Sufferer Need Help And Looking For Answers

[KDZ]

Don't know where to really start so I guess the beginning is always good.

I can not remember much of my childhood just bits and pieces. I was just 9 when the next door neighbor molested me and I was 15 when I got married and was pregnant about 2 years later and then 16 months had another and 18 months had another and split from husband so many times can not count on 2 hands how many.

We got back together and everything was starting to work out when our 3 year little girl was killed by hit and run, both boys saw it along with my Dad who died 15 months later of liver cancer.

I have pulled my hair since the death of our daughter and still do to this day even after I tell myself that I am strong enough and I can not let this win. I also started to hurt my self by cutting and hitting myself. I go days with out pulling or even hurting. But the reason why I am here now is cause now I am hurting myself in dreams (nightmares). I just need to talk so I hope this will help

 

[Brad1980]

Welcome,
My mother buried two of her children one was 2 and one was 8. It took her a long time to get better. You can get better. I buried 5 family member before I was 12. I would encourage you to find some professional help. Grief sucks the life out you. I'm sorry your little girl died. You can heal from this. Life will never be the same but it can still be worthwhile again. Good luck with your journey. I hope you find some peace.

 

[Phenioxrising]

You can turn around your dreams. Look up Lucid dreams and realize that you can learn and teach yourself to get control of your dreams.

Talk about what happened after the hit and run. Also bring up all your good memories about your daughter.

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

 

[Jlso111187]

Hi, Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry about the loss of your daughter. Losing a child is NEVER easy.

 

[Loloma]

Hello KDZ and welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear of the loss of your daughter and the past traumas you have been through. I am sure you will find help and support on this forum. :hug:

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

I'm so sorry, KDZ! I lost a daughter, and recently lost my father. Grief is so hard, and different for everyone. I would never have recovered from my little girl's death without professional help. It's just too much alone.

. Grief sucks the life out you. I'm sorry your little girl died. You can heal from this. Life will never be the same but it can still be worthwhile again.

Truly, life will be different, but you can still enjoy it. It takes a lot of work, using different tools (therapy, medications) but it is very worth it. Keep telling yourself you can get past this, and that you are strong! It is true! You've survived a lot already.

Prayers & blessings being sent to you! Don't give up!!

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum.

 

[zymogram]

KDZ I am so glad you are here. Hugs- if that is ok. Self injury is a powerful coping mechanism, but a negative one and often it does not last long before guilt and embarrassment set in.

When you are having the urges try to distract yourself with something that is self soothing. Music, a bath, walk, a comedy on television or whatever makes you feel something different-holding a ice cube. Is it ok to ask if you are seeing a therapist?

May you find comfort here.

 

[intothelight]

Welcome to the PTSD Forum! :)