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Is This Normal For Therapy, Have Got Worse, Feeling Awful, Need Some Advice, Help!

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Lou82

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Hi have been in therapy for nearly 3 months with a specialist. I have had PTSD with Agoraphobia for 7 years due to a criminal incident, I have had the wrong diagnosis, inexperienced people treat me and had to fight to get this treatment. Now I am in therapy it is making my anxiety so high, I feel so awful, and everyday feels like a struggle, I feel like I am not coping and do not no what to do! Different members of my family have been living with me for over two years since I had only recently though knowing what it was a dissociate episode which caused the agoraphobia by the way two years ago and made me get so ill!

My family are stressed out looking after me, I feel awful about it, my boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year the therapy has made me worse and after talking me down after a beginning of an episode after I got my self in such a state because a family member was leaving to go home, which came totally out of the blue) I wont let him go any distance and that's causing problems and I think its because if symptoms start he talked me down once so he could again, I no when I am calm its stupid, but not when I am in a state! The specialist just wants to process memories and doesn't seem to take on board how awful I feel, and the stress I am under all I hear is it will get better When! I seriously have had enough the NHS will only fund 8 more sessions at home and as I cannot travel to the specialist centre because I am not well enough, I will be referred back to my local mental health team, the same place said I was cured 5 years ago even though I couldn't go out of the road I live on and had to fight 5 years to get further help!

I don't know whether to go into hospital to relive the burden on my family and making they can help, and find my a drug that doesn't give me horrible side effects which I have been off now for 5 days!

Appreciate any advice, has anyone else had/going through this? Is there a light at the end of the tunnel because all I feel is I've been through hell, trying to get better has made feel awful and there's no light in sight!
 
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The problem with nhs treatment is that it tends to be time limited and focused on quick fixes. Your therapist really needed to make sure you have the skills to ground yourself and manage your distress before processing memories - but that takes time that your remaining sessions won't give you. Being an in patient is a big decision but you might get more intensive therapeutic support which, given you can't leave home, would be difficult to get on a home service basis.

Does your therapist now how distressed you are and have they talked to you about coping strategies?
 
have been in therapy for nearly 3 months with a specialist.
Is it a trauma specialist or an agoraphobia specialist?

Different members of my family have been living with me for over two years since I had only recently though knowing what it was a dissociate episode which caused the agoraphobia by the way two years ago and made me get so ill!
Can you explain this further?

It is not unusual for anxiety to increase with therapy as you are tackling such difficult issues. However over time it should improve. It looks to me as if you are starting to panic about the 'what next?' situation once your current therapy ends. Of course you might be tons better by then.

I do think it is important that you tell your therapist about your worries. I am treated by the NHS. I have my therapy at home - and have been having it for over 4 years now. It started frequently, now I can go months between sessions because I am so much better. I hear that you have had bad experiences with the NHS but it is not all like that.
 
Thank you for replying, yes the NHS in my view are all about quick fixes and time limited amongst other things I feel I was a victim of crime and the victim of the NHS purely because I had a condition nobody in my borough was qualified to treat! I have spoken to my CBT trauma therapist about this but she just wants to do processing, and the only coping strategies we spoke about is scented oils and a special object which isn't helping and when I phoned her in distress because of anxiety symptoms all she said is you have to deal with it!

Also only found out about these episodes 6 months ago, and that I had one after the trauma in 2002, then in 2007 but nobody I saw in my local team picked up on it even though I kept telling them it wasn't a panic attack that's why they think only now through this specialist I got agoraphobia basically It scared me so much, knew something was wrong and never got the right treatment and I stopped going out after this. Then the one I had in 2012 was the worse I feel because of the 4 years or so of fighting to get further help all the stress I was under, I went 3 months without knowing what was happening/happened then the so-called therapist couldn't give me the proper information about it just the word, them 3 months after it happened was awful not knowing what the hell happened to me, my local team wanting to put me in hospital the same one where some my trauma took place and why I developed PTSD, wasn't sleeping, didn't want to be on my own, still the same now, symptoms 24 hrs a day and losing weight, I was down to six and a half stone and lost that weight very quickly 3-4 weeks!

Two years later I don't feel much has improved and experience some of the above and its not been though me not fighting, wanting it to, just feel hopeless, exhausted and can't take much more of this crap! Not sure what to do!
 
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To be honest, posts about problems with the NHS are not uncommon on this board. I suggest making a post that says something like "need help working with NHS" or similar, or doing a search to see how others have navigated within the system. Making such a post will specifically catch the eye of those in your country whereas this one may be skipped over. (I am hoping you get more help that way.)
 
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