George MacDonald has a book called At the Back of the North Wind. I read it when I was little, and the again several years ago, then a couple years ago.
After that, because I'm in the high functioning autism spectrum (bet you can't tell ;) ), I read it about six more times because I sensed there was something important in it for me.
I was right. Or I hope I was, anyway. In it, (huge spoiler alert, code red!), the North Wind represents suffering and/or death. As such she is a direct agent of God. She never knows the purpose of her activities, and she sometimes feels a bit unhappy about them, but she is wholly trusting that she is doing right.
The North Wind befriends a boy, who eventually (spoiler alert code purple!) dies of the marsh fever he catches while out with her. But meanwhile what the North Wind teaches him, grows "like a mustard seed" and changes dozens of London lives for the better.
Macdonald repeats this theme very often in his works. Suffering is the old/young woman, always beautiful and loving, as stately as a goddess and patient as a mother.
Some very early Christian authors (orthodox, not the dubious ones) saw suffering in the same light. They saw trials, pains, even small inconveniences, as reminders that the Father was guiding their way.
Somewhere along the way, trials and suffering turned into "tests" of our faith, and "punishment" even for sins.
There's stuff that happens because people don't know who they are anymore. They've gotten lost. Their focus is in the wrong place.
No matter how great your focus is yourself, if someone drops a brick on your head, under normal circumstances, it will hurt.
I can't pray that away. What? Do I not have enough faith? Well, my faith muscle primarily resides in the space that is presently occupied by stars, thank you.
Did God send the brick?
Well, yes. In my reading I see he ultimately does have the final say in human decisions, though clearly he's installed a will truly independent of his.
It's now my turn to *do* something, I believe, with the Brick Incident. I have very limited choices, but some of them can really make a difference in my life.
I can throw it back at the Brick Throwing Dude.
I can sit down and make a huge scene.
I can pretend, as best I can, it didn't happen.
I can go to law enforcement.
I can bleed or not.
I can get a big bruise.
I can activate my amygdala.
So some of those last aren't really up to me. To me, they are a reminder that others are also subject to suffering as I am.
As to the Brick Throwing Dude, as a follower of Christ I'm to remember (maybe after my headache goes away), that my part is to identify suffering in others and heal wounds. Maybe this is an opening with the BTD? I have actually had something like this happen a couple of times!
What if it really is unmistakably my own mistake? My philosophy now is, God really just wants me to make the choice at hand right this second. If I screw that up, that is what "suffering" is for.
I think this is really hard to explain in today's western culture. If you've trained horses you understand how they can be taught, without force, to move from pressure.
If you've ever had a trainer demonstrate how this works on *you*, you may understand how you can learn extremely rapidly from tiny pressure cues (pointing/blocking from a whip).
The cues start larger, but as you learn to recognize them, they diminish until you feel as if you and the trainer are psychic. It's crazy weird and awesome at the same time. No words or commands have passed, only you opening your mind and will to the trainer.
I believe this is the ultimate goal of any type of suffering, to get us to open our mind and will to the Creator. And I believe, from both reading and personal experience, all he wants is to finish "making" us,
After that, because I'm in the high functioning autism spectrum (bet you can't tell ;) ), I read it about six more times because I sensed there was something important in it for me.
I was right. Or I hope I was, anyway. In it, (huge spoiler alert, code red!), the North Wind represents suffering and/or death. As such she is a direct agent of God. She never knows the purpose of her activities, and she sometimes feels a bit unhappy about them, but she is wholly trusting that she is doing right.
The North Wind befriends a boy, who eventually (spoiler alert code purple!) dies of the marsh fever he catches while out with her. But meanwhile what the North Wind teaches him, grows "like a mustard seed" and changes dozens of London lives for the better.
Macdonald repeats this theme very often in his works. Suffering is the old/young woman, always beautiful and loving, as stately as a goddess and patient as a mother.
Some very early Christian authors (orthodox, not the dubious ones) saw suffering in the same light. They saw trials, pains, even small inconveniences, as reminders that the Father was guiding their way.
Somewhere along the way, trials and suffering turned into "tests" of our faith, and "punishment" even for sins.
There's stuff that happens because people don't know who they are anymore. They've gotten lost. Their focus is in the wrong place.
No matter how great your focus is yourself, if someone drops a brick on your head, under normal circumstances, it will hurt.
I can't pray that away. What? Do I not have enough faith? Well, my faith muscle primarily resides in the space that is presently occupied by stars, thank you.
Did God send the brick?
Well, yes. In my reading I see he ultimately does have the final say in human decisions, though clearly he's installed a will truly independent of his.
It's now my turn to *do* something, I believe, with the Brick Incident. I have very limited choices, but some of them can really make a difference in my life.
I can throw it back at the Brick Throwing Dude.
I can sit down and make a huge scene.
I can pretend, as best I can, it didn't happen.
I can go to law enforcement.
I can bleed or not.
I can get a big bruise.
I can activate my amygdala.
So some of those last aren't really up to me. To me, they are a reminder that others are also subject to suffering as I am.
As to the Brick Throwing Dude, as a follower of Christ I'm to remember (maybe after my headache goes away), that my part is to identify suffering in others and heal wounds. Maybe this is an opening with the BTD? I have actually had something like this happen a couple of times!
What if it really is unmistakably my own mistake? My philosophy now is, God really just wants me to make the choice at hand right this second. If I screw that up, that is what "suffering" is for.
I think this is really hard to explain in today's western culture. If you've trained horses you understand how they can be taught, without force, to move from pressure.
If you've ever had a trainer demonstrate how this works on *you*, you may understand how you can learn extremely rapidly from tiny pressure cues (pointing/blocking from a whip).
The cues start larger, but as you learn to recognize them, they diminish until you feel as if you and the trainer are psychic. It's crazy weird and awesome at the same time. No words or commands have passed, only you opening your mind and will to the trainer.
I believe this is the ultimate goal of any type of suffering, to get us to open our mind and will to the Creator. And I believe, from both reading and personal experience, all he wants is to finish "making" us,
