My Cat Is Slowly Dying And It Is Destroying Me

[Knak]

Oh, @Knak - my heart goes out to you.

When I adopted my Buddy in 2013, I knew he...

Thank you for your sincere understanding and feedback. It has given me some energy to know you have faced the same lengthy anguish and I am not alone. I imagine if I talk to him about it I would just cry and that wouldn't interest him.

You are right I know I am over emphasizing finding food but don't know how to change my thinking or behavior and need to learn how to trick him because he generally has the last word. I know he's not ready to go. This is where I have no confidence. I assume PM goes through your profile?

I also have a hard time knowing when there is nothing left to do and feel like I am treading water now. If he was like my other cats were I'd know it was time or past time.

I will try the PM.

 

[Knak]

I don't know if you're buying into that or not. If you are, I think there's a "problem" with your think...

Yes my husband has an attachment disorder or else is a narcissist and his comment was meaningless. He has to copy behavior from others to appear relevant. You are funny. My cat has been more loving, affectionate, a companion and gives me positive feedback vs. negative.

You are right about the it's transference of my feeling onto him. If I don't pay attention to him he will hide and I think it is cruel but maybe he doesn't care, except the other cat feels dominant when he is weak and picks on him and I don't want that for him. I let him know he is important to give him motivation to interact because he enjoys it. I saw a post there's proof that interaction with a dog replaces the need to interact with people. I probably use him for that too since I'm afraid of people without my meds.

I can only wish I could detach myself from him as a substitute for a human relationship. The trade-off for being responsible for my cat's life is that he is not capable of deliberate emotional malice.

 

[Knak]

From what you've written: he is starving and can't eat. it sounds like your beloved kitty is suffering....

I wish the vet would have said that but she said she didn't think it was time and once he got medication and an IV he was himself - the difficulty finding something he will eat is worse for me because it is defeating.

 

[Heather]

I'm sorry you're going through this knak.... maybe you're kitty has fight left. I'm glad he got meds and rallied.

Hugs

 

[Stickler]

Ask the vet for mirtazepine. It's used for cats. it is an antidepressant. It gives them the munchies. It does the same for humans, too, but as cats are obligate carnivores, your kitty will likely start chowing down.
It should not be too expensive and the cat won't require much.
You can probably get it cheaply online from an online pet pharmacy.
Plus antidepressants CAN actually help with chronic pain in humans.
Presumably with cats as well.

I also recommend absolutely no kibble. I recommend stinky stuff. Tuna, salmon, sardines, a little fish oil. Add some cooked sweet potato and a variety of greens
Just no onions or garlic.
Add calcium powder and a daily pet vitamin. Purée that mess and feed that to him.
Cats' sense of smell gets less keen as they age.
Besides that, fish oil IS anti-inflammatory, you're dealing with an inflammatory bowel disorder.
Use JUST THE ABOVE.
He might have a food allergy, the above should be pretty safe.
If you have to vary, stick to ocean fish and cooked veggies.

You've checked his teeth, right?
Ask the vet if it's appropriate to give the cat a low dose of prednisone when the cat has a flare-up, and if so, do it.
Prednisone's cheap.

That's my semi-educated advice regarding the cat.

What your husband said regarding Satan strikes me as a spot of spiritual abuse.
Just my opinion.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

If I chose to have him put down for my sake it seems like I am ruthlessly murdering some innocent being.

I wouldnt quite put it that way. Ive volunteered in animal rescue for many years until i had my accident and had to stop due to pain. We've had to euthenize many and its the kindest thing one can do for a suffering animal. Letting the animal suffer is ruthless if you had to put a label to that.

I feel like he is starving to death at an exceedingly slow rate

That might be whats happening, though you still arent responsible, you are responsible to find that time where he is needlessly starving to either inevidably die or suffer. In that time, the kindest thing you could give him is to end the suffering via euthensia.

It isnt an easy decision, i own 2 cats both rescued that ive had for 11 yrs and a dog rescued ive had for 4 yrs. All i deeply love and never want to leave me but when the time comes that either are suffering needlessly then i am prepared to put them down, as hard as that will be.

 

[Knak]

Ask the vet for mirtazepine. It's used for cats. it is an antidepressant. It gives them the munchies....

He gets mirtzapine and it worked before but no more. His diet history is a book in itself and he never would eat fish or food with it in it. I am aware of the smell factor. I had a smart vet tech as his babysitter who gave lots of helpful ideas.
He gets teeth cleaned, x rays and removal of infected teeth yearly and he is on prednilosone now, a lower permanent dose than before when he rallied. Also just had 5 or 6 meds going at once with IVs 2x week for kidneys plus B12 now.
Thanks for your concern and advice, and input of my husband's comment. He isn't all there but is abusive at times and purposely obtuse.

 

[Stickler]

Ah...:(. That's not good on the cat front, not at all.
Or the husband front.

 

[anonymous]

Have you tried a raw diet?

Several years ago, Lynne Ackman of Chicago began making food at home for her five rescue cats. She had tried kibble and canned food to treat one’s inflammatory bowel disease and another’s diabetes, but it wasn’t until she adopted a raw diet of rabbit and fowl that their health dramatically improved, she says.

This site also includes receipes both fully raw and cooked raw, its also cheaper. It also states:

you can’t find a supportive veterinarian and you are determined to go raw, go to www.catnutrition.org or www.petdiets.com, both of which provide detailed information.

Also before you decide to do this, walmart includes a refregerated section with food that is very balanced, doesnt include by-products or any bad things, and is done professionally so the measurements are correct. If you havent, id try that first. Dont buy bulk of that as it doesnt keep very long.

Here is the site (receipes start on page 3. I did cooked as it keeps longer. You can freeze both and take out what you need for the week or a few days and keep it in the refrigerater):

http://pets.webmd.com/cats/guide/homemade-cat-food-and-raw-cat-food?

Make sure you include taurine, cats musthave that and gind bones to a powder for most of the other nurtion. Also states she doesnt advise it to her vet as they tend to be anti-homemade and anti-raw though proven better. Most vets Ive been to know zero about nurtrion and get paid to promote science diet prescription food which is horrible for animals as it includes by-products and a bunch of other horrible stuff. I always asked what it was the cat needed to be added or taken away in their diet and id add it or take it out. I also and crushed any prescription pills they needed in a pill crusher and add it and even if it was already nurtious enough, Id include a multi-vitimin just in case and it doesnt hurt.

Also, remember that animals get human medication, just in a diffierent dose so a lot of walmarts are filling animal meds. Call walmarts around you and any pharmacy and see if anyone does and if so ask the vet for a written prescription instead. It is way way cheaper.

Hope this helps!

 

[joeylittle]

Also states she doesnt advise it to her vet as they tend to be anti-homemade and anti-raw though proven better.

Just an opposite perspective - the last few vets I've had were very open to raw diets, and both expressed that it was just important to be careful with handling.

I think a great deal depends on what animals your vet actually owns. Now, whenever I'm looking for one, I ask who in the practice is the 'cat person', (or whatever) and usually find them to be overall more up to speed on everything from nutrition to behavior.

I initially tried to put Buddy on raw, before he got sick and it was contra-indicated. He straight up would not go for it - my very-recently-unowned-tomcat rescue cat wouldn't eat raw. I was kind of surprised. But apparently, switching is often a process.

 

[Knak]

Have you tried a raw diet?
This site also includes receipes both fully raw and cooked raw, its als...

Yes for a short time - chicken with bones and organs with the taurine. He licked the juice is all. The Walmart food in the icebox he would not touch.

The next day he received dry duck/pea kibble and the vet said to give it without other food and he ate it for a few weeks, one of the longest besides dry venison.

I tried it again when nothing worked and he didn't touch it. Lately I ground some chicken breast and he didn't touch it.

By his spacey eyes I think it's too late, but he surprised me by eating some new treats we got tonight and tomorrow he gets an IV. It is just time I think. He's had everything. It would be a sad relief, but he's not himself more often and I believe he will go to heaven. I am trying to spend time with him sleeping on me and petting him.

When his eyes won't stop looking dazed I want him to go.

Thank you for the lengthy information. I was anxious to try it and bought a lot but gave it to a friend who uses it. If they are anything it is picky.

 

[Knak]

Just an opposite perspective - the last few vets I've had were very open to raw diets, and both expr...

I should never have given any treats. I knew it would make them unhappy with eating a single food and it changed my life for the worst.