FragileGlass
Silver Member
My partner had been fantastic and supportive when I hit lows in the past. Unfortunately she is now becoming a source of stress. She's assumed that she has the knowledge to attempt preventing triggers without understanding the true source of my stressors. In truth I don't really have any way of knowing what will trigger me.
I work in an Emerge unit on the security team. My events are so diverse that there really isn't any particular trigger. However I do know that it's the personalization of the moment. The victim, family members, the interactions with Paramedics and police in some cases. A lot of detail comes out making a more personal connection to the event. These scenarios are difficult and do cause stress over the long term, but my actual stressor are 'frequent fliers' people I interact with often. Sometimes daily for many months. You get to know them too well or too much understanding of their crisis. In a lot cases the long term for these patients do not end well. I'm left with months of conversations, interactions, negative and positive memories, I know their history and watched the build up to their eventual death.
As of late, my partner is scrutinizing what I watch on TV, asking if it's a good idea if I watch an ER or hospital based show. Or recently a documentary surfaced on a family dealing with a suicide and instantly told me I shouldn't watch it. She doesn't realize that these shows can cause reminders, but don't trigger me because it's not a moment I've interacted with. However seeing these things help normalize or help me see that what I see and work with is consistent and in many cases not as bad as what other ER units deal with. Or recently I was invited to a family fireworks event. She was saying we shouldn't go because it could stress me. I've dealt with firearms issues, seen guns drawn, no firearm has ever been discharged in my presence. Fireworks will not send me into the woods in fear.
Then she reads news events of my hospital and asks me if I had any part of it. Or let's me know if she catches the obituary of a person who passed in my hospital. Those are the things that will send me into the woods because the less I know about my patients the better off I am.
I just don't even know where or how to fix any of this. Conversations go over her head because she truly does not understand how her behaviour is stressing me more than some of the events now.
I work in an Emerge unit on the security team. My events are so diverse that there really isn't any particular trigger. However I do know that it's the personalization of the moment. The victim, family members, the interactions with Paramedics and police in some cases. A lot of detail comes out making a more personal connection to the event. These scenarios are difficult and do cause stress over the long term, but my actual stressor are 'frequent fliers' people I interact with often. Sometimes daily for many months. You get to know them too well or too much understanding of their crisis. In a lot cases the long term for these patients do not end well. I'm left with months of conversations, interactions, negative and positive memories, I know their history and watched the build up to their eventual death.
As of late, my partner is scrutinizing what I watch on TV, asking if it's a good idea if I watch an ER or hospital based show. Or recently a documentary surfaced on a family dealing with a suicide and instantly told me I shouldn't watch it. She doesn't realize that these shows can cause reminders, but don't trigger me because it's not a moment I've interacted with. However seeing these things help normalize or help me see that what I see and work with is consistent and in many cases not as bad as what other ER units deal with. Or recently I was invited to a family fireworks event. She was saying we shouldn't go because it could stress me. I've dealt with firearms issues, seen guns drawn, no firearm has ever been discharged in my presence. Fireworks will not send me into the woods in fear.
Then she reads news events of my hospital and asks me if I had any part of it. Or let's me know if she catches the obituary of a person who passed in my hospital. Those are the things that will send me into the woods because the less I know about my patients the better off I am.
I just don't even know where or how to fix any of this. Conversations go over her head because she truly does not understand how her behaviour is stressing me more than some of the events now.
