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Sufferer Medical Trauma/Told I deserved it.

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Why are you refusing to believe you have sarcoidosis? You could have had asthma, and then developed sarcoidosis. Not from the asthma, just on it's own. Many doctors are telling you it's sarcoidosis and you are refusing to believe them and would prefer that they say you have asthma. I'm sorry you don't believe them.
Why are Doctors telling me I must say I wanted it to be Sarcoidosis? Or I will never know what is wrong with me?

Or Doctors telling me, I thought you did not want it to be asthma? So they don’t send me to an asthma Doctor even though xrays, notes, everything says asthma. Yes xrays. Tests for asthma. Told to my face: Sarcoidosis. Or I am being lied to.

I have recordings.
 
Even people here saying it is mental. UGH
PTSD is a mental illness with physical symptoms caused by trauma. We’re all mental here! You are posting here because your medical shit is
tangled up with trauma shit
People here get that. This is a place for facing mental illness if you want to. Physical diseases are supporting actors here.

You could have had asthma, and then developed sarcoidosis.
This ⬆️ is not the same statement as this ⬇️
Sarcoidosis does not turn into asthma.

No one is attacking you or has said one rude thing to you. Everyone is trying to understand your perspective based on their own experiences, and yet you have insulted two people.

There is a saying here, “Take what’s useful, ignore the rest.” Are you finding anything useful here so far?
 
PTSD is a mental illness with physical symptoms caused by trauma. We’re all mental here! You are posting here because your medical shit is

People here get that. This is a place for facing mental illness if you want to. Physical diseases are supporting actors here.
My trauma is directly related to not being helped on purpose with life threatening asthma. That on recordings I have Been told. It is EXACTLY the words I say to mental health providers. Why did a mental health Doctor tell me in 2020, Doctor BLAH BLAH is mad at you. Doctor BLAH BLAH lied you.

Doctor BLAH BLAH, keep saying Sarcoidosis. The grand lie. Where did this Mental health Doctor get her info? I sent her back to a mental health provider 2014 who said Dr BLAH BLAH is mad at you and you deserved to die.

Asthma can on it’s own cause mental health issues. Because it is terrifying. Which is why in Fall 2010 I told the Doctor BLAH BLAH, I think I am going to die. She said no you are not. Can asthma attack cause death? Yes. So surgery Easter 2011, I trigger IN the surgery. Mental? Oxygen to 70 just like I had been saying all along. They dismissed me. They were found to be wrong Easter 2011.

So why continue the abuse? Not in my best interests.

I was told by a Doctor that surgery and asthma means special precaution. Hence me asking why my oxygen went to 70 surgery Easter 2011. Look it up.

IT MEANS DEATH without the precautions.

This ⬆️ is not the same statement as this ⬇️


No one is attacking you or has said one rude thing to you. Everyone is trying to understand your perspective based on their own experiences, and yet you have insulted two people.

There is a saying here, “Take what’s useful, ignore the rest.” Are you finding anything useful here so far?
It’s clearly not what the OP is wanting… because it is allllllllllll tangled up with trauma shit.

They could get the best docs on the planet, with the perfect (series of) diagnosis, and the past would still be lighting them on fire and refusing to accept the present.

Because that’s mental illness for ya.

This is triggering. I had the best Docs on the planet SCREWING with me. in fact, NY medical ethics was going to CITE one of them.

This ⬆️ is not the same statement as this ⬇️


No one is attacking you or has said one rude thing to you. Everyone is trying to understand your perspective based on their own experiences, and yet you have insulted two people.

There is a saying here, “Take what’s useful, ignore the rest.” Are you finding anything useful here so far?
I had OLD sarcoidosis in my lungs fall 2010. When I started asthma attacks. They are not connected in any way.

So in fall 2010, I had productive cough. Summer 2010, unproductive cough.

I had asthma that they knew of Fall 2010. The Sarcoidosis dry cough is a very common symptom.

Asthma can be either.

You know what the Doctors keep putting down my symptoms? Cough and shortness of breath. That is it. I keep saying productive cough. The difference is the key. One cough and shortness of breath, they can go so many different directions.

My symptoms are way more direct to the problem. On triggers My oxygen quickly goes to 70. Lungs fill with thick mucus that I can’t cough out. What helps, get away from the trigger.

For a solid 2 years they keep giving me gerd meds. Even AFTER I was tested By a gastro Doctor and found not gerd, still given gerd meds for another year. It did nothing Ever. How well does gerd meds work for asthma? What about Sarcoidosis drugs for asthma? What about COPD drugs for asthma? I can confirm they don’t work. So why continue them? Fraud. They knew what was wrong with me and committed fraud.

I have an ICD for asthma attacks. Explain how an ICD works for asthma attacks? Because they explained exactly when I was having high heart rates and I told them. That one cold weather. That one candles. That one smoke. Exactly where I was and exactly who I was with.

Then in the middle of an investigation in NY. My pacemaker was SET to high heart rates To mimic sarcoidosis. It showed not my heart causing high heart rates but the pacemaker itself. So I have Sarcoidosis in my pacemaker. The disease is spreading to objects in my body Somehow. I have proof of that as well. So those saying Sarcoidosis, please explain how it got into my pacemaker?

During this time, I was told my high heart rates are evidence of sarcoidosis in my heart. Prednsione. Prednsione induced diabetes 9.4 A1C, heart failure, kidney failure that my heart Doctor told me, the lung Doctor wanted that. I have recordings.

How does one get Sarcoidosis in their pacemaker? How does one stop having Sarcoidosis in their pacemaker? Because it is not there no more. My version? They set the pacemaker to random high heart rates to fool Medical ethics To a disease they knew I did not have. Or to cover up for the prednsione induced diabetes on purpose the heart Doctor told me. Here is their problem, I started recordings years before this. I have 5 phones going back for over a decade.

I showed UNC I recorded them. They went to their lawyers. They know I had every right to record without their knowledge. If you are going to abuse me, cause fraud, harm me, and or kill me. I think I have a right to at least record it.
 
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Whilst I’m afraid I don’t understand all the ins/outs/specifics of the exact medical language, I do understand what it’s like to be harmed by medical staff (as do many on here).

What is going to be most helpful for you to be able to start to process this? Do you see a therapist you can start unpacking your feelings on this with?

It’s incredibly hard to be hurt by people who are paid to be caring professionals and yet they do the exact opposite and cause a lot of damage & make it extremely difficult to trust. There are people out there who are trustworthy and who can help you with all this.
 
Whilst I’m afraid I don’t understand all the ins/outs/specifics of the exact medical language, I do understand what it’s like to be harmed by medical staff (as do many on here).

What is going to be most helpful for you to be able to start to process this? Do you see a therapist you can start unpacking your feelings on this with?

It’s incredibly hard to be hurt by people who are paid to be caring professionals and yet they do the exact opposite and cause a lot of damage & make it extremely difficult to trust. There are people out there who are trustworthy and who can help you with all this.
I wish to find someone who can do just this. I think my wife said it best, she worked in the medical field. Doctors take care of each other, even the bad ones. Doctors do believe other Doctors and don’t believe their patients.

Since I have been threatened by medical and mental health providers, it would take a medical group who could not care about any repercussions from anyone. Or someone with a deep sense of justice. I think that maybe impossible to find given the time I have to find it. That is I could be triggered at any time. I suppose another asthma sufferer would understand, you can’t avoid all of them.

I keep asking for 2 things at this point. Informed consent. Or to regain what was taken from me: trust.

My wife says there are people out there who can help even you.
 
@MPH

Just for shits & giggles have you ever considered just allowing the doctors to give you whatever diagnosis they want to,give you whatever meds they want to and just go along with all of it for like 6 months to a year and see what happens?

I'm not trying to sound like a jerk but clearly you are not going to get any better or feel any better without any treatment at all. Maybe instead of fighting against them you just cooperate with them and see what happens? What have you got to lose?
 
So given that you think that all Dr's are out to get you and that all therapists can't help you - what are you planning to do to fix your situation?

And how do you think a PTSD forum like this one can be helpful with that?
I think I already addressed this. But I will again. No one here can help me with what is going on. If ethics can’t, how can anyone here. Period.

But I would like to think there is a sliver of hope of going forward. Maybe this site can help with forward at that time. It is not hard to think I will be dead soon and even more so think that is the point of all this.

I recorded the abuse. The Doctor told me to go kill myself. I do know what she wants. That is the reason for in the words of ethics, “screwing“ with me.

Also important, it is not what I think. I have recordings to validate my thoughts.

Here is the thing that bothers me a lot. I just may not be the first. I doubt I will be the last. That gives me pause and others as well. More so the medical community itself. The good Doctors should not have to protect the bad ones. They too have been pressured no doubt in some way. All it takes is one bad apple.

No way should a patient fear repercussions from reporting one bad Doctor. But here I am.

If you have to fear reporting people doing bad things, there is serious problems in the medical field. I have to assume bullying is not limited to patients. To nurses. To techs. To even other Doctors. Since the medical field is self regulated, only they can solve this. I can do nothing, nor can you.

@MPH

Just for shits & giggles have you ever considered just allowing the doctors to give you whatever diagnosis they want to,give you whatever meds they want to and just go along with all of it for like 6 months to a year and see what happens?

I'm not trying to sound like a jerk but clearly you are not going to get any better or feel any better without any treatment at all. Maybe instead of fighting against them you just cooperate with them and see what happens? What have you got to lose?
Jade, I thank you for asking this. I do. I did this For much longer than 6 months. I did for years. Until 2014 when my heart stopped twice. Told not helped on purpose. Told to go kill myself. My guard was put on alert. but I tried still. What do you do when your trust has been ripped from you?

I went to the next person. Doctor keep asking me about my past care. I keep saying the same thing for 45 minute appointment. I would like to go forward. Since I recorded it, that is what I tried. The abuse continued. I started to question the abuse. Speak to mental health people, NOT Doctors. Although mental health professions did talk to Doctors that I asked not to happen.

Unless I was a jerk, I did try what you said. It is like my daughter said, also in medical field, I am tagged. She has seen them in medical records. Doctor tags you somehow with certain words. Gives other Doctors a reason to continue abuse. I think this is why some providers go big time into abuse, while others just dabble at the edges. I think this is why my records go everywhere before I get there. None really give me a chance forward. I think all the damage to my body is the reason. Then mental issues too.

I am totally unable to take anymore abuse in any way. I am afraid of them and I suppose they are afraid of me. My reactions are do to their abuse. I have asked nicely, “why not try not abusing me and see what kind of patient I can be?” Seems like a simple ask.
 
Honestly I have been asked 3 times by 3 different people, why are you here. It seems to me I am not welcome here with my present situation. That is having PTSD and still being being gaslighted by the medical community. I will take my leave. I thank you.
 
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