Reducing Fear At The Dentist

[sun seeker]

I've started to get anxious about a dentist appointment next week. Having a dental exam brings me close to panic. I'm doing them more often after putting it off too long in the past and having some nasty surprises, but still, the last time I was barely hanging on and almost wanted to ask to be sedated. My teeth are pretty demineralized and decay easily even though I take care of them. Something about the anticipation of being told I have to lose still more teeth or spend lots of money that I don't have sets my survival fear into high gear and I lie there gripping the arms of the chair and trying not to hyperventilate.

One thing I think might help is if I could be in a partially reclined position instead of lying flat on my back with the hygienist bending over me, a position that is a trigger in itself. I have a hard time speaking up for what I need though and somehow haven't gotten the words out. Does anyone know if there is a reason they need to have you flat on your back? I seem to remember other dentists I've gone to didn't do that.

Does anyone else go through this? Are there any accommodations you've asked for that make it easier for you? Thanks.

 

[rightkindofme]

I am not flat on my back and I would refuse to do so. I mean, once in a while a dentist wants to get at my Very Back tooth and I have to lie down for a minute or two, but it is never a whole visit.

My dentist is awesome. I came in saying, "I have extreme trauma issues that revolve around traumatic dental experiences. I need you to be nice to me and act like I'm made out of glass."

I've been seeing him for 8 years now and it is going well. I had to change hygienists within his practice because the first lady bugged me, but that seems reasonable.

If you speak before the visit starts often it is easier to change how things go. They don't know you need something specific unless you ask.

 

[Deleted member 20280]

Having Dental work sends me right off. I have today bought and fitted a rugby mouth guard rather than go and see a Dentist and have a proper Orthodontic one fitted (Which I really need).

TBH I would rather poke my own Eye's out with a hot spoon than see a dentist, you have my heartfelt :hug:s on this one.

Laurie

 

[jaccat]

If you feel you can't talk to them could you write them a note? Perhaps hand it to the receptionist to give to the dentist before you go then maybe he won't even have to talk to you about it?

 

[sun seeker]

Thanks @rightkindofme, I will gather up my courage and tell them. My trauma doesn't have to do with dental work particularly, but I can just tell them I have extreme anxiety about lying flat on my back with someone bending over me, and if they are tactful at all they won't ask. I mostly wanted reassurance that it wasn't some unreasonable thing to ask. It also helps if they talk to me and tell me what is going on, instead of ignoring me until the end of the visit. I used to go to a dentist that was great at that, but when they got an ultrasonic cleaner that goes way under the gumline and did a cleaning with it that kicked off my fibromyalgia and put me into full-body pain for three months, and then didn't understand when I tried to tell them how bad it was, I changed dentists.

TBH I would rather poke my own Eye's out with a hot spoon than see a dentist, you have my heartfelt :hug:s on this one.

Sorry about that! I put it off for a long time but am trying to go every six months like you are supposed to now, hoping the damage is less each time. For me it's not so much the work itself as the potential for bad news that puts me into panic mode.

 

[sun seeker]

If you feel you can't talk to them could you write them a note?

Thanks. I think I'll be okay talking. Knowing that not every dentist does it that way gave me the courage I needed.

 

[HëllaBubz]

They're going to have to fully put me under to do my teeth.

 

[Seagreen]

I felt more comfortable with a female dentist if that is an option that you think could be helpful?

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Do you have a benzo you could take before your appointment that would help you get through it? I know that is something that is recommended often. Its crazy how many of us have dental traumas! (Well, mine was traumatic for a 5 year old child, even if it wasn't PTSD-traumatic!)

 

[sun seeker]

Sorry about that @TheBubzilla. Sounds awful.

@Seagreen, for me it's not the work the dentist does that is a problem, it's the exam, which is done by a female hygienist. Thanks for the suggestion though, I'm glad you found something that works for you.

Solara, that's an idea, I'm not sure if it's an option or not. No I don't have any, but I wonder if the dentist does. Some dentists offer sedation, don't they? If I would have to get a prescription before the appointment, that's a bit more complicated.

My dental history is weird - my parents never thought to take me to a dentist until I was 12. Not that they couldn't afford to, they were just that spaced out and not thinking about me. By that time I had tons of cavities and had a whole lot of mercury put in my mouth, which I've since had taken out. Then during the time I lived with my ex I was too depressed to care much about taking care of my teeth, and ended up again with lots of decay and abscesses. I'm convinced the infection was at least part of the trigger for the fibromyalgia I suffered for years. Now I have things under control better but they still seem to decay awfully easily, so I am working on remineralizing so hopefully I can keep the ones I have left. Being afraid of bad news is part of my panic now whenever I have an exam.

 

[SweetPeaandSunBird]

As a teen I was choked by my father in a rageful fit, ever since having anyone come at my face/throat region is literally a breath-taking experience. I avoided any dental appointment from the age of 18 to 43 years of age. Finally, I had to make an economical decision to have what was left of my tattered teeth removed and get full plate dentures (after decades of neglect and grinding/gnashing of teeth in my sleep and wakeful hours). A friend of mine (a domestic abuse survivor) recommended me to her dentist because he has been great with her issues. After talking with him and his staff, I made it through all the procedures. If you speak with or write to a dentist and his/her staff and they don't seem to fully fathom the issue, I'd look for another, but if you find that after discussing the issue your current dentist seems to understand, I think you'll find it much better in the long run.

I'm quite happy and thankful that I finally took care of things (though my bank account is quite sad about it). I wish you the best. Support!

 

[Karen12]

A visit to the dentist is one of the harder things for me, too. Something to keep in mind is that many people have anxiety about going to the dentist - please understand I'm NOT comparing that to PTSD, I'm just saying that it's likely the dentist has had other patients who've expressed have anxiety, too, and they're inclined to be understanding (at least the good ones).