&A

 

[becvan]

Yer, kinda sucks being slapped in the face in one fowl swoop from a picture of your current emotional self... ha? :) Kinda gives a whole new meaning to reality check!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, no kidding.. I suspected it was such a thing. I feel better today but still no omph. Spent all day hooking up a second dish.. blah still trouble shooting it.. we kept burning out disk switches.. damn things.. avoiding my trauma thread for the moment.. just to exhausted to hit it anymore right now.. wow.. can't believe how this womped me!

Bec

 

[anthony]

It was womping you as you say regardless bec, now you have just accepted what was already present... you put the finger on the problem so to speak. Instead of the problem causing you long term symptom outbreak, the problem is engaged logically now for rapid solution.

 

[nov_silence]

I feel guilty about not being on more. Really really really tired. Started meds again (a more consistent basis) and feel wiped. It's been hard to keep a positive outlook. Feel like this christmas break wasn't a break as a lot of stuff came up for me. Not looking forward to being with people for new year's. I have done so much visiting over the break, just want to stary home.

 

[Deleted member 93]

Slept all day. Went out last night with hubs and went in a sit down place to eat. I also went in to two stores with hubs and his parents house. Picked out movies to watch at home (theater was too big a jump). HUbs has poked me awake enough to stay on top of meds is all. Got up about 5:30 PM.

 

[GR-ass]

I met a guy. We sat up talking all night (totally sober)

He held me as I slept. No sex involved (that night).
Was the first night in a long while that I didn't wake feeling exhausted. I did startle awake though because of the feel of him holding me. He just talked to me, calmed me down. I told him about my PTSD but not my trauma.

New years eve however he invited me to a friends place. One of his mates (he didn't know about the PTSD- the mate that is, not Luke) set off a fire cracker behind me.
It threw me into instant panic mode. I ended up curled up sobbing in the corner. Luke came over and basically talked to me, and when I eventually let him, held me till I calmed down. All in all, it took me about 45 minutes to calm.

Funny thing is, between Friday and new years, we found out that my aunt and his mum are best friends and that he and I used to be babysat together by my grandmother when we were littlies.

Before I found this out I had made the comment that it felt like I had known him forever. Guess I really have.

 

[Deleted member 93]

Cass, that sounds great! You are opening up and letting someone in. Big congrats.