Rage Against the World for the last 3 years

[Upside Down Eagle]

Hey gals, guys, forum people.
Don't want to make this a political discussion.

I just feel so incredibly frustrated. I have a tendency to isolate and I do so by negatively judging others.
In the past three-four years there's been a LOT of ammunition out there for someone like me.

Wars and an endless stream of lies and media nonsense. It makes me so mad.
People are dying. I really don't care which side they are on, and I don't see why it matters.

I was ousted and shunned by society during the whole lock down thing. I was framed as a loony.
This isn't me judging others for making different choices. Everyone is free - or should be free - to make the best choice for themselves.

But to be treated like that, really added to my judgement problem. And now people around me are partying as if nothing happened.
In my experience the world changed during that period, and I don't want to stick my head in the sand.

Was just wondering if there are others here who feel similarly.
There have been some good changes too in the last three years. It ain't all a horror show, thankfully.

Gwaihir

 

[Ecdysis]

Hmm, I guess everybody's experience of that time is different, but I guess what we have in common is that it was intense for a lot of us.

One thing I've found shocking is how divisive things seem to have gotten. People argue and fight about the weirdest sh*t these days. And people who used to strike me as relatively sane/ stable/ balanced now strike me as being unstable nutcases and I've started watching what I say. Previously, I've usually spoken my mind honestly. These days I tend to just nod non-committally when people start talking weird crap and I just try to change the subject. It feels like the whole world/ society kind of got dysregulated during that time.

I've been socially isolating a lot and even tho the pandemic is over, I'm still socially isolating. And I think this sense that so many people went strange and dysregulated has a lot to do with it. The whole situation makes me really sad. And sometimes it makes me scared to think what a dysregulated society might turn into.

 

[arfie]

I was ousted and shunned by society during the whole lock down thing. I was framed as a loony.

i was framed as a federally certified loony --with the disability check to prove it-- long before spring of 2020 but the covidic yaddah blahs dawned over the grieving of my son (daddy) and his wife (mommy) and. . . girl howdy that casual disregard hurt more than i have words to describe. one of the age peers who abandoned ship advised the eldest orphan to be careful not to get his germy kisses anywhere near my covid-susceptible senior mouth as she was abandoning us. i hastened her efficiency in increasing social distances. by daddy's first posthumous birthday, we were grieving the loss of our world with approximately equal intensity. the munchkins were even sad when the social worker visits went virtual. children are such naturally social critters.

fast forward to 2024 and the children are doing well in finding classmates whose playdating parents are tolerant of the whachmacallits the need for playdating. hubs has his business back up to pre-covid efficiency. me? ? ? i seem to be spending more time on the bioweb than the freshly upgraded virtual world. i'm okay maintaining the proper social distances, especially with the friends who abandoned ship. we're old enough that the medical adventures were getting a bit tedious to listen to, anyway.

 

[Friday]

For most of my adult life, if I’m in a “burn the world down” mindset?

1. I’ve learned that’s almost always “just” my PTSD going claws out. It’s temporary, and will pass. (The few times it’s not? Has been grief. My grief gets reeeeeally f*cking violent.)

2. I head to one of those areas in conflict, until I work it out of my system, and start loving people & life, again.

^^^ THAT ^^^ (plus passing familiarity with history, which paints today as neeeeearly the best time to live… ever)… means that I just don’t get angry, about shit I’m not willing to do something about.

Sitting around bitching & seething? Is just a waste of time/life.

Carpe Diem. Or? Do something about it. One or the other.

 

[Upside Down Eagle]

Hmm, I guess everybody's experience of that time is different, but I guess what we have in common is that it was intense for a lot of us.

One thing I've found shocking is how divisive things seem to have gotten.

Yeah, maybe this is also part of what adds to the inclination to judge... with an atmosphere so divisive, lack of discussion, judgement gets easier...
To be honest, I also strike myself as an unstable nutcase, but I was already there prior to the whole outburst :P

I hope there can be some kind of collective healing for the mental instability the entire world seems to be going through. Maybe it's like with PTSD and you first have to break down before you can get anywhere more constructive.

i was framed as a federally certified loony --with the disability check to prove it-- long before spring of 2020 but the covidic yaddah blahs dawned

I hadn't even realized that that others may have dealt with that kind of stigma long before 2020, so thank you for reminding me :) Sounds like an awful situation to be in... it is good to have like-minded people around, like the playdates' parents...

1. I’ve learned that’s almost always “just” my PTSD going claws out. It’s temporary, and will pass.

For me, I think whatever intense reactions we have always is a mix of the circumstances our collective culture went through.... you got your ancestral trauma, your very own personal trauma (yay), your societal trauma - we're all just a tiny cog. Then there's the whole other realm of past life - assuming that such a thing exists.

Yea it's often PTSD, but usually there tend to be other things thrown into the mix too - like our current disinclination (as a society) to talk things through in some kind of calm way. Doesn't mean that I want to sit back and just scream at people. I am doing shit about it, but it's nice to talk to a community of kindred spirits.

Sitting around bitching & seething? Is just a waste of time/life.

Sounds like PTSD in a nutshell to me :P

 

[arfie]

that others may have dealt with that kind of stigma long before 2020

on the non-pandemic end, child prostitute survivors are so adept at social distancing that i knew what social distancing was back in the 60's. masking was more metaphorical, but far more comprehensible as a metaphor than pandemic control.

on the pandemic management end, the first round of that grand model ended as one of history's great secrets. it never officially ended and nobody would talk about it after the unspoken agreement that, "we've had enough." have we still more evidence that forgetting history is a fool's prayer to do it all again?

Spanish Flu - Symptoms, How It Began & Ended

addendum
thank you for the opportunity to vent. my recovery from the free love pandemic of the 60's has given me ample evidence that venting really does help.

 

[Flying Dove]

Hey gals, guys, forum people.
Don't want to make this a political discussion.

I just feel so incredibly frustrated. I have a tendency to isolate and I do so by negatively judging others.
In the past three-four years there's been a LOT of ammunition out there for someone like me.

Wars and an endless stream of lies and media nonsense. It makes me so mad.
People are dying. I really don't care which side they are on, and I don't see why it matters.

I was ousted and shunned by society during the whole lock down thing. I was framed as a loony.
This isn't me judging others for making different choices. Everyone is free - or should be free - to make the best choice for themselves.

But to be treated like that, really added to my judgement problem. And now people around me are partying as if nothing happened.
In my experience the world changed during that period, and I don't want to stick my head in the sand.

Was just wondering if there are others here who feel similarly.
There have been some good changes too in the last three years. It ain't all a horror show, thankfully.

Gwaihir

Yes I have similar issues. Not sure how to say this but the world turned upside down. I am afraid of the media too with its lies undue influence the ability to alter reality to get the response dictated by corporations. have done reserach on what happens after a pandemic. Some of what we see is expected. Yes I agree good changes have occurred too. I feel people have to focus on life and what really matters is important
.

 

[Friday]

Sounds like PTSD in a nutshell to me :P

Totally different thing, for me, anyways. But I DO know a lot of people who avoid their own problems, by fixating on problems they’re never gonna even influence, much less solve. As kind of a perfect energy suck. Be mad. Do nothing. Repeat.

 

[looking for the road]

I would agree with many of you that the world has gone stupid. A few said things are upside down? My question is if you don’t like it do something about it? Just like us now we talk about our PTSD what are you doing about it ? I m seeing a TP reading your comments learning online how to deal with myself in today's society. If you want change stand-up take control over you want your life to go? I made a decision to make myself better. Or yank yourself up by your bootstraps.
May you have a great day

 

[Sideways]

Or yank yourself up by your bootstraps.

If it were possible to do this to overcome mental illness, it wouldn’t be mental illness.

 

[DarkVixen]

I was diagnosed in 2007, so when covid hit and the world decided to hide, I was in my glory. I loved going out because no one was going out and no one wanted to chit chat with a stranger if they did manage to come out. It was awesome.

But I do understand what you are saying about the world. For those who weren't already of the mind set of "them vs us", you could see them calculating do they leave the sidewalk or do they pass you on the road. Everyone became the boogeyman. Fear is a great motivator to start judging others I think. As someone with ptsd I find fear makes me judge a lot of people. Where I felt alone on seeing the bad everywhere, its strange to think how the world has now seemed to collectively start suffering from some of the symptoms of ptsd. I think this started before covid. Possibly 911 had a greater effect on people as we all saw how the boogeyman that we had all thought was someone else's boogeyman, became ours. Collectively I think the world has had a lot to deal with in the past few decades.