Anyone else struggle with orthorexia?

[Ecdysis]

So, my abusive parent had orthorexia and passed it down to us kids by insisting that "it's massively important that you stick to these (irrational, unhealthy) rules when eating" and it's stuck around with me ever since.

I never know what to "do" about it. Obviously, it's not as dangerous as anorexia, so I sort of ignore it and just try to cope as best I can.

But at the same time, like anorexia, it's a big issue at every meal and everyime I go shopping for groceries and I feel like by ignoring it, I'm really doing myself a disservice.

I know I've got signs of malnutrition from it, that have caused some serious health issues over the years. My Dr's don't realise that I'm (silently, secretly) dealing with orthorexia or that it's skewing my food intakes in ways that are harmful.

But then, on my list of "things to work on in therapy", it's never been amongst the top 10 most important issues, because there's always more urgent stuff to deal with, so it just gets ignored for another year...

 

[Sideways]

it's never been amongst the top 10 most important issues

It doesn’t sound like this issue for you is cleanly distinguishable from your relationship with your abusive parent. So, maybe dealing with this is part of your recovery from the things that are higher up your top 10?

My parents managed to get a Power of Attorney while I was unwell, and took control of (not insubstantial amount) my money. The money was never really important to me, so dealing with it sat really low on my priorities for years. I actually figured that I could probably get on fine with never really dealing with it. *shrug* let ‘em have it, it’s jot important in the grand scheme of my issues.

But of course, it was a big part of my issues. And choosing to ‘not’ deal with it was a way to reduce/avoid dealing with the profound issues in my relationship with my parents.

Which is central to both my trauma and my recovery.

Just an idea.

 

[Dark.Green.Feathers]

seconding Sideways on the looking at the root cause route. i’ve not had orthorexia but a lot of my stuff benefits more from finding the roots instead of trying to cut it back until it stops growing.

i understand the feeling of always something else being more important than xyz also important issues. parent and food stuff are really difficult. could you make a start / touch on this in connection to a top 10?

rooting for you

 

[Friday]

I had to google that term… and it immediately made sense.

It’s not something I’ve ever dealt with, but I’ve seeeeeen it, a whole helluva lot in both ED circles & first world countries. Where people treat food like they’re allergic to it, or it’s poisonous (same thing, really, as allergies are “just” a body responding to a substance as if it’s poison).

It tends to fall more on the Specific-phobias & OCD side of brains being wacky? (Ditto, some religions, which are neither ocd nor phobia related, but spiritual belief, which is a different brain-thing; read kosher, halal, & other GOD SAYS NO beliefs influencing behavior. Which, responds veeeeery differently than PTSD, OCD/Phobias, & ED. Brainzzz? Are seeeerious delegators.). Which means it has veeeeery different “best treatments” than what will feel natural/right for you, dealing with PTSD. DO try them, though. Because it gives you more tools. Some days will feel like you’re throwing spaghetti at a wall, to see what sticks (PTSD tricks, ED tricks, Phobia/OCD tricks)… but one or more WILL stick/work/flooding relief… and you’ll get the hang of judging what’s what, shrug, or be willing to try everything, because you know one -or more, in conjunction- WILL work. But? It’s experiential. A learned thing. Like all skills.

TENDS TO… Meaning, not always. I have ED. I also have trauma-related disordered eating, that has zip zero nada zilch to do with my ED. It’s entirely trauma-focused. Many people, especially those with childhood trauma (I don’t have that, still got the brass ring), will have both, as well. Actual ED, and then trauma related food issues, fueled by core beliefs, lessons learned in trauma, & cognitive distortions, oh my! That could seem like a lot… or? As my fave therapist quotes “So there’s a food piece.” Yep! Just a piece. Of a whole. That we don’t have to deal with, right now. Or can. As we please. As makes sense. Completely within our control as to when/where/how/why. Shrug. It’s a piece. Deal with it as it comes up, or table it, for now. Either way. Simple. <<< The rare people who can simplify complex issues? You can probably understand why he’s one of my fave people.

 

[Ecdysis]

Yeah, it feels sort of like inherited food-OCD... Sigh...

It's funny, cos when you see other ppl's orthorexia, it's so obvious it's an OCD thing... They're so convinced that what they're doing is "healthy" and that they're eating "right"...

But then I know that the rules I was taught at home about food are nutty too, but I still feel like I "have to" follow them...

Meh... I dunno... It feels like one of those things where if you tug at a loose thread, you end up unravelling your whole sweater...

Sigh... I'm not sure I feel up to an unravelled sweater (ie. brain) right now...

 

[Helpfulmom]

Medically it is considered more serious then anorexia nervosa, because it is so hidden, under wraps and less well understood. It is very unhealthy because what one will and can consume, grows so small, and smaller over time. Leading to health issues.

Please stop rationalizing that its not as dangerous as, etc, while saying its caused you a lot of health issues- any health issue, that persistently has a negative effect on you, and is chronic would recieve care- this deserves care too.

You've highlighted here, how sometimes someone needs more help then they realize and the trap our minds keep us in, that mirror addict brain, when it comes to eating disorders and how sometimes someone who "seems ok", needs the most help- for the very thing they minimalize, why? Because the brain needs help from professionals, teams even- for eating disorders- they are chronic and hard to beat on their own.

They effect someone over their lifetime, not just when they are at their height. Please get help for this, if not that, at least get support but be careful- support groups can have the opposite effect, for eating disordered people- sorta making them "miss parts of it"(did i mention we activate the same part of our brain as addiction, with disordered eating)?

We express trauma through it, we inhibit or feel our emotions through how we eat- they are partially genetic yes- meaning we observe our mothers,grandmothers,aunts and all the subconcious ques they send about their relationship to their body and food- and some cope "with stress", "through food", through things like "limiting what I eat helps me control something ", so there are things that need new coping, new patterns, fears around certain foods because that fear is so large(hence the avoidance).

Please get help♡