My therapist resigned

[Nessa7]

I am sorry that you are going through this. I know I would be devastated if I was in your shoes. At the very least, you did get to have that final appointment with her and get her recommendation for your next therapist. I think it is great that you can use the tools she taught you to get through this. I would be proud of you if I was your t.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

I really appreciate the supportive words. Thank you everyone. I'm feeling better now than I did the other day but, I keep finding my mind going back to it. I see my new therapist next week. That sentence still feels weird. And my therapist is still there until the end of the month. I'm thinking there is a chance I'll see her. It makes me sad to even think of it. I might even hear her voice if she's in the office that day since her office is down the hall from my new therapist's office. She pointed it out to me as we were leaving her office the other day.

I think on some level I stopped processing it. I think of her and shake it off. I just pictured myself in the new office trying to feel comfortable in the wrong room just down the hall from the right room. And knowing she might be in there. It kind of feels like oil and water. I know it's there. It has it's own feelings. It's just not blending. Like it's something someone said to me hypothetically. Except it's real and I won't really know it or feel it until I'm sitting there looking at a stranger who wants to talk about my feelings.

My therapist did tell me I can call her this week if I'm having a hard time. I've been thinking about that since the other day. Everyday I think the same thing. "Maybe. Maybe tomorrow". On the one hand we closed it nicely and if I call is it picking the scab off? If I don't call am I going to think about it forever? Maybe it would be better to call instead of wonder. Really all I want to ask her to say again is why she didn't tell me last week. Circles. I start thinking about this and I start going in circles. Processing. I don't like it. And with all of these thoughts I'm still sad about this and it still hurts. And the shock might be almost as bad as it changing.

 

[ladee]

I am so sorry this ended this way. But from the way you are processing this, you and she did some awesome work.. and you did the hard stuff with her... what a beautiful thing to add to your gratitude list. If you do call, I hope it's to tell her how much she helped you. And that she will live in your life forever because of the impact she had on your healing work....

I still her my favorite T's voice in my head, or see her smile.. or see her get quite when I was sharing the hard stuff... I was the one that ended the sessions, and SHE was hurt... I ended it because I needed more than what we were doing... I feel I made a mess telling her goodbye... but I did write her letters for a long time... maybe you can email her once in awhile... stay in touch...

And it's so hard to not feel betrayed... to some degree, but she may not have known last week when she saw you... I hate it that it doesn't get to be a two way street with our T's , but I also understand why. And I know it was very very hard for her to tell you she was leaving... She is still very invested in you... let her know how you are doing if you have some way to contact her in the future....

You are feeling what needs to be felt, that is your perfect goodbye to her... doing the things she taught you to do... and like has been said, you can do the grief work with the new T.... she would not have recommended someone she didn't think would be all you need... this is so hard.... but you learned a lot from this woman. Doesn't take away the feelings... I wonder if she is setting home crying wondering how you are???

 

[Rose White]

She was truly overloaded... She's taking a break. And after that she might not get back into therapy.

The best part about that is that it is 100% not about you.

I would be proud of you if I was your t.

I would too, and I bet yours is really proud of you.

If you do call, I hope it's to tell her how much she helped you. And that she will live in your life forever because of the impact she had on your healing work....

I wonder if she is setting home crying wondering how you are???

I second this, if you call, drop a gratitude bomb—you both deserve it after all the good hard work you put in. Plus, it sounds like she is wiped out and would appreciate the validation.

 

[ButterflyBean]

Really all I want to ask her to say again is why she didn't tell me last week.

This reminded me of an experience I had a few years ago. A bit different than yours but still relevant. I ended things with an old therapist very abruptly. Looking back, I realize now that some form of closure is essential to doing the grief work. The way your therapist told you she was leaving may not have been perfect, but at least you had a conversation. However, if there is anything you need to say or ask, like the question above, I strongly encourage you to do so. You may not like her response, but at least you will have a starting place with the new therapist. Unfinished emotional business with anyone, but especially someone you shared intimate details of your life with, may be difficult to work through because there will be unanswered questions, and your new therapist cannot speak for your old one. I hope you get the chance to say everything you need to say. I also think writing a letter is the next best thing. Even though it may not seem like it, you are doing an awesome job working through some unfortunate circumstances, so be gentle with yourself!

 

[Teasel]

So sorry for the pain this is causing you. Such admiration for the way you are coping with it. Can understand the quandary of whether it will be picking at the scab to phone her this week. At the same time the need for closure and knowing she is around for a few more weeks must really be adding to the pain of it. I hope you come to a decision that works for you in the best way. And hope you get on with your new T too. :hug:

 

[hithere]

I'm so very sorry. I can't imagine the loss and pain you are feeling. You are doing the right thing: feeling it. It hurts. so. bad.

 

[recoveringfromptsd]

I am so sorry that happened to you, it is always hard when you spend so much time and effort building communication and a relationship with your therapist and an understanding of what makes you you, only for it to end before your ready.

 

[Muttly]

wow, that would be really hard to deal with. I am sorry it's happening so fast and there wasn't a lot of warning. I am also sending support your way

 

[Friday]

And now begins the grieving. And I have chosen to put into use the tools she has taught me to get through it.

Love this! Good on :)

 

[amymuse]

Today I walked into therapy just like any other day. I sat down and exchanged greetings with m...

That is heartless and unprofessional: To tell you the same session that this is your last. It would destroy me to experience that. It would be a shock on top of

 

[amymuse]

a

.. everything I have to deal with. It would destroy my trust. How can your therapist do that? I don't understand it. Hope you are strong enough to cope.