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Is Anyone Else Like Me

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Pauline

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Hi so I am not sure if this is the right place to post about what I want to talk about so sorry if its not.

When I was 16 years old my trauma was that one day at school I could not breathe for four hours. I do suffer from a congenital complex heart condition so I guess that is what caused my difficult breathing.

I was rushed to hospital and suddenly I blacked out. When I woke up I was confused and disorientated I could not remember my friend or my sister. From then on it just got worse. I lost my memory. I did not remember my family or friends for a month or my surroundings.

I was sent to a psychiatrist who said they don't know what caused the memory loss why it was so severe.

When I finally got better I went back to school but I was badly bullied by girls in my year. Endless days of panic attacks.

When I was 20 I went to go see a therapist for my panic attacks and fear of losing my memory again. He told me I have complex ptsd.

I overdosed this year at age 22 but luckily I survived. I am a self harmer but have not done it for six months since my overdose..

I am trying so hard to stay well but I still have horrible memories of when I couldn't remember anyone and the bullying at school.

If someone else has had any similar experience please I would love to feel like I am not alone. My therapy is going extremely slowly because I cannot talk about losing my memory in detail as whenever I do I always feel like something bad is going to happen to me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.
 
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Didn't experience the same, although I was bullied at school and by my family and when I was eight I choked on a sweet, couldn't breathe for around one minute which was terrifying. (other traumas too including sexual abuse) Welcome to the forum, you'll receive a lot of great advice and support here, :hug: :hug: :hug:
 
I had what I called a "mini stroke" recently, I was up a two step ladder painting the ceiling, (which was silly really, as I have a back injury, but I've nobody to help me) was leaning back to get a bit I had missed.

When I felt really dizzy, the room spun round in all directions, I felt sick and couldn't breathe, my heart rate doubled, I felt sweaty, I thought I was dying!

I managed to stagger to the front door to try and get some air, but still couldn't breathe, everything was spinning, my blood was boiling, I put my wrists on the ramp hand rail to cool it down.

It took me about thirty minutes to recover, I went and made a sweet cup of tea and sat down. Eventually I felt a bit better, but never did anything else for the rest if that day.

Having been in the ambulance service, I had a good idea of what was happening to me, but luckily I survived the event. Since then I've been taking things a bit slower?
 
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