Sufferer Seeking Support From Others Who Have Done Emdr

[Tif]

Hi,

I have PTSD, and my first flashbacks started when I was 14. I experienced childhood physical abuse at the hands of my father, abandonment by my alcoholic mother (most recently just last month), rape at 18, and a verbally and physically abusive relationship from 19-25.

I just went looking for a place where other people might understand what I'm experiencing as I go through EMDR, because I have no friends with real experience both with trauma and EMDR. And I found this place.

So, hi!

 

[intothelight]

Hi Tif,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum! :)

As you look around there are many threads and posts regarding EMDR. I hope you find the information and support here helpful as you work on healing.

Take care.

Debbie

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

 

[Tif]

Thanks for the welcome! :)

 

[samson]

Hi Tif,

I've been doing emdr for about a year and a half. I would love to share experiences with you. I find it really hard but really helpful sometimes. :)

Welcome to the forum.

Samson

 

[Maggiemay]

I started on Tuesday. Didn't achieve anything. We were only trying to install a safe place, but I found it hard to focus on my inner thoughts/ sensations and be in the present as I have a strong tendacy to retreat into myself and dissociate. I ended up very anxious and stopped at became tearful and nearly walked out. I was hopeful this was going to help withmy bbody memories, but it appears it's not going to be as easy as I thought...

 

[KP the nut]

Didn't achieve anything

Any good therapist will not start the actual sessions until they are satisfied that you have an established safe place and that you know some grounding techniques. Trust me, you will need them and they are important.

When I first started, I was a little disappointed at what I thought was a slow start - little did I know.

Good luck.

 

[Tif]

Maggie: Hang in there; it can be tough, especially when you're being triggered by circumstances. Like Tuesday night, my T had to help me find a new safe place because my old one wasn't working any more and I couldn't really get there (and when I did, it wasn't "safe" anymore).

I've been in therapy since I was a kid, and sometimes it's hard, and sometimes it's easier. It's never really easy because I'm dealing with a lot of really awful things that have happened... But I have to tell you, when I really started EMDR, the results were extremely fast for me. Four sessions were as effective for me as six months of talk therapy, and I think a lot of the reason for that (aside from it being EMDR) is because I don't have to talk through the hard stuff, explain myself, or worry about what my T is thinking when I'm telling her about the darkest and ugliest parts of me. :)

 

[Maggiemay]

Thanks guys :)

I know installing a safe place is important, but I didn't expect it to be so much of a challenge. I too have been in therapy on and off since I was 12, I'm now 29 and still struggling. I've achieved all I can now using traditional talk therapies, it's the right time to change tactics.

 

[Dennis # 121]

Welcome, I have gone through EMDR and what a difference it has made in my life. I found in the beginning I had allot of anger after the session. I have completed the EMDR and it's is so nice to put those feelings, thoughts and anger behind me. I feel I am beginning to enjoy life again. My PTSD cost me a marriage, but after looking back I believe she was part of the triggers. She also wasn't supportive. A safe place is wonderful, and thankfully I never had to use mine. Good luck and stick with the treatment, it can and will change you into a better person. Do it for yourself, no one else, that is really important!

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum. :)

 

[Tif]

Thanks everyone! :)

I had a session last week, and I have another next week.... And right now, I just feel emotionally stuck. Like I can't move on. Luckily, I've been distracted by the pressure of finals and work, but I'm taking a much-needed and well-earned vacation, and with no money, I'm actually worried I'll just be alone with my thoughts.

Maybe I'll go out and fly my kites a little, or something. I need to finish organizing my room.... And I still have a bookshelf to put together.... And a pile of laundry I've been procrastinating about folding and hanging....

I did get my kitchen mostly finished today, and the living room. :) So, that's a step forward, since things have been a mess the last two weeks.