School Disability Accommodation

[TTC18]

So I talked with the disability accommodation guy today. Asked if I could get away with not working in groups for a semester while I get my meds in check or something because dealing with people is really hard for me right now. Got a 20 minute lecture about all the stuff I should be doing to fix my issue, how I should be using resources to not isolate myself, and a whole TON of unsolicited advice while I sat and cried on the phone. He finished up by saying I should not be taking classes right now, and to get into therapy faster if possible. Then he asked if he was helpful. I actually told him that I felt worse now than I had before I called. That I was doing the best I can. He said he wasn't trying to be critical, but he's a problem solver. I said - so am I, but this isn't something that can just be fixed. He said again that I should not try to take classes right now. So, I guess I'm dropping out of school. I dropped classes halfway through last semester because I couldn't handle working in the groups. And there's nothing else to do but just - nothing, I guess. Crap.

 

[Neverthesame]

The idea behind accommodations, is to allow you to be able to do the same thing expected of everyone else, by modifying the approach in a way that allows you to accomplish what is expected of everyone else, how it's expected of everyone else. Without requiring the faculty or management to alter the way they do what's required of them.

A good example of this is:
A student with poor eyesight that cannot see the blackboard from their desk in the back row of the class.
-A reasonable accommodation would be for the student to sit closer to the blackboard so they can read what's been written.

-An unreasonable accommodation would be expecting the teacher to transcribe what's on the board to a separate sheet of paper to be given to the student still sitting in the back row.

Now, I understand why you're upset. That dis/accom guy might be a problem solver, but a diplomat he clearly ain't.
Is there a way you can think of to be able to make working in a group possible?

 

[Friday]

Is there a way you can think of to be able to make working in a group possible?

This.

Also?

Or classes where group work isn’t required? Even if it’s just a gym class or art class to keep your hand in the game / credits being chipped away at whilst you work on being able to do group-work?

Some degree paths absolutely require teams and groups. Others, they’re simply done to make life “easier” on students. The “easier” ones, I’ve always found professors totally on board for my doing projects solo, as long as I understand I’ve just tripled (or more) my work load. I had a baby at home, so reeeeeally needed to confine my group-logistics To required groups (like practicums, etc.) rather than “easy button” groups. Not paying out hundreds in daycare & losing hours in transportation & the inevitable hanging out made it well worth my time to work solo.

I’ve never applied for accommodations through my university, although I worked in the office from time to time... I simply spoke to my professors individually & worked things out as I needed them. I was pretty ruthless about professor selection, would drop/switch a class out in a heartbeat if on Day 1 I could tell by their syllabus we weren’t going to get on... and as much as possible took classes from professors I knew, and had a relationship with already.

 

[TTC18]

I have to take the 2 classes I was registered for in this order for my degree program, and both involve group projects, simply because they're how the classes are set up. I don't know if it would have been possible to do the projects without being in groups, because the disability accommodations guy never actually discussed any sort of accommodations - he just wanted to tell me how to stop having PTSD. LOL. I'm just so burned out on everything right now - I was hoping to try to stay in school to keep even a tiny degree of 'normal' in my life, since everything seems turned on its head right now, but - meh.

 

[Friday]

I don't know if it would have been possible to do the projects without being in groups, because the disability accommodations guy never actually discussed any sort of accommodations

He wouldn’t know. That would be a question to put to your professors. It’s not like the disability office gets a list of syllabi & goals for every class, with a short essay on the teacher’s preferences, ya know?

I’d personally ignore pretty much everything he said, as one asshole’s opinion, and take it to your therapist & professors to problem solve / figure out what’s workable.

 

[Neverthesame]

When is the majority of the group work being done? In class or out of class?

If it's out of class, could you arrange to meet with your group over a service like Skype or Discord? Would that be easier for you?

If you don't mind sharing (you don't have too of course), what is it specifically about working in a group setting that you find unbearable?
Are there multiple reasons?
If you could remove a couple of these reasons, would you be able to tolerate it?

 

[TTC18]

Out of class. It's dealing with forceful personalities. If I disagree with something someone says, and they are rude about it or I venture an opinion and they ignore it or talk down to me, or if I ask for something and they refuse - basically if everyone isn't super nice and considerate - I get to crying and can't stop. And I am barely holding my schedule together already - and having to try to comply with other people's schedules would be much harder. Every day/week I'd be trying to find ways to fit other people's meeting schedules with mine. last semester there were a few people in my group who always wanted to wait till the last minute - and were jerks about it when I protested. I ended up just dropping classes because I couldn't handle the interpersonal conflict. I can usually deal with those things - I know how to talk to people and resolve stuff, etc... But right now, I just can't. I can barely handle my own internal conflicts, lol, much less adding a bunch of other outside personalities into the mix.

 

[scout86]

The first thought that came to mind was to wonder if THAT guy is the only person doing (or trying to do) that job. If he's not, it might be worth talking to someone else. Maybe there's someone in that office who can actually identify the problem they're being asked to work with.

But, reflecting on my "let's see if they'll really kick me out of school/ you can't fire me , I quit" phase....... I went to college for 2 years, really made a self destructive mess of things, quit for 2 years, then went back and finished. It was a good thing, in my case. (I should add that, at that point, I didn't know I had PTSD and........well I was handling life about as well as one often does in that situation.)

So, if you quit school for awhile, what will you do? I got a job, related to my field of study, enjoyed the heck out of the job, and had a constructive outlet for the "let's see if I can get killed doing THIS" energy. Leaving school for awhile can be fine. But, like you said, some sort of structure and purpose is important.

 

[TTC18]

I don't know - have no direction right now at all. Just trying to get through, really. Today's a bad day to think/answer questions. A week on zoloft and I'm a zombie for lack of sleep. Didn't take today's pill, doc said I could go on something else instead, and I'm sensitive to medications.

 

[EveHarrington]

It sounds like maybe you’re taking on too much right now.

New therapist, new doc, new meds, and school, too?

 

[TTC18]

Well, I've been in school for a while. I was kind of trying to hang on to *something* that felt normal - with all the other 'new' stuff.

 

[EveHarrington]

I understand but weren’t you struggling last semester, too, without all this new stuff?