I Just Want This Therapist Out Of My Life

[Reds]

So right now I hate her and want her out of my life. I don't ever wanna see her again or any other therapist ever again. I just want them all out of my life :bawling:

 

[jd9900]

I'm sorry. :(

 

[jd9900]

I am going back to my therapist after about a half year hiatus. In my head, I think I feel a lot like you do for the opposite reasons. It is like total chaos in my brain, and I think it is because I have not seen my therapist for so long.

It strikes me over and over that I need to strike a balance. Stop seeing him weekly for months on end, then getting so pissed off I don't want to see him for months on end until I get so out of sorts I have to see him for months on end...

I am working on this, but over and over, the word "balance" keeps coming to me when I feel this way.

 

[digger]

So right now I hate her and want her out of my life

Because she's done something or because you are hating the idea of therapy right now?

 

[Miss cptsd xx]

I know that feeling. My last 'shrink' told me I had to take off my armour :O_o: Ok yeah it's that's easy for us? So I never went back, she just didn't get me. My next one was great. Maybe change until you find someone you are comfortable with.

 

[Reds]

@digger1, I can't seem to get hold of her anywhere. She is not even replying to my emails. @Miss cptsd xx, I don't think I will be able to trust anyone else, she understood me and I think we got along very well. I just don't understand where she's disappeared to.

 

[Miss cptsd xx]

Maybe she is on holiday? I'm sure she can't have just disappeared without saying something.

 

[digger]

How long have you given her to respond to your email? Maybe she is away, or unwell...was her son not ill recently? Perhaps she has gone down with whatever he had? Also, I would not expect her to respond outside her normal working hours, unless that is something she has agreed to do for you? So I wouldn't expect a response on a weekend for example. There are lots of possible reasons for her not responding that aren't personal to you.

 

[Reds]

She always replies to my emails, whether it is a weekend or at night. There were times I would chat with her via email until 10pm. I am not sure if her son is now well or not. She said she will be available on email whilst taking care of her son. Maybe I am overreacting but how can she disappear now, I am going through hell. I do not even have the energy to get out of my house. I have been locked here since Friday. Maybe there's a good reason but it still hurts that she is not replying. I emailed her last week Thursday, this past Wednesday, Thursday and yesterday. I hate that I believed her when she told me she will always be available

 

[cherryblossom]

I'm sorry to say this, but your relationship with your T doesn't sound very healthy. I think you need to find some other ways of coping, than expecting your therapist to be there for you and to support you 24/7.

Maybe your therapist has encouraged this sort of relationship, but it's just not right. Your therapist should be teaching you skills to enable you to cope on your own, or encouraging you to build up support from family and friends, so you have someone else to turn to when things get difficult.

Has she taught you any skills you can draw on to feel less trapped, in your home? She has encouraged you to rely solely on her, and that's not right. It's not ethical. Particularly since she clearly isn't available to you at all times, like she said she would be. Seriously - who could be? I don't mean that as in how could anyone be available to you personally, but how could a therapist always be there for a client when they have their own life to lead?

You need to seriously look at your therapeutic relationship, and whether it's doing you more harm than good.

 

[digger]

she told me she will always be available

Ok, I have to say, I think that's both unrealistic and maybe a bit unprofessional on her part. No-one can promise to be available to you at all times, life just isn't that predictable.

She said she will be available on email whilst taking care of her son.

Illness and children are also not that predictable in my experience...;)

She always replies to my emails, whether it is a weekend or at night.

Has this ever actually been agreed between you though. I know that it has happened, and that you have come to rely on it being the case, but was there ever a conversation where she said that ie at the beginning of your relationship was it part of your 'contract' with her? I have to agree with @cherryblossom, I don't think it's healthy for you and I don't think it's productive or helpful for her to be encouraging this, and if she is encouraging it then I think you maybe need to look at either establishing some firmer boundaries with her, or finding a therapist who will set those boundaries, especially given what happened with your previous therapist.

I would also say though that if this is so very out of character for her then I would imagine that the reasons lie with her/her situation rather than anything personal to you.

 

[digger]

I've got to question as well how healthy it is, for the therapist themselves, to be available 24/7 to clients? It's not exactly a stress free job is it, I would actually be quite worried if my therapist was attempting to offer that level of commitment to all her clients - where is her down time, her time to recharge, if that's the case? How can she be her best at her job if she is never away from it?

Sorry if I've taken this slightly off topic but it seems a bit odd to me for a good therapist to be offering this.