Here are a few ideas and some coping methods, I have used to combat my own loneliness. I’ll try to stay on track this time,
@LittleBigFoot
I’d also browsed home improvement centers and large 24/7 grocery stores late at night when feeling lonely. Attending movie theaters and eating out alone, I’ve also done alone. I once knew a man who routinely ate his lunch at a local diner every day.
Perhaps, you might not feel so alone when returning home after work, if, you first ate dinner out at a restaurant. Then you might browse your local library, or attend an evening class (aerobics, yoga, painting, etc) at a local community/ college center or just go shopping before returning home.
The YMCA is another option with evening hours, if, one is available. My mother use to play duplicate bridge late into the evening on week-nights. But very few other places are open late at night, except for the night clubs and I’ve never felt comfortable going to them alone. Perhaps, a Karaoke bar might be fun. I’ve never attended one.
I use to walk through the shopping mall just to get out of my empty house. I can recall feeling so bad one afternoon, that I drove my car to town just to sit on a city park bench to watch the people pass by.
Before covid, many evening ‘meet-up’ groups were held on week-nights in the city. Yet both week-day nights, along with long drives present a problem. High school sporting events use to be plentiful yet with covid restrictions, I would need to do some searching. There are online community event calendars.
Some classes and events do permit walk-ins or random attendance, such as, artists groups where they meet on week-day evenings to paint together (beginners included).
Yet the worse part, for me, was often late at night when, I couldn’t sleep. At 3 am, I’ve sometimes sit in the dark, playing my piano until I’d felt sleepy enough to go back to bed.
I can recall the dreaded feeling of walking into my empty house, 20+ years ago. I did eventually get use to it. But then, in your case, your family is with you one day then absent the next then, back again — this would be a difficult adjustment. Beyond the immense silence are the empty chairs. And that no one is there to hear about your earlier experiences that day.
This might sound a bit crazy, but at times when alone, I have vocalized my rant towards my houseplant, who I’ve named, Mr. Henry. And no he’s not related to Wilson. lol
My TV was then also always on. I was then played many video games to pass the time when I was too stressed to think clearly. I ate my meals sitting in front of the TV. You might also avoid eating your dinner at the same table where your family usually joins you.
Then too, you might try getting lost and totally absorbed in whatever interests you and stirs your passion. Focus on filling the next few hours with your interests and projects then, the next few hours rather than the more disturbing next three days. When I focus on my present moment, I’m experiencing myself while feeling less lonely and less empty.
In regards to loneliness there is also what I refer to as ‘the tug.’ This ‘tug’ I have felt in my solar plexus when having to part from someone I’ve felt deeply connection to in some way. It sort of feels like my breath is being gently pulled out of me. Yet I think this ’tug’ is just part of being human — and although, it isn’t always consciously felt, I think it’s a kind of deeply felt loneliness or emptiness that never really goes away.
