Meltdown

[whiteraven]

I guess I've been pretty withdrawn the last few weeks. Don't really cry - not even in private (very unusual for me) -, expressions of anger are held in, that sort of thing. Very depressed and I think moreso than usual because I'm not expressing anything. I don't know how anymore. It feels pointless, because there is no one to really hear me.

Well...had a serious meltdown in the middle of the store today. Sobbing and I couldn't stop. When I left work this afternoon (in the pouring down rain), I started having problems with my car. I *had* to go to the store to get food for the cats, so I stopped there. Barely made it. All I could think was that I was going to have to take (or have it towed) it in to have it looked at and I don't have the money and I am not going to be able to drive it on Monday, when I have the first appointment back to my therapist and a massage therapy appointment (which has been the only thing to help my pain and breathing) and a mammogram that I've been putting off.

It seems that whenever I work to do something for myself, something happens to interfere.

 

[Muttly]

I'm sorry your car broke down and you have all the stress. I totally understand that feeling, that whenever you take a step, life sends more crap. I hope you can be gentle with yourself. Try to take one thing at a time.

 

[Still Standing]

Yes, it seems when we are struggling emotionally, the world seems to fall apart. I am so sorry. All I can say is that though the problems loom heavily over your head, right now, it will all get worked out somehow. That is how life is, isn't it. This moment in time seems like it ganged up on you. Problem solve one thing at a time. Transportation is the most important. Are you able to take public transportation? If not, and you have to miss your T and massage appointments, remember it will not be the end of the world...a big disappointment, yes, but not a life-altering situation. Hang in there. Breathe. And see what you can do to figure out how to fix the car.

 

[Joan]

So sorry....that is so hard and such a struggle. Sucks when you are trying to care for yourself and life interferes. Hope that it is a quick fix and you can care for yourself.

 

[whiteraven]

Thanks, @Still Standing. Agreed with (al)most everything you said here and I think you for the reminder.

On one point;

but not a life-altering situation.

actually, it could be.

 

[Freida]

Oh I'm so sorry hun --- that just sucks. No words of wisdom, just hugs... :hug:

 

[shimmerz]

I don't know about you, but my car means I am no longer dependent on others. There is great significance to my car getting messed up. It is a stress beyond all stresses, in my opinion.

I get it. I am so sorry this has happened.

 

[Deleted member 44579]

Fear... And freezing.. And in a mindset of everything being wrong. I think that there will always be some kind of trouble or pain in lives.... Not all the time.
What do you enjoy doing,? What did you used to do the made you happy.

Sometimes we just have to withdraw from life. And that's OK...
Give yourself time, medication... Maybe. Support from everyone here. And don't be too hard on yourself... Take care

.

 

[whiteraven]

I don't know about you, but my car means I am no longer dependent on others. There is great significance to my car getting messed up. It is a stress beyond all stresses, in my opinion.

I get it. I am so sorry this has happened.

Yes! Thank you. It's a huge, huge thing for me.

What do you enjoy doing,? What did you used to do the made you happy.

Right now I don't enjoy anything. None of what I used to do is in any way pleasurable for me anymore.