Sufferer Need To Connect With Something Outside Of My Head.

[Lady of Longbourn]

Hello and welcome to the forum. :)

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

In my humble opinion, use whatever you need to help to stay in the moment. For me it is a Moss Agate Turtle, also essential lemon oil. I don't care why it works or if it is in the mind - it helps me and that is all that matters.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

I really thought that a rock was so random, but now I see that you all have a little something it makes me feel not so alien. And so many of them have a stone element to them. I wonder if that little bit of the world in your hands holds you to it, keeps you spinning with it. Thank you.

KP is the lemon oil particularly strong smelling or just the smell? I feel the need for something to shock me back sometimes and any strength against a sense might help.

 

[KP the nut]

KP is the lemon oil particularly strong smelling or just the smell? I feel the need for something to shock me back sometimes and any strength against a sense might help.

For me, the scent of lemon seems to 'zap' my mind back into the present and helps to keep me grounded. Amethist started this thread which helps me and others a lot.
[DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/aromatherapy-that-may-help-relieve-some-ptsd-symptoms.13571/[/DLMURL]

Also, this thread on grounding.
[DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/grounding-101.12459/[/DLMURL]

 

[a3a2]

I see that you all have a little something

LOL! I no longer use that pliable little ball, but I realized reading this that I rub my cell phone when I am tense!

 

[safenow]

a vision quest or vision fast is the practice of fasting out in the wilderness alone for a few days.

When I was able to do so, we would go up high into the mountains, with nothing but a few survival items. When the world was closing in on me, sometiems we would spend as much as two weeks up there. Just to be able to get un-people-polluted. You are right. It works wonders for the mind, body, and spirit.

usually when I look up, even if I'm in my room I feel lost and confused, which is my fear for safenow's form, but I'll tackle that if/when it becomes a problem

If you don't mind, I'm going to give you another things to do. Be sure to check out KP's inforamtion on aromatherapy. Good stuff that. If you practice what i'm about to share with you before you need it, it will help you to do so quickly.

Visually, focus on the color of objects in your immediate environment (“it’s green,” “long and sharp” etc.) Keep your eyes open, and take note of where you are. Look for 5 colors in your immediate environment.

Tactilely, do touch objects close to you and describe the experience in detail. Touch something cold, warm, or hot and describe the sensory experience. (4 objects)

Auditory, do focus on identifying the various sounds you’re hearing at the present time. (3 sounds)

Olfactory, do become aware of the various smells in your immediate environment. (2 scents)

Gustatory, do think back at something you recently tasted, or select something to eat and describe the taste. (1 taste)

Do use self-soothing approaches:

Talk to your self in a reassuring language, reminding your self of who you are, where you are, and where you’re going.

Say compassionate things to your self.

Thank you for sharing your healing journal with me.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

Thank you for sharing your healing journal with me.

What is a healing journal, is it these posts? If so thank you very much for taking the time for reading, not only that but responding. If it's something else how did I share it with you, I don't mind sharing, in fact I want to, but how did I do it and how can I do it again or can I just leave it public.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

I've just got back from the session with my Social Worker, I don't really remember a lot of it, but I think it was helpful because I feel much calmer now. He said it was ok if I sleep until I can get help, that made me cry, I was scared I wasn't allowed to, or I shouldn't but I didn't know what else to do. I know he read my letter and he said that I write well. I know he said that I should have shown my rambling page of words and eyes on my Monday session with the doctor (I did bring it but didn't show it). I know he said if the therapy with the external people didn't work I could get therapy with the Beacon themselves. I know he asked me a lot of questions and tried to talk to me but I couldn't understand all of it or a lot of what he was saying. He said I should write more if it helps but if/when it doesn't help or if/when it makes it worse that I don't have to and I should just try to focus on doing what I want and what I need to stay ok. I'm still very confused and scared but less so. I'm still worried, but I am calmer. I think I can wait until Tuesday for my assessment and he's given me numbers to phone if I need to. But I can't think out loud and talk easily. But I'll try if I need to. I'm going to stop talking now. Thank you for reading.

AJ
xx

 

[intothelight]

Hi AJ,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum!:)

You've gotten a lot of great advice in the responses to your introduction. I hope that you find the information on this site helpful as you work on managing your symptoms until you are able to see a therapist. The support on this site is amazing as you work towards healing.

Wishing you the best.

Debbie

 

[safenow]

What is a healing journal, is it these posts?

Kas_Can_Fly, When you share on this forum about what you are doing to help yourself, you are in reality helping us all to heal. Too many times most of us have been told to 'shut up', or 'suck it up' or 'you must nuts' or 'get over it' or 'I don't want to hear it" or "your a liar". Most people in the world admit bad things happen, but forget they happen to real people. and it takes a long time to get over things that happen to us. It doesn't matter if you are young when it starts or an adult or even an elderly person.

We live in a scary world. That is a fact I doubt anyone can deny. But even so, we can support each other. For those of us who have suffered horrendous things, we can in turn reach out and help others know they are heard. They are not alone in this journal through life. Just that fact alone can help so many people and has such a healing effect on us.

A lot of times we think we are the only ones who feel a certain way. We blame ourselves for what others taught us. But together we can stand a mighty force for good against evil. Alone, it's hard to do. But together, we can do this.

Anyway, I'm off my soap box now. Just wanted to answer your question.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

I'm sure no one else will find this as funny as I did (I did cry at the same time), but I found a reel of "FRAGILE" tape knocking around last night and it was too true. You've all been very helpful keeping me here in the real world (the online world counts too). So thank you all.

 

[71nothing]

Kas_Can_Fly,
Welcome to the forum. What a well written introduction of yourself. I relate to so much you have written.

My head's doing things I can't explain and I keep going from feeling every last drop of fear to feeling nothing, not even the world around me. I'm really lost and could do with a friend.

I often don't understand what's going on inside of my head but I've found that being on this forum helps to "normalize" it for me. Then I don't have the double anxiety of dealing with PTSD but also worrying incessently that something is wrong with me that I can't "fix."

I can't explain what that feels like because I know life doesn't just stop, but that's how it feels, maybe I'd have a heart attack or maybe I'd just dissociate permanently and never come back.

I've written about this to my therapist many times. I'm not suicidal. I would never end my life intentionally. I feel like I just want to be in a permanent "sleep" state until I am "fixed." I know it's not rational, or reasonable to think these things will just go away but when I'm especially down or detached I hope for it and see it as the best option.

Also my head keeps stopping me from crying, but I feel that it would make some room in my head, just for a while, earlier I managed to start (not that that's necessarily a good thing) but it stopped me mid-flow and then I dissociated in front of my mum. I usually hide it from her because it freaks her out a bit. Now I'm numb and can't really access much.

Crying would be such a great release wouldn't it? My head automatically stops me from crying as well. I think for me that as much as I know that crying would be a good release and a healthy response to situations, I also see it as unsafe. I have it ingrained in my head the crying = weakness = vulnerability. I don't want to be any of those things because it puts me at risk. Again, I know it's not a rational belief system but it's just one I've created and have a hard time shedding.

I hope you don't have to wait too long after your intake assessment to begin therapy. I understand putting it off and then suddenly needing it now! I'm glad you took the time to write out your thoughts to share. I've been in therapy for two years. I can talk with my therapist fairly easily until it comes to anything trauma related, dissociation, or feelings. Then I find that my head and mouth just can't work together to form words and express them. I use writing to communicate with her and more recently we've actually been reading the writing during a session. This has been hard for me because I hate hearing my thoughts out loud. It forces me to process them.

I hope you find the support you are looking for here. There are many supportive people who understand what you are going through.