Physiotherapy/massage Work After Severe Sexual Abuse

[super_saiyan]

Has anybody has any experience of massages after trauma? If so, in what ways has it helped? Or not helped of course.

Has been suggested to me and am considering it and have a trusted physiotherapist but am terrified of any skin to skin contact. Want to learn to accept my body and explore safe touch etc.

Thank you.

 

[Chava]

If you have a physiotherapist you trust, can you just try some light massage with clothes on? (like a light t-shirt, not bulky sweatshirt) Not sure what that person is treating you for, but working with just those muscle groups to start? Maybe just 15 minutes?

I can't do massage because it increases my pain...that's a little separate from what you are describing, but I have looked up local spas and some have several options, like light touch, keeping clothes on, 30 min. or short massages, or even warm stone massage (just setting the heated stones on your skin). I think I would let someone set warm stones on my back. And for me that might be a starting point. Anyway, you don't have to go for a full blown massage. Ask your physiotherapist if there is a range of options and something you could start out very gently, even without skin-skin contact.

 

[rainbow1]

I have a physio i've worked with a lot and trust completely. He doesn't know about my trauma but he knows that when we first met I was exceptionally anxious and flinched at every touch. My reason for going was really to get rid of the pain I was in physically so it was very treatment based rather than for relaxation. What type of massage are you thinking about?

The physio worked on building up my trust by asking me if it was ok to touch my arm or back or wherever he was working on and also explained what it would feel like. So if he was doing a stretch of my legs he would tell me it would feel tight in my calf or thigh or whatever. That really helped. But, it was weird to feel connected to my body in that way again and to 'know' what things felt like.

Sometimes it made me feel sad or angry or frightened but he is very accepting of however I was doing and worked around my emotional responses. I have found it to be very helpful in me getting to know what my body feels like again and just being more present in it.

 

[Biz]

I second what @Chava and @rainbow1 said. If you find someone you can trust, it could be positive.

I get bodywork to help with my touch sensitivity/fear. I've been working with this for almost 2 years. It's been super helpful, also very triggering. The first 6 months I couldn't stand it and could barely say anything. I would finish, curl up on the table, and cry on the drive home. My practitioner is incredible and has trauma training and a lot of awareness and empathy. I'm so grateful for that. I went to practitioners before who weren't trauma-sensitive and had a couple of shaming experiences.

Really do your research on the practitioner and make sure he or she is willing to sit with whatever may come up for you. Also make sure they have good boundaries (mine does but I still worry and I could see some re-enactments happening if she didn't). And then work a system with him or her, like Rainbow wrote about. My practitioner tells me where she will touch, does, then asks if it's okay. We kind of had to make this system as we worked because I kept jumping when she'd touch me without warning or move her hands.

Also, consider if massage is the best method or maybe look in to others. My practitioner says she thinks massage is too deep, physically for folks with trauma and has a lot of force in its method that isn't always healing for people who have experienced trauma. She does Rosen Method; it's very soft. I hear Alexander Technique is too.

Good luck! I hope your experience is healing.

 

[Chava]

My practitioner says she thinks massage is too deep, physically for folks with trauma

This is interesting. I know it's not everyone's experience. But I have chronic pain and muscle spasms. With regular massage and someone trying to work out those knots, I end up in more pain or...in the one session where I left feeling relaxed and like the pain and knots had been released...I felt horribly suicidal a few hours later. It's like my whole defense was broken down. So, I think it also requires understanding if part of the pain is at all anything like "armor" or a trauma response itself. I think I could do very light massage, but it's just not worth it for me. My therapist is able to use some gentle touch and I do some of my own stretching for the pain (and mild muscle relaxants as needed).

 

[Leigh925]

Yes. I go at least twice a month. Sometimes I go once a week. It has helped me learn that there is such a thing as safe touch. I have also learned to be in my body more and dissociate a whole lot less. My massage therapist knows the basics of my trauma and works with a lot of people who have had trauma. She herself is a rape survivor. I had a lot of physical pain for years. Between therapy and massage so much of it has improved or gone away completely. I feel like so much of it was from holding in all of the stress and secrets for years. I was nervous at first but it had been one of the best things I have ever done and I highly recommend it.

If you are prone to dissociation you might want to do it at a time where you can go home right after. In the beginning I don't think I would have been able to go back to work or be productive in any way for a couple of hours after. Now it is no big deal.

Also you might read The Body Keeps The Score. Reading this is what propelled me into using bodywork as an adjunct to my therapy.

Good luck!

 

[Sideways]

I know a couple of SA survivors who both use the same massage therapist - local woman that specialises in trauma survivors. Both of them say it's been incredibly helpful, but caveat that by saying the technique is v different to your usual massage place. Both had issues with skin contact when they started out. It's something about the way she responds to the body reactions rather than just provoking them.

Haven't been game enough to try it out, but I am curious to hear from people that it's worked for. Massage therapists that specialise in this stuff are definitely out there if you go looking.

 

[Crow]

I can get massages on a cruise ship okay. Last year I started going every two weeks getting kneck massages. That lasted 3 sessions. Last week I signed up with a spa to have one massage a month. I figured out I can't deal with the connection with the therapist so maybe the spa environment - like on a cruise ship - will be easier. I'm gonna try anyway. T has been suggesting it for years.