Just Can't Be Bothered

[Ice_Fire]

I've started a new job, I have lots of college work to do and the usual household chores. But I just don't care. I have no motivation. I feel very down at the moment. I know I need to go and have a shower and dry my hair properly, but it feels like too much effort. 'Why bother, you're not filthy, it's too much effort and why do you even care?' <---- those sort of thoughts enter my head and I put it off a little longer. Disgusting.

But...that's the truth. I just want to curl up in bed and not bother with anything. But I can't, so I just robotically do whatever I need to. It's too much hassle and effort to even put the plastic smile on, nobody seems to notice anyway.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

(((Icefire))) I really feel for you. I have days like that. I just put one foot in front of the other. You have alot going on. i hope you get some down time, it sounds like that is exactly what you need. Big hugs.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I am very sorry you are struggling so much Rose. I was worried about you when you were talking about taking on so much. Very sorry you feel that way.

 

[Britt.f7]

I wish I had some comforting words for you. I do not even have as much going on as you and I find the daily life chores(showering, etc.,). I'm really trying to get out of this. They are going to adjust my meds in the hope that it helps me get up, out, and about.

I wish for you to find that same strength.

 

[piratelady]

What you said sums up how I am doing to a Tee. I hope you get your motivation back.

 

[Sues]

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I know it's hard. I had a period of time when I was like that too. It really sucks and I don't know how I got better, but I know that it does get better.

 

[Ice_Fire]

Thank you everyone for the kind words. Need to get up and get ready for college. Just realised I'd forgotten about some homework that is due in first thing. Part of me doesn't care. :(

Work later, I'm sure the time will pass quick enough. Thinking I've taken too much on recently, but now I'm here, none of it is stuff I can just stop and/or forget about.

 

[Ice_Fire]

Britt and PirateLady, I'm really sorry you are feeling like this too. :(
(((((hugs)))))

 

[Britt.f7]

Thank you Ice Fire! Strong hugs back to you.

 

[Ice_Fire]

Had a shower. Going to work yesterday was actually probably the best thing for me. Made me function. Been thinking a lot and I seem to have made some connections between how I'm feeling now and the general situation I was in when I was little. Inner child 'stuff' that's brought me down? Seems like it.

 

[Tinyflame]

((((((Ice Fire, and All)))))

 

[Ice_Fire]

Forcing myself to do, well, anything. I only had a three and a half hour shift this morning and when I got home all I wanted to do was sleep. Shouldn't have given in to it, I was rewarded with yet another bad dream. Really rubbish when you can't even do nothing without managing to feel worse.

Making small and slow progress with a school essay, but that's better than not doing it at all.