Not Sure About My New Therapist... Help? Comments?

[kittiekittie]

So I met with my new therapist today, and told her that in the past I had been diagnosed with PTSD. Basically she simply asked me if I had dreams or flashbacks and I am aware of what the diagnostic criteria is. She essentially said that I am not PTSD anymore, though I may still have some symptoms. I kind of don't really understand that? So poof I am cured because I don't have flashbacks now? For a doctoral psychologist that sort of seemed like an odd thing to say.

I am most definitely not in an acute phase, but the majority of PTSD literature I have read is only regarding current recent trauma. I have been unable to find any good resources for what it is like say ten years later.

If I don't have PTSD anymore but have some symptoms, then what am I exactly? It doesn't change or shatter my identity or anything don't get me wrong, but I don't personally believe that it is simply that cut and dry. After a period of time regardless of the continuation of some symptoms, you just cease to be PTSD?

I sort of wanted to walk right out there and then. For the remainder of the appointment I mainly felt like the focus is not on helping me feel better or dealing with the issues I am having so much as getting me through the system fast.

 

[Abstract]

Hi Kittie,

This is one of the situations where I think labels are not very helpful. Not very helpful for you in this situation. We are all different.

I kind of don't really understand that?

then what am I exactly?

This is how I understand it. Technically unless you fit the criteria, including frequency (so many of symptom * per week for the last month) then you are no longer suffering with PTSD. Some people will stay above that level symptom wise 10 years later.

But that isn't really the whole story as once the injury is there then things can set it off again and regardless, even if you are sub clinical symptom wise presently, having the remaining symptoms can be very debilitating. But the animal is still the same animal if that makes sense.

She is looking at this clinically (it would probably be classed as an anxiety disorder now) but I think the label isn't important and what is important is healing. In terms of that there is no difference. You still need to do the same things to get better.

Maybe you can use this as a way to be encouraged? That you fight the symptoms and be free of this illness in that respect at least? I hope you can also tell her how you feel about this and why.

 

[franciemarnie]

I would have felt exactly the same as you - wanting to walk out then and there. Trust your reality. No one knows it but you. I have a problem with her dismissing your previous diagnosis after so little time with you. You will know if this person will be helpful to you. I sure hope she is. But if not, perhaps there are alternatives. Wishing you best of luck. A great therapist is always a boon.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I would have copped an attitude right then and there and have said "well, since I don't have PTSD anymore I have no need for you" and walked out. How dismissive.

 

[dms]

ScaredOfLonely-I'm laughing my head off!!

 

[rightkindofme]

I would have reacted like SoL. "Oh, then good thing I don't need you!"

I would not react well to that. I think I am overly attached to the label at this point if I am honest with myself. It gives me an ongoing reason to be nice to myself and have patience when I am struggling. If I didn't have the "It's ok that this is hard--look at what happened to my brain" I think I would not be able to control my self-loathing given how hard "normal" things are for me sometimes.

Believing that I have PTSD means that I have hard days instead of "I am pathetic". Not sure I am handling this as best I can but I am a lot nicer to myself now.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

RKoM is spot on. If I didn't have my diagnosis anymore then I think I would be a bit lost. I'd feel a need to just suck it up and get on with my life. At least with this label I can say "ok, I need to do X, Y, and Z to take care of myself" and not feel guilty about it.

 

[Lucycat]

I guess I am in the same boat. I am sure if I went to see a new therapist today, I would not get the CPTSD label I carry. However knowing that I have been diagnosed means that I am kinder to myself when the going gets tough.

If I am struggling I know why. If I no longer had the CPTSD to blame for the bad days, then I think I would feel that it is all my fault and I should get over it.

Since diagnosis I have learned so much about myself, and about thoughts, feelings and anxiety. I used to work every overtime hour available just because I was asked and didn't want to let anybody down. I used to push myself so hard and try to be everybody's friend yet have incredibly low self esteem. Now I take care of me. I pace myself and find more enjoyment in life.

Everything has changed, but I know how vulnerable and fragile the status quo is. It does not take much for me to have ridiculous anxiety over trivia, but simply knowing this is the illness makes it bearable. I think it helps Rory too, to understand why I behave as I do - sometimes.

 

[kittiekittie]

Thanks everybody! I have a hard time knowing whether or not I am overreacting or being reasonable and wanted some feedback from people who kind of know what I am dealing with. It did feel really dismissive and invalidating to me, especially because at this point she really doesn't know anything about me. I've seen two doctoral psychologists before this one, and nobody has ever just said to me oh well you don't have ptsd anymore.

I mean if I am still having lingering symptoms how can you simply attribute it to something else when it stems from traumas I have survived over the years? I am okay with being re-diagnosed that's fine - but she treated me kind of like I am a dunce. Also, the diagnostic criteria regarding flashbacks and so forth are not really something that really addresses the physiological responses and changes in my nervous system. My last therapist said that my limbic system was totally out of whack and that was something I would need to work on.

But apparently nothing is wrong with me and I don't have PTSD anymore so I am cured guys! *throws out medication*

I mean for example I have the following and have for basically the entire time since:

- Intense psychological distress at exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

- Physiologic reactivity upon exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event

- Sense of foreshortened future (e.g., does not expect to have a career, marriage, children, or a normal life span)

- Difficulty falling or staying asleep

-Irritability or outbursts of anger

- Difficulty concentrating

- Hyper-vigilance

- Exaggerated startle response

- and recently diagnosed with IBS, and I've read that this is linked to PTSD and domestic violence (which is what I have experienced among other things

So I find it kind of difficult to believe that I am not still suffering effects of PTSD. I am going to give her one more appointment but she so far seems kind of bogus to me. I expected a lot more professionalism from someone with a phd.

Thank you all for your help and comments, I really appreciate it.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Do you have emotional flashbacks?

 

[kittiekittie]

I have a re-occurring nightmare - but nothing while I am awake.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Oh well emotional flashbacks aren't like nightmares---there's nothing visual. It's just a "flashback" on purely an emotional level.