Well my resting heart rate was 96 while anticipating what my sister wrote me, as we have been fighting. Sure enough it was bad. So I fought back. I tried to make up with her, but she continued to fight. Had my pt, got a little aggression out then, but I was wiped. Between fighting with her and fighting with my son, I was not doing well physically. Just beat. I am not a fighter. So she said some mean things, and I said mean things back. Finally I just told her I loved her just as I did before this whole mess started, and that she would always be my little sister. She said, yep, I love you too. Eventually we started talking again. Relieved.
My son is fighting with me because he feels I am not doing enough physically. He is 20 and knows it all. We had a real doozy of an argument. This is while my sister and I were arguing. I think we are calmed down now. I realize he just worries about me, but we need to do this getting better on my schedule. It is going to take time. I am working on it.
I am utterly exhausted, emotionally and physically. I did have some real bad thoughts for a while. Thankfully they have gone away. My go to spot, when things are bad. I had IV therapy the other day, in the midst of all of this. It is suppose to help me feel better, unfortunately it had to work with the stress my body is feeling, and that is not going well. Hopefully it will help now that things are getting better. I'm just wiped.